Non Verbal Attraction

Introduction: This lesson will cover the topic of “non verbal sexuality” and how it plays into a seduction.

Non-Verbal Sexuality Non-verbal sexuality is really important because, first off, at some point you have to develop this nonverbal sexuality or else your relationship won't go to the physical level. It'll just be a verbal flirtation, but it does a lot of other things as well. It increases the sexual tension. When you begin to use nonverbal sexuality, it completely amplifies the sexual tension because now there is physicality involved. Now there are gestures. There are facial expressions. There's so much more at stake than just words because words can become meaningless. If you followed all the stuff in the Verbal Escalation, then you know that talking is important, but a lot of times talk can be seen as cheap

after a while if you don't use nonverbal escalation as well. It separates you from the friendly level. Like I said, once you really master verbal sexuality and verbal escalation, it's going to be hard for a woman to place you in a friend zone, but when you're using nonverbal sexuality as well, it's impossible for her to place you in a friend zone. It definitely separates you from that friendly level, but it does also have some added extra value. It gets her comfortable with your hands on her. This is really important because if you're going to escalate it to a physical level - and if you've studied any kind of dating material you probably know the importance of touch - the sooner you begin touching her the easier it is later on to kiss her and to get her back to your place. NOTE: In last week’s audio class we covered some great stuff on this topic. That awkwardness of all of a sudden, two hours into a conversation, going for a kiss when you haven't even gotten your hands on her at all is difficult. When you do this nonverbal sexuality that we're going to be talking about this week, it makes it a lot easier. So, what is nonverbal sexuality? Some examples are: 1. Purposely getting caught looking. Purposely getting caught looking is a great way to show her that you're sexually attracted to her and introduce this nonverbal sexual attraction. 2. Rewarding her with smiles - now a lot of guys use smiles too frequently. They're just happy to be talking to a girl so they have a shit-eating grin plastered across their face. That comes across as kind of cheesy. However, if you use smiles to let her know it's

escalating, if you use smiles to reward her for doing something or to let her know that you're happy with the way things are going, it's okay. You just don't want to have a smile plastered on your face the whole time you're talking to her. 3. Tickling - tickling is something that is a little further along. You can't just start tickling a girl within minutes of talking to her, but as it's progressing, tickling is a great way to get physical with a girl. with girls. 4. Playful Fighting- One of the things back in college I was known for was I would start wrestling. Usually there was some alcohol involved, but I would just start playfully teasing them and then I would be like, "Oh, let me put you in a figure-four. Let me put you in a wrestling move," just kidding around. The girl would usually play back and she'd start playing around. Very easily you start tickling her and it creates a very sexual vibe. 5. Playful Bullying- A simpler way that you can do very early in an interaction is stay in her way when she's trying to get past you. Just keep moving in front of her until she's kind of got to push you. Usually, that's a great way to bait her to touch you because after a while she'll kind of push you out of the way and she'll put her hands on you first, which kind of gives you the okay to put your hands back on her. Another thing I love to do is make her touch a guy's ass. I do this a lot if I'm talking to a girl and we start having a little bit of banter and I don't know how I can start touching her. I'll playfully take her hand and make her hand touch the guy’s behind her ass. A) It gets my hand to touch her hand, and it gets me to have my hand on her, but normally what will happen afterwards is she'll be like, "You jerk," and she'll kind of hit me. You can kind of grab her hand again to

stop her from hitting you. It's just a great way to get that flirtatious physicality going. 6. Being overly dramatic, that is simply just making an "oh my God" sort of face or just a face like, "You are turning me on so much." You're just over-dramatizing the facial expressions you're making to something she just did. 7. Thumb wrestling - is an easy way to nonverbally escalate. Like I said, once you get your hands in her hands, that's really such a crucial step because it makes kissing her later on so much easier. Thumb wrestling is an innocent way to get your hands and her hands together. Hot hands - hot hands is really good but I just feel like ever since the movie "Wedding Crashers" it's kind of a cliché and I've been reluctant to use it, but it is an excellent way to get that physicality going. 8. Slapping her butt like she's a brat - when she says something that you don't like you can go and spank her. I mean, it's a little ballsy, but most girls generally will let you do it. It definitely introduces some sexuality. Throwing her over your shoulder and walking away with her - a great, innocent sort of way to start touching her and introduce that sexuality. The reason you're doing all these things, especially the physical things like throwing her over your shoulder, tickling her, spanking her, it's because you're just getting her comfortable with you touching her. You're creating that vibe where it's very easy to go from throwing her over shoulder to then falling onto the couch, and then to kissing. It's very simple. Nonverbal seduction, so this is where you're crossing the boundary between flirtation and seduction. A lot of guys that I talk to say, "Yeah, I have no problem flirting with a girl or talking about sex, but I don't know how to get it to that sexual level. I mean, verbally it's at a

sexual level, but there seems to be no break. There's no sexual attraction that's just making her and me kiss, making it inevitable that we kiss." My advice is usually, first of all, slow down. Slowing down actually makes you become more seductive. When you're talking a mile a minute and you're gesturing, that's not really sexy or seductive. But when you begin to slow down at some point, she'll notice the shift and she knows what that means. That's part of the tension that's being built is when you slow down, become more seductive. Get closer to her. Kind of intrude a little bit on her personal space. You don't want to do that right off the bat, but as you're flirting and the flirtation is escalating, begin to get closer to her and begin to touch her more. These will definitely amplify the attraction. They will amplify the tension. It will make it a little uncomfortable for the both of you, but like I talked about in the lesson on sexual tension, if you're able to handle that tension it is very attractive to her. How do you initiate it? How do you initiate touching? Let's give you an example of how to initiate something like thumb wrestling or hot hands. You can say something like, "I hate you. Actually, wait. That may have come across wrong. I really hate you. You know why? You remind me of Justine from second grade. She always beat me at hot hands. Here, let's see." Then play hot hands with her. If you beat her you go, "Okay, I don't hate you because I can beat you at hot hands." If she beats you, which shouldn't happen, say, "See? I knew I was right. I hate you. You beat me at hot hands." Just a cheesy, little simple way to get her doing it. You can use it for thumb wrestling too, probably better using it for thumb wrestling now ever since the "Wedding Crashers" came out. Even though the movie

is a few years old, I still feel like when you do that it's got a little bit of stigma. If she says she's stressed say, "Hey, I'll help you relax with an ancient Indian relaxation technique. Start gently rubbing your earlobe and pulling your hair back firmly." Which, when you pull a girls hair back firmly while you're rubbing her earlobe, she's going to get all hot and flustered and it's going to trigger her natural horniness. You can say, "Do you know what women's number one fantasy is?" They usually don't know, at which point you can say, "I can't really tell you. I have to show you so you can experience it." Then move in very close. "It's to have adventure and danger with someone strong and powerful, and it feels like this." Reach behind her head and pull her hair. If she shows goose bump reaction, which she probably will, say, "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I turn you into a quivering, horny mess?" Right there, that's going to get a reaction out of her. That is crossing that boundary in one full sweep. Touching a girl's hair - if way back when you ever read "Double Your Dating" and he does the kiss test where you just sort of brush her hair or touch her hair. Her hair, for women, is a very sexual place. When you kind of tug on it a little bit, it just sends a very sexual message to her. It's probably the closest you can get to being sexual without touching her breasts or her crotch area. Her hair is a great way to do it. What to practica this week: Read through this again and pay close attention to nonverbal escalation. You want to, very quickly, get yourself nonverbally escalated whether it be touching her hands, tickling her, anything that is sexual but nonverbal. Because you've got to mix the two of them up if you want to take it to the final level, which is ultimately sex.