Searching For Spirit Norman Hutt

Searching for Spirit

By Norman Hutt

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Table of Contents Chapter 1: Chapter 2: Chapter 3: Chapter 4: Chapter 5: Chapter 6: Chapter 7: Chapter 8: Chapter 9: Chapter 10: Chapter 11: Chapter 12: Chapter 13: Chapter 14: Chapter 15:

The search begins P.4 Joining the Spiritualist Church P.9 The Swansea experience P. 14 A big climax P. 19 Down to Earth P.22 Back to basics P. 26 Face changes P. 32 The Noah’s Ark Society P. 37 The Tesla coil in circle P.41 Physical versus mental? P.45 Only the physical p.50 I leave the Tesla circle P.54 A lonely time P.56 My own physical circle P.60 More than just messages P.64

Appendix 1: Messages from mental mediums P.67 Appendix 2: Some influential books about mediumship P.73

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Introduction Are you curious about the psychic and the Spirit World? Would you like to look in to it and find out what it’s all about? Do you wonder if mediums and psychics are the only ones with any spiritual gifts? Are you reluctant to believe all that they say? Do you think you are not psychic, although you may have had limited previous strange experiences you could not explain rationally? Do you take a lot of convincing that the materialistic sceptics are not correct? If so, then this book is for you. Those who have natural spiritual awareness have no need of this book. Thousands of books have been written by mediums and psychics, and they believe in what they say, do, and think, but non-psychics, the majority, have to take their word for it. In life, the best way to learn is by “trying it out for yourself”. I began my spiritual search as a rational sceptic, who was an engineer and research technologist by profession, with no previous personal contact with the psychic or Spirit that I could recall. Twenty five years later, I had moved to a position of acceptance of the psychic and a Spirit World, by a steady accumulation of experiences and evidence from many sources, which in the end forced me to realise that it would be irrational and in fact cowardly to deny the conclusions. So all you genuine curious searchers out there, please join me on my journey. I have been called a doubter many times, but I doubt no longer. Your journey will be different and unique if you choose to take it, but I hope that my personal pathway will open up for you some of the opportunities available for personal development and growth, and knowledge of Spiritualism and it’s activities. My journey began as an open-minded sceptic, who visited a clairvoyant in 1985.

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Chapter 1: The search begins It all began with a reading from a clairvoyant, in 1985. I had taken my son, aged 6, toWeymouth on holiday, and I was rather bored and lonely one evening. As I strolled along the promenade, I saw a fortune- teller’s booth, with the name Lee Bennett on it. I felt strongly attracted to have my fortune told for the very first time, although intellectually I did not believe in the psychic. It was curious that so many stars and celebrities had posted up their testimonies about how accurate he had been with their readings. However, he was engaged for quite some time, and I almost gave up and went back to the hotel. Little did I know that my future life was hanging on a thread, for without the reading I would not have begun a search for Spirit. What would have happened instead I don’t know. We can all look at key points in our lives, and wonder whether it was meant to be, or just “ one thing after another”. When I entered, the cheapest reading was billed as palmistry, which I selected. Lee hardly looked at my hands, but talked for about twenty minutes with no feedback or questions to or from me. I was wearing casual clothes and jeans. “You have no heart and health problems, and can expect a long life. You have just been through a redundancy situation at work, but you survived it, and will be OK in the future. You are in the second division at work, but will have a chance before Autumn to get in to the first division. It’s up to you to decide if you are happy how you are, or accept an offer hard to refuse which would involve more responsibility. This will involve problems with communication and learning to express yourself more effectively. You have an air of spirituality about you, and you are capable of healing- not physical, but mental. You can help others who are mentally down. You’re a soft touch, you want to help lame ducks, and you can heal if you wanted to. You will survive, and it is up to you if you want to change. You seem very quiet, but you are a rebel inside and have a lot of inward aggression. You like company, but not all the time, you need lots of time to yourself. You are wanting speed now, but you are older now, and will have to accept a slower pace.” As I left, my head was spinning. I was trying to memorise accurately what he had said, while at the same time feeling shocked at the accuracy of the statements. I wrote it all down as soon as I reached my hotel, and could not stop thinking about where the information came from. It seemed too specific to be shrewd guesswork. As I left , I looked at the testimonies on the wall of many well-known personalities with their photos. . The clairvoyant obviously had “something” which enabled him to satisfy his clients with information he should not have known, and intrigue them, as had happened to me. It seemed too accurate to be pure chance. I wondered what were the mathematical odds that he would be correct by chance guesswork, and whether something similar happened to all the other clients. It surprised me that nothing was incorrect in the reading. Three statements seemed specific to me, others fitted my character, but the bit about healing meant nothing to me. I had lost several colleagues to redundancy only the previous month but had escaped it, and escaped redundancy also in later years.

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Before the Autumn, I was promoted at work and became a Project Leader. It meant a move from an advanced technician role to lower management. This involved delivering presentations to senior management and better communication skills. I had been a left- wing idealist socialist and active trade unionist in my younger days and did have a lot of inward aggression about politics, although appearing quiet on the outside. I had no health problems to speak of. (And up to the time of writing). I had been running competitively for some time, but my best times had already been achieved in races and I was forced to slow down. I did like lots of time to myself, although I did like company as well. This was nothing like a newspaper stars astrology column! After I returned home, my sister-in-law rang me, and said that she had heard that I was going to Weymouth on holiday. She had really hoped that I would go to see this clairvoyant while I was there. I did not know this, or that she had also seen him some time before. She said he had been 100% accurate in telling her of her past life, including facts about her divorce, her new husband, her mother’s blindness, and a socalled “spirit guide “ who was helping her. This was all strangely coincidental, especially as my sister-in-law had not been in touch with me for a long time and I did not know of her interest in the subject. At the time, I had heard of telepathy but knew little about it. Mind reading? Could my sisterin-law have influenced my mind from where she lived, 40 miles from my home, to visit the clairvoyant? Is that why I felt so strongly compelled to have my first reading? Did Lee Bennett read my mind to be able to give me the information? Was it scientifically possible? Were there unknown or unaccepted mechanisms at work for it to happen? Or was it all chance? Whatever it was, it caused me to begin reading up the subject. I learned about the difference between psychics and mediums, and I then realised that Lee Bennett must have been a medium, who claimed to communicate with the Spirit World, as well as a psychic. For about two years, I lived in a world of books about the paranormal, that is about many kinds of phenomena not accounted for by modern science, to try to find out how it all worked. It seemed that the paranormal was all subjective and connected to states of mind, rather than objective, which I was used to. As I had no reason to believe that I was psychic in any way, it seemed that this increasingly interesting subject would only be a sideline in my life. But then, an old friend learned of my interest, and told me what she knew about Spiritualism. She gave me some contacts who belonged to the “Christian Fellowship for Psychic and Spiritual Studies” , (CFPSS). . The Fellowship was an Ecumenical body of Christians founded in 1953, existing for the study of the wide reaches of the paranormal and extra sensory perception in their relation to the Christian Faith. The field of study included psychical phenomena, mysticism, meditation, spiritual healing, telepathy, clairvoyance, clairaudience, precognition, and psychokinesis. I was not a Christian, but was brought up as Methodist until the age of about 13, when I lost any belief in the dogmas of Christianity. I had no reason to believe that I had any psychic ability at all. However, the CFPSS provided a safe haven to begin my investigation. The psychic is often regarded as spooky or weird, perhaps even

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dangerous, so the fact that some committed Christians were sympathetic, and had various psychic abilities themselves, was reassuring. They met in a Friend’s Meeting House in Marlborough, and I began to attend their meetings. They were open to anyone interested. The first lecture was about Near Death Experiences, and evidence was presented that these experiences indicated survival of physical death. Later that year at the CFPSS, I was given the first of what turned out to be many messages from Spiritualist mediums. Ursula Roberts, a well-known old school medium, gave a demonstration of clairvoyance, and picked me out for a message purported to be from the Spirit World. It was from a tank driver, with light coloured hair, who died not in the War, but some time after. She could “see” the tank driving over sand. The tank driver told her that he belonged to the “ World Brotherhood for Peace” in the Spirit World, and he encouraged me to continue my interest in World Peace, and also to continue to study the psychic. I could only think of one person who might fit the message, my father-in-law, who I had never met but had been told he drove a tank in WW2. My wife confirmed that he did have light coloured hair, he drove a tank and took part in the Normandy beach landings, was a very peace loving man, and died in the late 1950’s. This message quite shocked me. It felt strange to think of my wife’s deceased father showing his identity to the medium, pointing out who to go to- (me) , knowing that I was studying the psychic, and belonging to a Peace organisation in the Spirit World. I was also strongly anti-war, and felt angry about it, as it happened. When the shock died down a bit, I began to rationalise the message, and went back in to my sceptical shell. Some messages fit by chance, I thought, and we ignore those which do not. Still, Ursula was one of the top professional mediums, with a good reputation. Ursula Roberts demonstrated again two years later, at the Meeting Place. I took the opportunity of having my first private reading with her. I had met her, and asked her how to tell when mediums are fraudulent. I still had a very scientific approach. She told me that I had a green aura around me, which meant to her that I had healing powers, particularly for nervy, distressed types. I was good at counselling, and listening to, those who were mentally distressed. Someone close to me had a cricked neck, and I should lay hands on to heal it. She saw a William, like a grandfather figure, with a book open on his lap. I began to see how it is possible to get drawn in to belief by making information fit yourself, and accepting advice or talents. For example, the Weymouth clairvoyant had told me something similar about me doing mental healing. A coincidence? Or do mediums say this to everybody I thought, to get them involved? And yes, I did have an uncle William, or Bill as he was known, and he had known that I was mad about books and reading when he knew me. As it happened, my wife did have a cricked neck at that time, and I laid my hands on and massaged it. It did improve quite quickly, but it may have been nothing to do with the Spirit World.

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The next month, I had the very rare experience for me of a vivid, remembered dream. I woke up suddenly in the middle of the night, in the middle or end of the dream. I had dreamt that I was a spirit being, looking down on my separated physical body. I had the absolute conviction in the dream that Spirit controlled the body, the physical brain and body did not control the mind. I remembered speaking the words for emphasis through the spirit form which was apparently “me”. At the time, I put this down to my subconscious mind sorting out my problem with the brain/mind relationship and telling me what it thought I wanted to hear. On the other hand, it could not be disproved that perhaps “something in the Spirit World” was trying to convince me of it’s reality. The medium, Stephen O’Brien, was advertised to demonstrate clairvoyance in the local area to a large audience in 1990. I decided to attend, to try to find out more about the claims of Spiritualism and evidence of life after death. He talked about the philosophy of the Spiritualist Movement, and gave ten messages to members of the audience. His method was to ask the whole audience to listen to him as he gave out information like names, places, events. A single person was then established who understood and accepted the information. Stephen claimed to act as a kind of “telephone exchange” for Spirit communicators. He talked to the recipient, who was supposed to answer with a yes or no, about information he claimed to be hearing from “the Spirit side of life”. The recipients seemed like ordinary people, not actors, and it seemed to be spontaneous. There was a lot of specific information given out, and most of it was apparently accepted. On the face of it, there seemed impressive evidence all evening that the medium was indeed passing on messages from the Spirit World to our physical world. However, my sceptical side was saying that the recipients were self-selected, therefore negating that part of the evidence. The evidence after the acceptance was not impressive enough to convince, particularly as the rest of the audience did not know what the evidence meant to the recipient. Later that year, the CFPSS hosted two spiritual healers, who gave healing to seven of our members. This kind of thing was new to me. How did they know that the healing “worked”, and how did it work anyway? After the healing, one of them went in to “trance” and explained how Spirit worked. Cause and effect rules, both here and in the Spirit World, re-incarnation can happen for “karma”, and we don’t control when we die, it is planned. This was the first time I had witnessed a trance address, when a Spirit communicator is supposed to speak through a medium who allows this to happen while his own spirit “stands aside”. Another experience of so-say working with Spirit, but I had no idea if any of it was valid, or if the healing had any effect. A later speaker at the CFPSS was a Christian cleric who was opposed to psychic research and investigation. He thought that the Devil and evil spirits were a reality, and it was best for natural psychics to control themselves and avoid opening themselves up to these bad entities. An open-minded sceptic should at least consider the possibility that, if there is a Spirit World,and “good spirits” can communicate, why should “bad spirits” be unable to? The type of evidence produced, and it’s effect on behaviour, good or bad, would provide a clue. Why would an evil spirit persuade us to lead a good life?

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I had become more and more sympathetic to the claims of Spiritualism, while not enjoying the theology which was introduced at some meetings of the CFPSS. I read pro-Spiritualist books more and more. By 1993, my mother and eldest brother had died. At a later CFPSS meeting, a local medium, Sheila Webb, demonstrated clairvoyance. She could not properly place a communicator who wanted a “Norman” on the earth plane, who was a scientist, there was a rift between brothers, the brother was sorry it had happened, he was sad about it. I did not speak up, as the medium tried with someone else with limited success. It fitted me perfectly. My name is Norman, I was a scientist, and my brother had disowned me and told me not to go to his funeral. I spoke to Sheila afterwards about it, and she said she wished that I had spoken up, so that she could have expanded the link. I did not want to be a “message-grabber” as some call it, I prefer the medium to come to me directly. I had never met Sheila before. In a group of about ten, what were the chances of one of them matching an unusual name, Norman, a fairly unusual occupation ,scientist, and a rift between brothers, probably unusual even if you have brothers. Could it have been mind reading again? If it was, it was still remarkable, and not accepted by mainstream science. By now, my reading and experiences had led me to believe that the psychic was well worth investigating, but I felt that it was essential to look inside the Spiritualist movement and take part, to ensure that all was what it seemed to be, and what mediums were like and how they trained. Most of the sceptics and de-bunkers criticised mediumship from the outside, without knowing, or taking note of, the full facts available. I had often thought of attending my local Spiritualist Church, but I was a little afraid, as other people’s attitudes do affect you. Colleagues might think you were a nutter or a crank, it might be creepy or dangerous, and some Christians thought that it was evil, and Satan was at work, diverting you from “the real faith”. The opportunity arose when a friend from work, who knew of my interest, invited me to go with her to the local Spiritualist Church to see an up-and –coming medium named Mark Brandist. The small Church was packed with nearly a hundred people, and Mark gave lots of correct names “from Spirit” to people he selected, together with descriptions of events and appearances. It was relaxed, humorous, and down-to-Earth, with a pleasant atmosphere. It was not what I had expected, as there was a prayer, and hymns were sung, but it was more cheerful than an orthodox type of Christian service. I felt a strong compulsion to attend the Church services on Saturday and Sunday each week for six months, and also try anything else going on there. I would be able to see a wide range of mediums, the quantity and quality of their message-giving, meet some of the Church regulars, and see how genuine it all seemed to a doubter like me. It was almost like a challenge to the Spirit World to prove it’s existence to me. I resolved not to divulge information about myself, and look at events with an open-minded, but critical and rational outlook.

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Chapter 2: Joining the Spiritualist Church A good start had been made in my search. Anyone, psychic or not, could have visited the clairvoyant, or attended the CFPSS meetings, or gone to a medium working in a public show, and gained interesting experiences, as I had. Or maybe I was just lucky. I had felt comfortable with the people I had met, and some had told me of their psychic experiences. I was now very curious, to find out what it was like to attend Spiritualist services. I knew it was a registered religion. Anybody could walk in to a service, paying a small fee for clairvoyance only, or free with a collection for Sunday Divine Services. As I entered Swindon Spiritualist Church (SSC) on July 3rd 1993 to attend my first service, I saw that Jeff Woodhouse was the medium, I felt alone and a little apprehensive. I would probably not know anybody, my wife strongly disapproved as she was a Christian fundamentalist, and I thought that I was a non-psychic. I sneaked unobtrusively up the path, hoping that nobody I knew would see me go in. Someone gave me a friendly handshake at the door, a hymnbook was given to me, and in I went, a Joe Bloggs off the street for six months. I sat down, and read the Seven Principles of Spiritualism on a poster on the wall. The Fatherhood of God The Brotherhood of Man Communion of spirits and Ministry of Angels Continued existence of the human soul Personal responsibility Compensation hereafter for all the good and evil done on Earth Eternal progress open to every human soul No sign of any evil there I thought. After an introduction, hymns, and a collection, Jeff began the mediumship. Some messages were accepted, but there was nothing very convincing. I felt at home however, and the service ended with a hymn and notices. It was quite like a Christian service, except that hymns were adapted towards Spiritualist principles, and the clairvoyance replaced a sermon. I wondered what I, or anyone else, had worried about. With about forty in the congregation, and five messages given, that was a one in eight chance of getting one yourself. If this service was average, in six months I would attend about fifty times, and might expect perhaps six messages on average, if all things were equal. The next day, Sunday, the service was longer and contained a philosophical address before the clairvoyance. Sylvia Charlewood at SSC gave the last message to me. It contained nothing significant, but I enjoyed the atmosphere, and looked forward to coming back again. I was given several messages during the six month trial period, mostly evidential, and one which I had no idea about. However, I thought it might fit an uncle I hardly knew when I was young. I was able to check it out with a cousin, the only one alive who could confirm the facts, and he said it was all true.

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Many messages followed, in this Church and other places, but these are chronicled in another book. I had to admit that Spirit had won my six month challenge. Or perhaps, instead, they had inspired me to ask for the challenge! One message, said to be from my mother, caused me extreme emotion. As the medium delivered about twelve facts, relating to my mother’s last years on Earth, I was answering yes each time, but rocking backwards and forwards in my chair in shock and surprise. I felt that she really knew this information was from mother, and I had a deep conviction that this was the personal evidence of survival that I had been seeking so long. A feeling of warmth and hope came over me. As usual, my sceptical side hit back. I knew all the information given by the medium, she could have read it from me, and fed it back. It was crazy to think of the possibility of “spirit people” queueing up in the Spirit World to pass messages through the medium. It was easier to believe in telepathy, now called extra sensory perception. On the other hand, had I felt the rare presence of Spirit inside me, and rejected it? There was no scientific or other evidence I was aware of to support that degree of telepathy in the message. Despite my remaining scepticism, my feelings and emotions had been aroused, and I had developed a hope, or semi-belief, in the reality of a spiritual, created Universe where everything had significance and meaning even if we do not recognise it. The Spiritualist philosophy I heard each week was very attractive to me, and I found myself increasingly trying to put it in to action in my everyday life. The Seven Principles fitted how I wished life was set up, and there was a progressive change in my ways of thinking. It was a strange feeling, to be almost a “believer”, but partly a sceptic. While attending the Devizes Road Spiritualist Church in 1993, I first experienced spiritual healing in the Church Healing Sanctuary. I had been suffering for some time upper respiratory infections in frequent cycles, which gave symptoms of tickly coughs, catarrh, raw chests, and sore throats. There is no medication effective for this disease, and the natural defences of the body is the only remedy against it. I had heard of “mind over matter” healing yourself, Christian faith-healing, Reiki healing, and other unorthodox healing methods, but I was curious about spiritual healing which I had recently heard about, and decided to try it out. I was slightly apprehensive, as I did not know what to expect, or how it worked. It might be spooky, in the small healing room. Were they “ calling up the Spirits” like in some Hollywood film? The Sanctuary was dimly lit, and soft soothing music was playing. As we waited to start, patients and healers seemed quite ordinary, and chatted normally. A prayer to the “Great Spirit” was spoken and healing commenced. I was seated on a low stool, and the healer explained what would happen, knowing it was my “first time”. He said that Spirit told him what to do, spiritual healers did not diagnose, and healing occurred by means of energy from Spirit, irrespective of any faith in it by the patient. As he started healing, he placed his hands first close to my chest, and stayed there a long time. This was interesting, because nobody else was treated with hands on chest that evening, and I found out that I was the only patient with a chest complaint. When he moved his hands close to my head, my head “tingled “ as though by a small current

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of electricity. My session lasted about twenty minutes, I waited for the others to be healed, and there was a closing prayer. It was very matter-of-fact and peaceful, and I wondered what I had been worried about. The next week, I was healed by a different healer. He also placed his hands close to my chest at first, and told me afterwards that he was guided to go there. I felt a warmth in my chest. Again I felt “tingles” as his hands went to my head. I was feeling slightly better now, but I heard that a special healing event was taking place at a venue in Swindon. At the event, a lady who told me she was named Maxine, from Glastonbury, was designated as my healer. She placed her hands on my chest, and I felt a tremendous heat pumping in to my chest. She also went to my side and face. She asked if I was having bad headaches, I said yes, perhaps it was the catarrh. She said check with your doctor to make sure you are alright physically. The following Monday, I felt so much better, the annoying cough had stopped, and my chest was no longer “raw”, that I thought I would see my doctor. He had prescribed the regular use of a nasal spray. He examined me, and was surprised that my chest was now clear. I told him that I had received spiritual healing, and he did not disapprove, but seemed quite interested. Although I now felt perfectly well, I went again for healing to thank them for their efforts. There was no charge for healing, unless you wish to make a donation for Church funds. I thought I would have a last session. My healer provided a different sensation this time. I felt cold , but relaxed. Afterwards, Margaret said she had sensed no illness in me at all. I was free of the illness for some years, and it was never as bad again. Another healer at the Church told me that a patient had come for healing, but asked her to be careful on his back, as he had a problem there. She healed him, then days later he came back and told her his story. He had suffered a very painful cyst on his back, he could not sleep properly, and doctors had told him that it had to be removed with an operation, which had been arranged. As a last resort he had received the healing, had felt less pain, then next day the cyst came off while he was in the shower, leaving no mark, he said. This was all extremely interesting to me, as I had felt effects from the healing, and this had coincided with a cure on this occasion. I began to read a lot about healing, and healers. I had been attending the Church for about six months, when an Open Circle started up at the Church, with a platform medium from the Church leading it. In early 1994, an Open Circle was set up in the Church, with medium Betty Pearce leading it. I knew next to nothing about Spiritualist development circles, but I thought it was an opportunity for me, a non-psychic, to try it out for myself, to see what happened.

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About thirty people turned up on the first night. We all sat round the medium and tried to relax, but it was exciting for newcomers. I gathered that the others felt they had various natural gifts. Betty explained that the psychic was a lot to do with intuition, also with many spiritual gifts and experiences, but it may not involve communication with the Spirit World. Mediums can do this. All mediums are psychic, but not all psychics are mediums. I presumed that I was the only rationally minded non-psychic there. I felt alone and out of place, as the others, mainly women, chatted about their personal experiences of mediumship. Betty told us how she worked with Spirit, and how to make links with the Spirit World and deliver messages from communicators there, to recipients in the circle.She opened the circle with a prayer for guidance and protection as is usual in circles. She asked several members to make links with the Spirit World. They seemed to enjoy trying to give messages from Spirit to members of the circle. This made me feel very ill at ease. When she asked me, I refused, saying I was not ready yet, I was here to learn, it was too early. At the next Open Circle, we were all asked to place a personal object in a basket, then in turn pick out one of the objects, and write down three things about it. This was called psychometry, the ability to tell something of the history of an object by simply holding it and seeing what comes to mind. I put in my signet ring, and picked out a bunch of keys. I felt nothing, but wrote down “red, living in the country or loving the country, and cottages.” When I read this out, and gave the keys back, it was to a man in a bright red sweater, he did live in the country, and cottages were around him. A man I did not know, named Rowland, had picked out my ring, and read out, “ the owner loves jogging, had a tight chest condition, Channel 4, and something about a hairstyle.” I had been jogging for many years, I had suffered tight chests in the past and it was a weakness, I watched Channel 4 quite a lot, and I was fairly bald! At the next Open Circle, besides doing psychometry, I had to attempt a Spirit link, after opening the meeting in prayer. This is how it went, after the meditation, when I had a few thoughts as to what to say. “ The name of Janet, a lady, pretty, long shiny black hair, and a largish nose.” To my surprise and shock, a lady named Jeannie claimed to understand it. Very nervously, eyes closed, I had to work with her. I said what came in to my mind. “ She was a very active person, played sport.” No. Betty said don’t assume, ask her how she passed over. “ She died in a car accident?” Yes Where did she live, ask them said Betty. “ She lived in… New York.” Yes. Ask her if she’s family, said Betty. “ She’s saying no, not family, a personal friend..” (Correct) Ask her what’s her reason for coming, said Betty. “ It’s O.K. over here, you will see for yourself one day, and she sends her love to you”. Jeannie seemed to think that I had given her a message from an old friend now in the Spirit World, and some others also seemed to think it was a “genuine”.

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I regarded it as a fluke. I had made up the information as I spoke, this was ridiculous, I was not a medium or psychic. Jeannie had an American accent. The rest was just a lucky fit, as far as I could tell. I told Betty afterwards that the words, and the picture, came in to my mind very distantly, and I did not know where it came from. It was not like what I imagined real mediums experienced, real Spirit voices, real Spirit forms, or real feelings given by discarnate Spirits. Despite my doubts, Betty invited me, and two others, to accompany her to attend a weekend course for mediumistic development at the Swansea National Centre for Spiritual Awareness.

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Chapter 3: The Swansea experience I was very reluctant to go to the Swansea Centre for the training course, but I had resolved to try out all that became available. The training medium, Betty, must have seen something in me that I did not think was there. I still did not feel that I was psychic, or mediumistic, that is, being able to communicate with the Spirit World people. Curiosity and my stubborn streak seemed to impel me onwards. Betty was very forceful, and had complete faith in what she was doing, despite her telling us that she did not see or hear Spirit. She had a strong friendship with the owner of the Centre, Dell Round, who we were told passionately believed that everybody could communicate with the Spirit World. As we travelled to Swansea, towards my first real spiritual training course, I began to feel that I shouldn’t really be doing this. The programme stated that it was all about psychic and spiritual awareness, and the students would have to work towards taking part in a full student Service at the end of the weekend of training. It had all happened too quickly and I felt some stress and pressure. When we arrived, we filled in Registration forms, and had to answer questions. Students were divided in to three groups: experienced mediums, fledgling mediums, and relative newcomers. Newcomers would only do psychometry in the Workshops. One question was, Have you ever made a link with the Spirit World? Betty advised me to answer “not sure”, rather than no. To my surprise and consternation, I was then grouped as a fledgling. We would be taught to “extend our our mediumship”. Extend? I hadn’t really started yet! Dell Round rounded up all the students in the main hall, and asked us to introduce ourselves. She then lectured from the platform on the theme “ Mediumship- More than a Message”. I had heard many spiritual talks by now in the Church, but this time I felt like taking notes for future reference. “ A medium is a channel for spirit people to give survival evidence. Messages are given from loved ones. Mediums teach philosophy, and their aim is to touch the soul. They should set an example to follow. They are educated towards a purpose, a lifetime’s service to Spirit. This means everything, no reservations. Changes in sensitivity demands a move away from some habits. A desire to withdraw from the world is felt. There are not many true mediums in the physical world. The students are not here by accident, the Higher Self has already agreed. All life is linked. Messages need linkage, if genuine you both feel it. If there is no awakening, the medium has not done his job. You must be honest to everyone about what you are, and why you do it. All of you have a team of people in the Spirit World helping you and fulfilling their purpose. The teaching of philosophy should be just as good as giving messages, working with the Spirit World. Get your inspirational link going. You have to be a medium to be a healer, you have to be open to Spirit. The whole point is to touch the soul, stimulating a thought to develop later, to show the Light. It is a way of life, through service, to be known through your Light. Your example should be one of Spirit, no ego-trips, but self-realisation. You need to understand your own motivation, there is a huge responsibility on you. You will find a need to be with others of like mind, you will have ups and downs, but you will grow.

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It denies a way of life you are used to. I have lost the ability to be angry now, and have gained greatly in confidence.” Jonathon John, the other main Centre leader, then lectured on “ Constructing a link – A programme for success”. “ In the delivery of messages, the mind gives an interpretation and can cause even a real message to go wrong. A medium sometimes tunes in to your auric field, and feeds information about you back to you. In this case, a communicator is not involved. You must get an initial communicator. You do not know what will come, as a medium. You wait to receive it as you talk. Learn to speak your way in to a link. Use the CERT formula. COMMUNICATOR: I have with me, someone here understands… EVIDENCE: Facts important to them, and you. He is talking about…. REASON: They have come for a reason. The spirits get frustrated, they cannot always get through. Exercise your inner knowing, on a human level, they share our lives. TIE UP LOOSE ENDS: Do not say take it away with you, the carrier bag syndrome. Practice saying the opening words, to prevent blockage, by saying for example A lady is speaking to me about…this draws information in to the awareness. The Spirit World touches our thoughts at some points, the rest is lost or we mix it with our own thoughts. Relate exactly what you receive, and no more. You link a Spirit communicator with a recipient by giving out information which is understood and accepted. Examples are name, occupation, residence, means of passing, disabilities, tie of relationship, and appearance. You should prime your mind and practice with your helpers in Spirit. It is organised from their side, with your Main Control. You all have a main control who is close to you although you are not aware of it usually. He teaches your communicator how to get through when you are here in the meeting. You give further evidence by talking about the communicator, for example he is speaking about a time when… The reason the communicator has come should be given. This will come to you as you are speaking. This finished the day at the Centre, so our group went to our hotel for a snack. We discussed our mediating for the next day. There were two Workshops, in each of which we had to do a link with Spirit, either in the experienced or fledgling group. Our medium was in the experienced group, and my two friends from our Church were with me in the fledglings. I felt envious of them, because of the fact that they felt they were psychic and mediumistic. I felt that my own mind had imagined my only link so far. There would have to be something special to convince me otherwise. I would have been quite happy to have been an observer of proceedings, but we all had to work, and it was quite intensive. It was fascinating, and now I was here I would continue to test out if there was a Spirit World in an open-minded but rational way. I allowed faith that it would work to replace scepticism in my mind, and practiced in my room at 11pm. I asked my main control, as if he was really there, to please supply two lady communicators, known to someone in the Workshop, for my two links the next day. This would give me a start if they obliged. I told him I would use the same formula

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each time, so that he, and the communicator, and myself, would all know what was coming next! I was used to experimentation, and liked the unorthodox. I said I would use the mnemonic NORM each time, standing for Name, Occupation, Residence, and means of passing. This way, when I was in panic on the platform, stuck for words, I would be able to try for a communicator with four specific pieces of information, the first essential. This seemed unlikely to fit one person out of about twelve in our group, so I could get off and watch the others! This arrangement with main control felt utterly bizarre to my conscious, analytical mind, but I told myself it was an experiment, I had nothing to lose. I had felt an atmosphere of power and purpose within the Centre, which might help. Next morning, a medium led a guided meditation. We had to visualise climbing up twenty wooden steps, then descend one by one. This worked for me, as I can see in my mind’s eye quite well. Then we imagined a rainbow, and I stepped through the colours to the green, in different shades. I was calm and still, but sent out a thought to my main control, Do you accept my method of communication NORM? I felt that this was agreed somehow, then I saw purple clouds or a smoke effect in my inner vision, as though to give a signal. I was not used to meditation at that time, so all this surprised me. A lecture by Jonathon John followed, and it was soon time for the first Workshop, led by Dell Round herself, with ten students and two staff members watching. We were all required one by one to mount the platform in the large hall, and make a link between the Spirit World and someone in the hall. Several students seemed to enjoy going up and making links, then it was my turn. I was nervous of course, but was determined to trust my method and try it out. “ I have with me a lady giving the name of ”….A second of desperation, then I blurted out “Phyllis.” “This lady is telling me that… she did office work before she retired” “ She says that she lived in the Swansea area, or Neath” “ She tells me that…she died of natural causes”. “Who understands this lady please? To my utter surprise, a hand went up at the back of the hall, and a man who was on the staff there said he understood it all. I had not prepared further than this, but ploughed on. “ She is saying that…. She liked sport”. Watching it, not playing. I lost it then, saying , “Her reason for coming is…..” There was nothing, but I said “To prove to us that the main control really works to help us.” This was my intellectual self coming back I think, and I saw a gentle smile on the face of Dell Round. The words at the end of the patter had come in to my mind somehow, but very distantly, and not distinguishable from random thoughts. After lunch, I prepared with my main control for the second link. I asked for more information this time, and Gladys was in charge, in a smaller room. “ I have with me a lady giving the name of….Janet.” She is telling me she was a….sewing machinist”. “She is telling me that she lived in England, not Wales.”

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“ She is also telling me that she passed over with a stomach condition” “Who understands this lady please?” Oh no! A lady named Annette, a Welsh student, accepted all of the information. I had to go on. “ She tells me that….she passed over quite young, and was not close family” . Yes, I know her. “ She is saying that….you discussed this sort of thing when she was on Earth?” Yes, she was not a believer in it. “ Her message is….that it is real, she is there in Spirit, and she sends her love to encourage you to go on”. I was pleased to be able to discuss it later with Annette. She said she took it to be her mother’s sister, who used to work a sewing machine for a living, lived in England, and passed with stomach cancer. I said only Janet did not fit then? She said I could have misheard, as it is close in sound to Annette. I can’t make it fit I said, as a joke. After more successful links, the students were called back to the main hall to question Dell and Jonathon. Then Dell spoke to us. “ Spirit is energy force, it unites with everything else. The vehicle for Spirit is the soul. As the soul absorbs more knowledge of Spirit, there is greater understanding. You have to make your own relationship with your main control. Give him your time. He normally remains distant, they are beyond romantic or affectionate. We can feel discomfort, because we want an emotional response. Emotion can be counterproductive. Many mediums are psychic. They go from side to side, and ask if anyone has not had a message before, then giving one. These are all psychic readings. My dream is for ALL to talk to Spirit, not just special people. The last event that day was a demonstration of psychic art, by Jonathon John, and clairvoyance by Dell. She said, that the drawing and clairvoyance should go together for the same recipient. Jonathon had a rapport with an artist in Spirit, and cannot see what he is drawing, but he is guided. He does not draw for pleasure, only for this work with Spirit. Dell gave four good messages with drawings for students, then off we went to the hotel for a drink and discussion about the day. At midnight, I spoke to my main control, and gave him the name of George. I thanked him for doing such a good job that day. This seems insane when I look back, as I was such a doubter then, but I had suspended disbelief for a while. I pondered about my links that day. After each prepared phrase, I had waited for something to come in my head. It seemed to have worked so far. I began to feel emotional and tearful as I talked to George. I felt quite stressed, and would have loved to go home, I had had enough! But I was stuck, there was no way out with honour! I asked main control to please supply two Spirit men tomorrow, known to someone in the audience. Surely I would not succeed again? Sunday began with a meditation. I again felt a great peace and stillness, and I asked main control for his help again at the right time. I began weeping, and thought what is

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happening to me, this is not good, like a psychological breakdown. I saw purple clouds by my inner vision, then it all changed to blue. We were called back, and my neighbour had been weeping also. We discussed it and I was a bit shame-faced to admit the same and about the colours. She then said that she saw purple and then blue colours in flashes before she went to sleep last night. She associated this somehow with Jonathon John. Dell then gave another lecture about good mediumship, and said she was not a Spiritualist, she does not like any label. We then had a last preparation for the public student Service. This was on the platform again, ten students. My turn came round. “ I have with me a gentleman who is giving the name of….David, and Thomas.” “He is telling me that…..he worked in mining”. “ He is saying that…he passed over with a chest condition.” “He lived in …Wales”. “Who understands this man please?” Three people could take the names, but only Dell understood the information. Oh no, I had to work with the Boss of the Centre! “He is talking about…picnics together”. Not me, but I understand it. “He is giving me…coalmining” No, she said. I blundered on, eyes closed which was my bad habit, when I “saw” some trees and thought of forest. “ Do you understand a forest in connection with this man?” Yes, ( with a smile). Time was up , I could not get a reason for coming, and said so. Afterwards, Dell said I should open my eyes, and his name was Mr Colman. She used to go to a forest with this man when young. I was really apprehensive about the Student Service. It was a large hall, lots of the public would be present as well as the students and staff, and this non-psychic would try to give a message from Spirit. It was bizarre that I ever got in to this! I was looking forward to getting it over with. The last events, especially the table tilt, looked very interesting, and we would be relaxed and relieved.

Chapter 4: A big climax

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We students went to lunch, keyed up but determined to perform well. I made a last minute request to my main control to put a name in my mind before we started, to give me a good start. A slight change to the plan. The Student Service was organised in to four groups, each of which had a Chairman, a speaker, five psychometrists, and five mediums. I was told that I would speak in Group1, and mediate in Group 4 at the end. It was daunting to mount the stage platform as a Group and sit down, facing a sea of expectant faces. Well, about 50 anyway! I was used to doing presentations at work so I was not worried about speaking from the platform. The Chairman introduced me to open proceedings with a talk. I spoke about entering a Spiritualist Church for the first time, and it flowed well although I was unprepared. I then witnessed a series of perhaps surprisingly good talks, psychometry, and links to Spirit. We “mediums” had been asked to place personal items in to a basket, and the psychometrists had selected from them what they wanted to work with, not knowing the source. Coincidentally, my signet ring was held up for recognition by the lady who had meditated next to me that morning, and wept together. She said to me “she felt peace, calm, and gentleness with this ring. She felt a connection with a piano, nice shiny wood. A skipping rope, with girls around.” I replied I had played a shiny-wooded piano while wearing that ring. I did skipping with girls when I was young, but there was no connection to the ring. Mine was the last mediation. The name Thomas had come to mind while I waited, and I resolved to use it. I stepped forward for my big moment. “ The name of Thomas keeps coming to me. I don’t know if this is a surname or Christian name. I feel that he is a patriotic Welshman. Who understands this gentleman please?” Four hands went up. “ Thank you, this man is telling me he used to work in …..engineering”. Only one lady could take this, and she said he had been a manager in an engineering company. I was shocked once again. She was near the back, so it was difficult to hear, and I had no feeling to help me. “ He is telling me that he …passed over quickly”. Yes, in the end. He was my husband. “ He is telling me that… he found it difficult to express his love when he was with you.” He was reserved. The lady began to cry. I felt awful. This mediumship was an awesome responsibility, and I felt totally unsuited, untrained, unbelieving, and ashamed. I hurriedly tied it up before I did any damage. “All he is saying, he is giving it now, he is making up for it, take his love. Thankyou” This was a very unsettling experience. There had been a clash between faith and belief, and the rational. Most of the links by the mediums during the Service had been quite successful, but had not produced tears in recipients. Not one of the many messages offered out during the course fitted anyone I knew in the Spirit World, so this indicated that they were not so generalised that they would fit most people. At last the mediumship was over, and I had learned some interesting lessons.

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The next session was entitled “ A healing experience and celebration of life”. The hall was cleared, and chairs placed around the side. Jonathon , a very good musician, was on his keyboard and got us dancing to warm us up. He then organised us in to two circles, facing each other. Dell asked us to hold hands with the person facing us, and said when the music starts sing to each other, looking in to each other’s eyes. We were all reluctant at the start, and the young lady with me looked away. We had to sing, “ I give my love, I give my love, be not afraid”. Repeated. Then “ I give my joy, I give my joy, be not afraid”. Repeat. “ I give my peace, I give my peace, be not afraid”. These phrases were continuously repeated. As we became used to singing, and changing partners after each phrase, we gradually opened up, and I felt the emotions rising up around me. It was very unusual and disconcerting to look in the eyes of another person, and give your spiritual love. Some were crying, some were joyous. It was very powerful. I tried to project my positive feelings to my partners, as I guessed this would be part of the healing experience. A Divine Service followed, led by Dell. It was good to relax. The final event was a table tilt. It was described by Dell as a bit of fun, but for me it turned out to be a really incredible experience. Magical might be the word. I had heard about physical phenomena. These were said to be paranormal activities which were objective, in that more than one person could witness the phenomena at the same time, and could therefore compare notes for evidence. Table tilting, or table turning, came in to this category. At the Centre, an ordinary kitchen table, with metal legs, was placed in the middle of the hall, which was carpeted. Lighting was good, provided by red-coloured bulbs. Mediums from the Centre, and some others selected for their “energy”, stood around the table and placed their hands flat on it’s edges. Jonathon John began playing rousing songs on his keyboard, and the rest of us students, about sixty in all, who were seated around the hall, sang “ to raise the vibrations” as they say. We were encouraged to clap our hands as well, and soon the table was seen to move, a little at first. Sceptics and newcomers were looking for tricks, mechanical devices, pushing by some method, and any other normal explanation for the movement, but we could only see the hands on the top. I had inspected the table beforehand, and had stayed watching it until the tilt began. There was nothing abnormal to account for any movement. Only the hands on the top could possibly be moving the table. As we became excited, and clapped, making more and more noise, the table rocked quite violently, then slid quickly down the length of the hall, causing the mediums to have to run to keep up. The table swivelled round near the end of the room, causing someone to fall over as it changed direction. I saw no signs that hands were pushing the table. This went on for some time. In twos and threes, everybody who wanted to was invited to take part, replacing some of those at the table. When my turn came, I watched very carefully, but all hands were only on the table top. No leverage to slide or rock the table seemed possible. I tried to “cheat”, by using my muscular action to stop the table moving, but it seemed to just go it’s own way, with power behind it. My hands were pushed up although I was pushing down hard, the table rocked, then it would swivel on one leg, then slide quickly down the room

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again. I had to run with it to keep my hands on it’s top. All this was quite shocking to my scientific, rational mind. It should not have happened, by the laws of physics. There was no “normal” explanation. I could only speculate that whatever “energy” had been generated by the singing and excitement, and the mediums, had been converted to some kind of physical, but unseen and unknown, power. This had moved the table in a purposeful way. When all had taken part, and things had settled down a little, the mediums sat around the table with only their hands on it. We could clearly see every movement they made. In response to questions, the table rocked once for “yes”, and twice for “no”. A message was given, allegedly from Spirit, by the table tilting a number of times to correspond with a letter of the alphabet. One tilt meant A, 26 tilts meant Z, and so on. The table tilted each time about 12 inches upwards, and gently down again. This was repeated until a letter was completed, then there was a pause before the next letter was tilted out. Eventually, a meaningful message was completed in this way, and was understood and accepted by one of the mediums. Did this message by tilting mean that spirit people were intelligently communicating, after controlling, earlier, the very spectacular table tilt which I could not explain? Or was there a form of energy, hidden to science at the moment, and only available under certain conditions, which had been provided today, which could move tables about, and tilt out a message when asked? All this seemed impossible, but it happened, and I had to accept what happened. I thought that I would like to take part in another tilt one day, where I was involved in setting up the conditions. I would like to see all hands to be completely off the table, and the tilting continue, although I was sure that this tilt was 100% genuine. I now believed that there must be a relationship between our physical world, and an undefined energy connected with “ the psychic” which could move tables. This was tangible and real. The Spirit World may, or may not, be involved. I had read that ectoplasm may be involved in table tilting. Dell Round had her dream, that everyone could communicate with Spirit, not just “special people”. Her Centre had certainly done it’s best to realise that dream.

Chapter 5: Down to Earth We drove home, all on a spiritual “high”. So much had happened, so quickly. For several days afterwards I was walking on air as they say, and found it difficult to stop talking about the Course at my workplace, to a few who were interested. After I told

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them about the wonder of the table tilt, they confided to me some of their own psychic experiences, which they normally kept hidden. I then attended a one-day Workshop at the Church, called “ The Spiritual Approach to Life”, and this included lectures, spiritual advice, and psychic exercises which we tried out on each other. I made notes to refer back to, but nothing special emerged during the Workshop. I faced a decision about mediumship training. I could not see how my curiosity and personal development could be satisfied if I gave up the Open Circle. Although I disliked making links, felt unsuited to it, and had felt unequal to the responsibility, it was the only way to learn more at the moment. So on I went. I asked my main control to please supply a lady communicator at the next Open Circle. I did not know whether Spirit still wanted to give me more evidence, or every link had been a fluke so far, and I could give it all up. About fifteen people attended, and during a meditation I kept thinking of a bed, and I saw an old-fashioned ironframed bed with brass fittings in my mind’s eye. I was asked to link with Spirit. “ I have with me a lady who is giving the name of….Harriet.” “ I kept thinking of a bed with brass knobs, connected with this lady”. “She is telling me her occupation was….housework, something like that.” “ She lived in, or had links, with the…. South Coast area”. “ She tells me that she passed over with….a chest condition”. “Who understands all, or any, of this information please?” I sat back, surely nobody could relate to all this! But no, a man and a woman both put their hands up and could take all of it! I had been taught to ask for more to sort out the correct recipient, and said, “ She is telling me that she was….mother of one of you.” The man could not take this, but the lady was doubtful, as it was not her mother. She asked the training medium, Betty, for advice, and she asked me to rephrase what I had said. “ Can you understand why I said it was a mother connection?” Yes, she replied. She tells me that… you did not know her very well, but you do think about her. She gives you her love, and says keep thinking about her, she will send her thoughts back.” The recipient was new to the Circle, we had just met, but I asked her later to confirm the facts. She said that Harriet was the name of her great-grandmother, who had died in an ornate brass-knobbed bed in her presence, when she was only seven. She could not remember much else. She had passed with pneumonia. She worked in service for part of her life. She had moved to Somerset, and had links with Devon and Cornwall. Judging by accuracy , it seemed that either I had been extremely lucky, or Spirit had been behind this message and the ones I delivered at Swansea. But I did not want to be a medium, and could never do it! Then, Betty asked me to join her own private closed circle. I said I was honoured to be asked, but I lack faith in , and it felt unnatural for me. She said the others had agreed I would suit them. I decided to consult a local medium for guidance. I asked her where I could go next on my spiritual search, and about my doubts concerning mediumship and the methods. She said that she was sure that I was a healer by listening, caring, and

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counselling those who were mentally down. She could read my aura. My strength was lecturing on spiritual matters, it’s what I’d do best. I was being used by Spirit for my scientific approach, to explain, and give credibility, to the Spiritualist Movement. She said that my links so far had been genuine, but I could not always rely on getting so much. She saw a guide with me, he looked like a Jesuit priest. Her circle was very interested in scientific explanations of the spiritual, as you are. I took up the challenge of joining Betty’s circle. To my surprise, every week I had my links accepted. I felt very compatible with Cindy, who felt easy about message giving and read Tarot Cards for clients, but was quite sceptical about the reality of it all in when she was not working. Soon after, our medium Betty arranged for her circle members to sit privately with a developing physical medium. The medium arrived with two ladies, who sat with him when he tranced and produced phenomena in the cabinet. This was a tubular frame with a fabric draped over it to cover all sides but the front. This was said to hold and concentrate the ectoplasm, said to be a special material acting as a link between the Spirit and and physical worlds. Spirits are said to be able to use this material to move objects, and produce various other paranormal effects. It is mostly supplied by physical mediums, who are very rare in the population, and a little from the sitters. It is said to be destroyed by white light, which is why darkness or coloured light must be used. The medium sat in the structure, a dim red light was turned on in the cabinet, and the room lights turned off. He went in to the deep trance state, then his face became contorted, his lips curled, and a commanding voice spoke out through him. This was said to be a guide named Karl, who had been a Prussian while on Earth. He tried out some experiments with us. He said, “We are trying to change the energy in the room, you will notice it becoming hotter or colder.” I had felt a coolness before this, and others had, but I would have brought a thermometer to check if I had known this would be done. He asked us to sing to raise more energy, and asked for a volunteer, who was asked to sip a glass of water . The water was returned, and the medium made some hnd movements over it. He handed it back for tasting again, and the volunteer said it left a dry taste in his mouth this time. This was repeated, and it tasted even drier this time, according to the volunteer. Next, a lady in the circle was asked to think of an aroma, and those on the spirit side would pick up the thought, and try to send out the aroma to us. The “ instrument’s” hands made some complicated movements, and to my surprise I saw white, misty, lacy looking stuff, moving about under the hands. The lady had selected coffee, and had smelled it, but not all did. This was repeated for a flowery smell, and a lady closest smelled a sweet, flowery smell, and I think I did also. The final experiment began with Karl saying he was going in to deeper trance, and suddenly a lady noticed a bright glow around the medium’s neck, just below the top button. She excitedly pointed this out, and the golden glow moved above his shirt top, in a band about one inch in depth, all around his neck. After a time, the glow subsided, so that we could see the medium’s normal appearance in the good red light. Then the glow built up again as before. A few words were spoken which could not be understood, and our medium, Betty, exclaimed that her hair suddenly felt wet. The voice through the medium mumbled something like “used to touch your hair” and “sweet toffees”. Betty, our medium, said she understood this.

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The physical medium came back out of trance after the one and a half hours sitiing, and claimed he remembered nothing about what went on. It was not him, he had been taken over. He was told what had happened, then opened up his shirt and jokingly said to me, “ There’s nothing inside, no torches, no batteries!” Someone else said, “ You’re the scientist, what do you make of that?” , in great glee. Nothing! The medium explained that the aromas were “materialised”, using the white stuff I had seen, which was ectoplasm. The glowing was energy used by Spirit, to help build a “voicebox” through which Spirit could speak to the physical world. He was developing at Arthur Findlay College, and had taken part in ectoplasmic experiments before. Of course, I analysed and re-analysed all that had happened, to see if fraud or deception or natural occurrences could account for events, but no. It was paranormal as far as I could tell. So far, everything that I had investigated had shown that Spirit could well be involved. How could it have happened without Spirit? A good question. As the weeks went by, the message-giving continued, surprisingly successfully. There followed one of the strange experiences which seem to happen when one investigates the psychic. In the night, after one of the sittings, I woke up in the early hours, to see my wife at the bedroom window, looking out. I thought, that’s odd, she normally sleeps like a log. I went back to sleep. In the morning, she told me that she had had a vivid dream which woke her up. She then saw “lights” moving around the window. They were golden or orange in colour, and were like a flashing torchlight, or flickering flames. She got out of bed and looked out, thinking the shed could be on fire or something like that. There was nothing outside to cause this effect, but the “lights” remained round the window. Then she saw a “black shape” out of the corner of her eye, waving around above the bed. She insisted she had been wide awake, not dreaming or imagining. She disapproved of anything psychic or spiritual, so I believed her story. I was surprised she had not woken me up, or been frightened by it, bearing in mind she thought that spirit activity “is of the Devil”, and this might have been to do with Spirit. She had only felt a little perturbed, but had watched it for a while before drifting back to sleep. The following evening, my wife asked me to “take the lights away”. I said that she didn’t believe in the Spirit World, so what was there for you to worry about. However, she insisted that I should “pray” to them because I did believe in Spirit, and she did not want them in the house any more. I then agreed, although it was bizarre, to be talking to lights, as though they were alive. I said, “ Thank you for coming. We acknowledge your presence, but we ask you with love to go and not come back, because my wife is disturbed by your presence, and you have made your point. Thank you. Amen.”

In July 1994, Cindy and her husband had to leave the closed circle “on hold” because her husband had to work evenings now. Two other members were ill as well and could not attend, and another man left. I decided my attendance would be “on hold” as well, until the circle built up again perhaps. I was rather relieved, not to have to make links any more. It was not for me. I had developed a good friendship with Cindy by now,

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and she had a big influence on my future. She had given me an interesting private reading with Tarot cards in June. I had been impressed when she worked as a medium at a spiritual get-together locally, giving messages at least as evidential as those I’d heard from regular platform mediums. The Church had organised a spiritual week at Arthur Findlay College at Stansted on November 4th, and I decided to go, with Margaret, a friend I had met in the Open Circle. It was a chance to learn even more, hopefully in other areas. There were many interesting experiences there. Surprisingly, I felt a very heavy depression about the place, but put it down to me being a bit depressed and worried about my marital relationship. I had a reading from Mary Duffy, who gave me much interesting information, including that a lady with a name like Sandy, an unusual name, was going to share a great deal with me, having a lot in common. I hoped that this referred to Cindy. Then there was a message given to me by a student, unknown to me, who gave me an evidential message which included a prediction that I would divorce, and meet someone else from the Church. I had been strongly thinking of divorce at that time, as I was very incompatible with my wife. I met a group from Wales, and they invited me to sit with them for a circle. One of them told me that she had seen and known very definite spirit forms, and had absolute faith. When we began the circle, she sat on a bed opposite me and she looked radiant to me in a soft light. Then I saw a globe of light above and around her head. This was new to me and it was intriguing. I gave a message to her friend, which appeared to relate to a son she had lost seven months ago. This was sad and upsetting of course. Then I had a Chinese Face reading, and was told I was an old soul who had lived many lives before, and had a wisdom bump, which meant lots of knowledge. A medium took a table tilting session, but although it seemed to work using a small table, it was not very convincing, with all hands on and able to influence the limited movement. When I returned home, my wife told me that on the day I left for Stansted, there was an awful depression in the house after I left. During the next night, she woke up, and “felt” someone pull back the duvet cover, give a sigh, and get in to bed behind her. She was petrified by this, and was afraid to turn round. She felt like leaving the house, and selling up. I did not know what the Spirit World wanted me to do next, or where my search would lead. I had been told several times I could do healing, but I did not know how to go about it, or whether I could do it anyway. Physical mediumship was very attractive also. I had seen table tilts, and the physical medium demonstration. It was almost like starting again. Many lessons had been learned. As it happened, the next Church Discussion meeting was on the subject of “Back to Basics”. I thought this was very appropriate! Chapter 6: Back to Basics The Church Discussion Meeting was led by Tom, a Church Committee member and healer. He had also taken the training course at the Arthur Findlay College, and Back to Basics had been one of the lecture subjects. The attendees were myself, Audrey from Essex who was staying in the area, and Moya and Louise, mother and daughter.

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Tom went through the history and basics of Spiritualism, because Moya and Louise were very new to Spiritualism and knew little about it. In the discussion, we talked about the quality of mediums. Audrey, who knew a lot about Spiritualism, remarked how brilliant a medium named Joe Benjamin had been when she saw him demonstrate at the Alliance Hall in London. He had given out names and addresses and other hard evidence. I had never heard of him, but, coincidentally, Mary Duffy in a reading had told me that Joe Benjamin was with me, helping me from Spirit. Moya said she sees, with her eyes open, a Red Indian in front of her, and they “talk” to each other. She also sees an Egyptian, and a medicine man. She has “left her body” and gone to another place she can describe. She had not read books about Spirit, or been influenced by previous knowledge of Spirit, as far as I could find out by questions. I felt very excited to meet Moya, because she seemed to perhaps have good personal contact with guides and helpers. I said to Moya that she was very fortunate to have this natural ability. Tom said that she should keep her feet on the ground, it is very difficult to develop these days as few mediums are available, but perhaps join the Open Circle. I told her how powerful a circle is, which she knew nothing about, and said I’d love to hear more about her awareness, and tell you about my pathway. Next morning I woke up very early, with thoughts and hopes for a meditation circle with Moya, and her husband, who she had told me was fully supportive. Could it be? Meditation does not need an experienced medium to lead it, and my previous meditations had been interesting and brought a different awareness. I had felt very compatible with Moya, and she said she was searching as well. I felt like going for it, but it was a big test. Was it outside of my capabilities? What if Spirit came in and joined us? Could I control things? I was not a medium and would not see or hear Spirits. I later consulted Cindy and others for their opinions. They supported me, although one said what would you do if she tranced? When we met in the Church again , her husband was with her, and I sat by them. I was given a message, part of which told me I was inhibited, they were not pleased I was holding back, and I should unfold as a free spirit. You know what you should be doing, but you’re not doing it! I liked them both, and wondered if this message was a “prod” from Spirit. I suggested that we meet to discuss things. The next Tuesday we met, and it was agreed to have a meditation circle, just the three of us. Moya said that her guide had told her to develop and be patient. Her father had talked to her after his death. Her mother had died ten weeks ago, and she had seen and spoken to her. Her mother had said listen to your guide, do that which will make you happy. They insisted that I tell them how I thought we should proceed. I was reluctant, but I said play a guided tape, in their house, must be undisturbed, prayers for protection, some philosophy. Spirit might come in, we don’t know. Moya said she would like to do it, and her husband said, “ Let’s give it a crack!” Next Tuesday was arranged. Next day,I woke up early again, with my head full of thoughts about the meditation circle. Rules, how it should be run, prayers, and the tape. I typed it up ready for our first circle, and tried out the visualisation tape, Crystal Castle. I followed the journey, but then I felt an intense tickly feeling and itching all over my face and forehead, and

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it moves around. I had never experienced anything like this. Was it an encouragement, was it Spirit drawing near to me? Was it a hint about a physical circle, or ectoplasm? We thought that Spirit might be present when we meditated, but we would have an open mind. I rang my mentor Cindy, about the itchy feelings during the meditation. She said it happens to her, Spirit is drawing near, to let you know it’s O K. She also gets a mass, with her eyes open, with lights and colours in it, when she meditates. You cannot limit Spirit, they have been waiting a long time, they will decide what happens. You can do it, she is envious, Spirit will not give you anything you cannot handle. I said that I had missed her since we left the circle. I wished she was with us helping, but she preferred meditating on her own. She said she would like to, as she took to Moya when they met, but the guide of Moya may say no. When you are underway, I would like to be kept informed. I had been taught that everything spiritual begins with meditation, and it had always been used in religions to gain a different awareness. I had done very little meditaion so far, but had rushed in to development using it as a sort of sideline. Our meditations then started. Moya and her husband Phil agreed with my “Rules”. I opened in prayer, and took us through a personal protection routine. The visualisation tape was played, as I watched them sitting quietly. It was their first ever meditation as a group. After the tape finished, I asked them to stay in meditation until I asked them to come back ten minutes later. I then asked them how they had followed the journey, and if anything had come to them during the ten minutes afterwards. Moya had followed it very well, and had some impressions after, which we talked about. Phil partly visualised the journey. We then talked about our feelings about it, which is obviously private and personal. Prospects seemed exciting. I had felt very relaxed, in a calm, peaceful, loving state of mind. There was a lovely atmosphere. I had felt my right ear tingle, go cold, and feel “dead”, then there was a tickly feeling all over my face, as though something was crawling around. I wondered if this was my unknown spirit guide coming close to help me, whether it was caused by a Universal energy I had read about, or just my nervous system reacting to events. I also wondered how these sensations related to those experienced during spiritual healing. Anyone can meditate, psychic or not. Anyone can mediate with others. But it is very basic to development, if that is your choice. Our meditations continued every week, and Moya and Phil became good friends. We got to know each other well and confided in each other on a personal level. We felt that trust which means that anything could be discussed. Cindy was also a confidant, and we had long telephone conversations about spiritual and personal matters. She questioned everything about Spiritualism, and often was very sceptical, but she had many personal experiences which she could not explain. She was annoyed that she could not get answers to her many questions. In fact, she was rather like me in outlook. She had already given me a very good Tarot reading, but I asked her for another reading.

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Again, it was very interesting, with survival evidence, but Cindy had asked Spirit for something different and special this time, as she now knew me very well, and I needed evidence of Survival unknown to her. Part of her reading went: “ I am given a book, Cold Comfort Farm, If you read it, you will find something very relevant to your life in it.” I decided this was worth researching. I had not heard of the book, and neither had Cindy, whose honesty I trusted. This phrase seemed to trigger off a string of very strange coincidences, or was Spirit behind it? Again, the ambiguity which is often found in the psychic. I found that there was a book of that name, by Stella Gibbons. It was published in 1932, and was described as the comic classic of rural life. When I bought a copy and read it through, on page 25 there was a section of a paragraph which seemed out of context with the theme of the book, which had nothing to do with the psychic. “ Perhaps Flora would not mind using the large attic, which was now used as a meeting-room for the Orient-Star-in-the- West Society on Tuesdays, and for the Spiritist Investigator’s League on Fridays. She hoped that Flora was not a sceptic, for manifestations sometimes occurred in the attic, and even a trace of scepticism in the atmosphere of the room spoiled the conditions, and prevented phenomena, the observations of which provided the Society with such valuable evidence in favour of Survival.” I was a sceptic, I was an investigator in to Spirit, and I was sitting in circle on Friday evenings at the time. I was thinking of getting involved in physical mediumship. This really made me think. Assume that Cindy had never heard of, or read, the book Cold Comfort Farm, and assume that she just happened to invent the book title which actually happened to exist. The next coincidence was the passage which clearly stood out as special for me. So, an imagined book, and a lucky significance, for my evidence of Survival. There was more to come. A little later, Cindy selected some novels at random at the Library, and found, to her astonishment, that one of them was about a television company which went to the West Country to film… ‘Cold Comfort Farm’ . It further so happened that when Cindy and her husband visited me on New Year’s Day, a T.V. film of Cold Comfort Farm was screened. Two years later my divorce was completed, and I told the story to my new wife. Oh, she said, the producer of that TV film was a schoolfriend, Alison Gilbey, and she actually wrote to me to tell me it was on, beforehand. Later, we just happened to bump in to Alison Gilbey in Tescos, when she was visiting Swindon. What was behind all this? Pure coincidence? Synchronicity? Psychic precognition? Or could it really have been people in the Spirit World, impressing Cindy to speak the message, which meant nothing to her? They knew that I would read the book, which they had pre-selected because of the phrase which made me think. They can see a little ahead at times, and knew they could impress Cindy to select the book at the Library, that the book was going to be filmed for TV, and that I would meet and marry Joanna, a friend of the producer. Which is the most likely explanation? It was still ambiguous, as precognition is hard to accept, but even if later events were coincidental, that does not explain why Cindy gave me the book title, in the context of trying to prove Survival to me via a reading, and the topic of Survival was in the book.

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I felt that somehow I was destined to help and support Cindy, she would help me in return, and we would always be friends. I told a few selected colleagues how good and accurate Cindy was with readings, and since then at least ten people have had readings with her, that pleased them, as far as I could tell. The group meditations continued, until one week Moya became concerned that Phil might be going in to trance. He had breathed heavily , and seemed to fall asleep. Moya had opened her eyes, and gently prodded him to wake him up. She was concerned that Spirit were trying him out for trance, and doubted our competence to deal with it. Halfway through the tape, I had felt strong tingles on my scalp, my hair seemed to rise, then later my forehead, then my face all over side to side, became very tickly and itchy. Moya said she wanted to sample all the experiences available in Spiritualism, compare experiences with others, and find out what it was like to be in a Circle. I offered to go with them to the Church Open Circle, to see if they liked it. Although they were newcomers, and had never made links before, Betty made them do links, and both succeeded in placing communicators to Betty’s satisfaction. The following week, when I rang Cindy about Tarot readings, she seemed negative and fed up, didn’t feel like going to Church any more, and nobody likes her. . I tried to cheer her up I knew that she suffered from agrophobia, and minor depressions occasionally. I reminded her of all those in the Church who thought a lot of her, including me. She said that she hadn’t missed being in a circle at first, but lately she had thought it was the right time to start again. As she said this, she felt hot and tingly, and said that she would like to have a “spiritual evening group” at her house. She asked me if I would ask Moya and Phil to join, and she would invite some others as well. We would meet on Tuesdays. Moya and Phil accepted with no reservations, but said she would like to continue the meditations on Fridays as well. A few days later, Cindy rang me saying that she was dissatisfied with a Tarot reading she had given to a client I had recommended to her. She said she had a dreadful headache on one temple, she thought rooted in the neck, and it was driving her mad. It had been present all the previous day, she had not slept, and she had two more readings to do that evening. I promised to send out healing thoughts, which pleased her. At home at 6.30 pm, I began to meditate to music, and focussed all my thoughts on Cindy. I asked my guides to help, and opened myself up as a channel for them, with a prayer. I felt a deep love, tender caring feelings, placed a circle with pink light around her, and no pain was to be felt. Make her happy and functioning for Spirit please. Before seven, I felt a power, had tingles, and felt very emotional. At 11 pm, I sent out healing thoughts during my meditation to heal Cindy, and to sleep well in peace. Next day, the client told me at work that she was very satisfied with Cindy’s reading, although disappointed that her husband had not come through. I rang Cindy to tell her this, but she shocked and pleased me by saying that at 6.50 pm yesterday, her headache disappeared completely, in a flash! She said she knew it was due to my healing thoughts. The relief persisted, she did good readings, it flowed and she was happy. She then felt warm and good, and slept very well. Cindy was full of praise for

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me, but I felt humble about it, it couldn’t have been me, there wasn’t a mechanism for it. Apart from Spiritualist theory, that it was from Spirit, through Spirit (mine) to Spirit, other possibilities included coincidence, healing by faith as she knew I was sending thoughts, or direct healing from the Spirit World encouraged by my thoughts. I had no way of knowing the answer, but the result was good. On 1st December 1994, we had the first circle in Cindy’s house. She said there would be no leader, we should enjoy it, see what happened, by inspiration only. The other sitters, including Moya, were thought of as psychics. There were some messages given, a “trance” by one of us, and some healing was carried out, which I enjoyed. Cindy thought that the thought was the deed in healing, so she did not take part. Although I had helped to bring us all together, I did not feel that I had much to offer, I was like an observer really. I had a similar feeling later when we all went to a cottage, Oak House, in Aldbourne, to do “ghost- busting”. A ghostly monk was reputed to live in a particular room, but when I entered it with the others I did not feel right about it, as they claimed to sense his presence, heard his name Roderick or Broderick, and heard him “hissing “ in a cubby-hole. I felt and heard nothing at all. One of us said he did not like women, but was alright with men. They sat on a leather chair, and said they felt it moving about. Not for me it didn’t. They all held hands and insisted I joined them, then one of us told the monk that he could go,he was released, and no longer had to guard the key. I sensed nothing, and felt like giving up the circle and trying something else. This was psychic stuff I could not relate to. I said I did not expect to get anything, it was not my thing, but I was criticised for being negative. I confided in Phil that I was leaving the Tuesday circle, as they were all psychics, and I did not fit any more, my job was done. Phil must have gone straight to Moya, for she came storming up to me and said don’t you dare leave, we wouldn’t be here without you, you started it off. As I explained how I felt, Cindy came storming in as well, and there was a dramatic confrontation with the others watching. “ What’s all this? If you leave, I’m going to pack it in as well. You do a lot, the times you’ve picked me up when I’ve been low, you give love to the circle, you’re the hub on which all depend. You won’t accept this because you were not loved when you were young, you do not recognise your true worth, you have low self-esteem.” I listened in stunned silence, but not strangely not offended by this rather public character reading. Another lady said that I give a lot of love to the circle, she feels it strongly, I must not leave, you can’t have everyone going off with the fairies! Soon after, Moya invited two new people, Jackie and Barry, to the Friday meditation group, which I was not in favour of. It would change the atmosphere, which had been peaceful, in the home where I had started doing some healing, with the personal friendship. However, Moya wanted it, to move on, which was fair enough. The Tuesday circle at Cindy’s was reformed for the 10th January 1995 meeting, and I healed Fred, who had aching shoulder muscles. I prayed to Spirit to use me as a channel for healing, I placed my hands on his shoulders, and concentrated my thoughts. Later, Fred said that he had felt a warmth, and his shoulder was now easier. He said to me, “It looks like you’ve found what you’re good at”. Moya also told me that my healing had made her back feel better.

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This feedback was encouraging. I had received several messages from mediums by now, saying I could do healing, and I was feeling an effect which gave me confidence. I was not convinced, however, that the source of the healing was from Spirit. There was not enough evidence. What if there is a Universal energy which anyone can tap in to if caring/loving/ emotional enough? Another good question.

Chapter7: Face changes My spiritual journey was showing that you don’t have to be a psychic to enjoy contact with the Spirit World. You can observe, bring together, document, support, try it out. Even if you decide there is no Spirit World, then there are still interesting feelings and experiences as you search, which cannot be explained by orthodox science, such as the table tilt, healing sensations, and many others I had read about.

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Later in January 1995, a colleague came to my office for a chat about my latest psychic investigations, which interested him. As I spoke, he looked at me intently. He said, “ You probably noticed that I was not listening just then, but could I ask you about your aura, do you know it’s main colour”? I said that three mediums have told me that it is green, but I didn’t know. At this, he said “ Oh, it’s amazing, I can’t believe this, your face, head, and chin are green, not your aura outside, but your actual face. It’s still there, the green colour, it’s not the light, I know what I can see.” Graham had no contact with Spiritualism except what I’d talked about sometimes, was down-to-earth, and a non-believer in Spirit. He was rather afraid of what he’d seen, was “gobsmacked”, and was anxious to leave the room. He did ask me what I thought about it. I said, “ Spirit are said to do all sorts of things to show their presence, to people who are interested. It may be their way of giving you a sign, it can happen, you may not be ready yet but you will not forget this”. I thought to myself, is this another door opening for me? Cindy had once seen my face and (clothed) body change in to an Indian brave, and a Chinese-looking man. Were these all signals that face or appearance changes on me, to be seen by others, would be another stage in my learning process? I remembered that Shirley Townsend had seen my face change to that of my father as well, at the end of her reading of me. I felt that I had had enough messages by now, there was nothing further to convince me one way or the other. At a later Tuesday circle, Cindy came to me, and told me that she saw me as an old man, my ears had changed, I was taller and slimmer. She went on at length to say that this man was troubled, and she saw a noose, and he hung himself. I was asked to send out thoughts to help him. Other evidence was given which I understood . This seemed to be a continuation of the face-changing theme. A hanging suicide fitted my great grandfather, but I knew little about him. The next meditation at Moya’s followed the trend. We meditated in subdued light, with a towel over a single table-lamp. After a while, with my mind almost a blank and relaxed, I opened my eyes and looked continuously at Moya. Her head went out of focus, her face seemed a bit different, then I saw purple colours puff up above her head. When I looked at the others in the same way, I saw nothing unusual. Next, I saw a light “halo” or silhouette around her head, she seemed to stretch then shorten, then her body was a black blob, then she had a head of very black hair. Next her face appeared to be Oriental, perhaps Chinese, sharper, brown. A Red Indian face also might have been seen, not sure. If you looked away, or blinked, the changes disappeared until you looked hard again, which indicated that it was a peculiarity of your eyesight. So then, why did it not happen with the other circle members? Afterwards, Moya was overwhelmed. She had seen a headdress come very close, and he said that he would help her. She had had lovely visions of light, up to the ceiling. She had seen a black man as well, for the first time, and a white horse and blanket, which Jackie claimed to have seen clairvoyantly. Was this a kind of “transfiguration”? On February 8th, the meditation at Moya’s was attended by Moya, Phil, Jackie, and myself. We listened to the taped music as before, and when I opened my eyes Moya looked normal. However, a few minutes later, with wide-open eyes, I saw her face blur, change shape, then a glow of light spread out round her chair. I then saw her face

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change to that of a much older woman, but with similar features. I began to feel facial tingles. Soon after, Moya placed her hands in front of her, palms up, slightly apart. She seemed to be “out of it”. Her face began to change to my perception, longer and thinner, then completely black, then there was a yellowy and maroon background, and other colours. It looked beautiful. It was like a dream. Later, Moya said that in the meditation she had seen her mother , a lot of light, Red Indians, a black lady, and an angel. Also an Indian brave, one feather, proud in to battle to be killed. She then said that she had seen my face change. Was I like my father, his nose wider than mine? I said yes. She then gave me a message, about my mother and father. We met again at Cindy’s circle on 14th February, and I watched Cindy during the meditation. Her face blurred, and moved around. Her face then seemed narrower, but with thicker lips, wider eyes, but smaller. It looked pretty, and “royal” perhaps, imagination? The message giving continued with the others. At the next meeting with Moya, I saw face changes on her again. Her face wobbled about, and the light in the room seemed to change, darker. Suddenly, Moya ‘s face became very animated and expressive, as she told us my face was changing, my ears had disappeared, I was changing shape, and I was growing taller, then smaller. The others also saw changes . Moya then said that my face was exactly like that of her father, a clear likeness, the first time she’d seen anything like it, was it overshadowing? I felt strong tingles all over my head, and emotions, but when I was asked to speak to “her father” I could not. On 22nd February, I sat opposite Moya again in the meditation, and this was what I saw. Face change. Light around chair. An older lady. Black face and black hair. Lady with a very white, pale face. A pinky-red coloured face. Golden orange background, then yellow, then purple. Moya said afterwards that she had seen a beautiful Red Indian lady, and she looked at a beautiful golden coloured rose. Jackie then “tranced”, said a few words, and later her face changed. Phil said it looked like Moya’s mother. Moya’s sisters, Lana and Tishy, were invited to sit either side of Moya at the next meditation. Moya’s face changed as usual. Tishy’s face did not. Lana’s face completely changed, and Moya was a bit worried that she was going in to trance. Phil’s face did not change. Whatever the face changes meant, it could not be seen how to take it further. The other circle members began to dislike my analytical, scientific attitude. Cindy said we will never understand it, it will drive you mad, it goes round and round. Moya said she did not want to analyse, but accept what was given. I was healing Moya and Cindy at times, and we went to a Sheila and Phil Scott Open Circle. We meditated there, and had to share our thoughts after. I had healed Cindy in my thoughts, as she felt unwell, and she said she had felt it strongly, and was feeling better now. We continued healing at the next circle, and Cindy said she felt lots of heat and power from me. The face changes continued in the meditations.

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I then applied to train as a healer in another Swindon Church. I had recently joined, and a position as trainee became available. I had tried it out with some effect in the circles and in distant healing for Cindy, after receiving messages I could do it. Presumably there were guides ready and waiting, I thought. My healing training at Somerset Road began on 14th April 1995. In May , I felt like visiting my sister Sylvia in Wareham, and she and her son Tim asked me to tell them about my spiritual experiences. Sylvia had a swollen leg and a bad shoulder. I said I was a trainee healer, and offered to heal it. I did so, and as it happened she later got very involved in Spiritualism. During this period, I was trying to interest Moya and Phil in physical mediumship. A message a year ago had told me a Canon ( who I might have known) was with me, and he would like to prove life after death from the other side of life. He was saying that I was interested in physical mediumship, but was not quite sure if it was the right thing to do. This was true, and in fact I had that day read a copy of the Noah’s Ark Society magazine, which was devoted to the safe practice of physical mediumship. I had joined the Noah’s Ark Society, but was thinking about taking it further. We looked at a NAS booklet. There were only us three, and we discussed where we were going. What were we sitting for? Mental or physical? Healing, philosophy, clairvoyance, overshadowing? There was no recognised medium available to help us further. Moya, supported by Phil, was all for going within, while I was still interested in scientific explanations and physical phenomena which was objective. Moya had been told in meditation that something not in the books would happen, and she would see her mother and father. I took that to be a materialisation from ectoplasm, and we might see that if we got involved in physical mediumship. We tried sitting in black clothes, and in blue light. Our faces changed as before, but nothing new happened. On 8th June, I saw an ad in the NAS magazine to sit in a physical circle. On impulse, I rang her, and we met. She agreed to join us if we desired it. Moya thought it all out, and decided that she wanted three more sitters we had met to join us, if they agreed to sit for physical, no dogma, 8pm to 9.30. I was sorry that we had broken up our meditation circle, which had been so intimate and close, since last October. It was my own fault, I had instigated it. We started the new circle with a Code of Conduct, the NAS way of doing things. Nothing new happened the first time. We all went to the SAGB to for a seminar on 1st July. A physical medium lectured about physical mediumship. Later, he gestured to Moya to trance, she settled down, and soon gave her name as White Feather. Her arms went up, and she pleaded for love and harmony. It was quite emotional, then the medium said there were connections with the White Brotherhood, Knight’s Templar, Conan Doyle. Later, Moya said that when he had asked her, a great heat came from above, her stomach was pulled about, and her hands tingled like mad. Whoosh, several were there, trying to get in. It was hard sorting them out. Healing continued at the Church and in the circles, and there always seemed to be some effect on the patients. I began the SNU course for healers C17, which I eventually passed. We then left Cindy’s Tuesday circle, because Moya and the others

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did not want to sit in two different circles every week. I was sorry to leave Cindy and Fred, but I hoped we would still be friends. Trance was attempted in the first physical circle, but came to nothing. At the next circle, Moya seemed on the edge of trancing and speaking, and I encouraged and welcomed the communicator, but Moya resisted it and came back to us. Lynne then became “trancey”, and Moya encouraged her to speak. Lynne talked in a rather serous clipped voice. “ The circle guide is very pleased with your progress, there are some bright souls among you. I died in a storm. There will be many storms and catastrophies. They are still making the same mistakes.” Carol then became “trancey”, her arms began to twitch, but she was not ready yet. Some healing followed before the circle ended. After we did healing in the Church one evening, Sylvia told me that she was sure a Japanese guide was with me, he lived a long time ago, small, nice brown eyes, not a doctor but in to herbs and natural remedies. I had no idea myself. On the 25th July, Peter Morgan from the Melksham Church came to the discussion group to demonstrate trance. An Irish scientist spoke through him, and asked for questions. I asked, “ Is the spiritual vibration electromagnetic in nature, and where is it in relation to X-rays, the shortest wavelengths we know?” “ Shorter than X-rays, very small, and high in vibration”. I wondered if this was a scientific possibility, and thought I’d look it up. Face changes on Moya continued to be seen by me in the meditations, then there were attempts at trance, and healing. Nothing new was happening, and Lynne began to fidget and feel out of place during the circles, she could not relax. On 7th August, I travelled to Leuven in Belgium for my Company, and there in my hotel bedroom I had a very strange new experience. I meditated late evening, fell asleep, but woke at about 1.30 a.m. There were lights in the room. I felt wide awake, and got up to make sure I was conscious. I looked out and saw a restaurant light on, I closed the curtains to block out light, and returned to bed. The light built up again. I tried to sleep by turning away from the window, but while still awake I “felt” someone was in bed with me. I turned round, “saw” a body with the back to me, and I put my hand out to touch the entities arm. I felt solid flesh! The entity spoke, but not physically, something like “it’s not the right time yet”. At the time I knew I was wide awake, it was not a dream. It was something else. Later I learned it might have been a lucid dream, as they call it. On 11th August, I had a frank talk with Moya about the circle. I was feeling wrong about it, and about being leader, for various reasons. I mistrusted trance, and would like to run a circle the NAS way for physical. Moya then said that she would take over being leader, and do things her way. A Church member was running a physical circle, had heard about us, and he asked me to suggest to Moya that we merge his circle and ours, for physical phenomena. Moya wanted to stay as we were, so we did.

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A physical medium then led a weekend Workshop, and he was entertaining, informative, and amusing, but it was noticeable that he did not do anything to show his powers or contact with Spirit. For example, he asked for a trumpet to be provided, and said he would use it to show ectoplasm coming through it. I asked a friend to supply one, but he did not use it. He said we would all hear buzzing in our ears by the end of the day, but it was not mentioned again. He did not trance or prophecy himself, but relied on others to do it. He was late back from lunch on Sunday, and seemed to let it run itself. We had to find our own methods in circles, there was no guidance. On the Saturday, two mediums tranced, and delivered prophecies. On the Sunday, our circle was Moya, Phil, Susan, Rosemary, Fran, Paul, and myself. In meditation, I had felt strong tingles on my face, and cold breezes. Rosemary tranced, and her arms waved around rather gracefully, as she spoke in what appeared to be like an Eastern foreign language. Moya and Fran sensed Red Indians, but then my heart started pounding, and I felt a different state of awareness. Fran started to speak to me, and seemed very far away. Although I was fully aware, I started to speak, something like, “ Remember that with love, the more you give out, the more it comes back to you”. It was not really me talking, I thought. I stopped and came back to normal awareness. Carol asked if I would get Peter Morgan to carry out trance healing on her husband Pete, as I knew him slightly. Peter’s Spirit doctor manipulated the bad shoulder through him as medium, it was said, after which Pete was able to lift his arm much easier. On the 26th August, Carol and Pete held their own meditation and clairvoyant circle for the first time. They invited to their home seven people they knew, and Carol led it. Some messages were given, and I did four healings, with helpers. I felt heat and energy, and so did the patients from what they said after. With regard to circle work, none of my circle friends were interested in joining the NAS, or operating a physical circle using their guidelines. I knew that I had to branch out somehow on my own to learn about physical mediumship, for several reasons. They did not like my scientific approach. It did not seem likely to me that anything new or valuable to me was likely to come from trance, message-giving, or meditation from us. The healing did have an effect, and this was ongoing. Even with this, I was doubtful whether it was really from the Spirit World through the healer to the patient. It was more likely, I thought, to be the healer tapping in to some energy source in the Universe and transferring it to the patient himself. I decided to attend my first Noah’s Ark Society seminar on 1st September 1995, at Westone Hotel, Northampton. I had to go it alone to progress the search. Chapter 8: The Noah’s Ark Society At the Westone hotel in Northampton, attendees were very friendly. As I registered, someone introduced himself, and described how he had sat in a circle at Scole, and seen light energies and movement of objects, in a dark séance, ie in complete, blacked -out darkness. I then met three ladies who joined us, and I sat by them at

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dinner. They told me about some of the events in their physical circle. One of them was a developing physical medium, and the other two were helping her to develop. Later, one of the ladies I’d met unexpectedly invited me to a séance in one of the bedrooms. It was pitch black in there, the first time I had experienced this. Some people find this scary and claustrophobic, but I felt all right about it, it was quite natural to me. The circle numbered nine, including me and my new friends, and a Society Committee member. One of new my friends went in to trance, and a guide named Red Arrow spoke through her, in a male type of voice, then a lady named Flora, well-spoken but sounding a bit old-fashioned, who spoke to another of our group. A man with a Cockney voice, giving the name of Norman, asked for help, through one of us. Some of the sitters advised him to look to the light, then he apparently saw relatives who led him away. I had heard similar things before in other mental circles, spirit rescue. Next day, there were excellent lectures. Wilfred Watts, an experienced medium, who supported physical mediumship, said he would like more science involved, and said it could eliminate the thoughts of the medium interfering with accuracy of communications. Don Mercer, a chemist, described some physical phenomena he’d known, and emphasised the enormous potential and capabilities of the brain, so we have to ask questions! These talks made me think that perhaps I was in the right place at last. Then Stephen Turoff talked about his history, and emphasised that we must have real evidence and progress with Spirit. He was a healer who performed psychic operations. We were told next day by an attendee named Chris that they had also had a room séance, he and others had tranced, their fingers were placed on the table, it vibrated, then rose up, ended up at arm’s length, and gently came back down again. This was called levitation. A Margaret and Jack then told us that they had attended Stewart Alexander’s public demonstration séance the previous evening. Two “trumpets” had a voice coming through them with a message, trumpets had whizzed around, revolving, and a trumpet had rolled down Margaret’s body and through the chair legs. Trumpets were aluminium cones, often used in physical circles, with fluourescent tabs on them, or paint, to show up in the dark when phenomena took place. It was now time for my first séance with a developed physical medium, named “Lincoln” at the time. His real name was Colin Fry, and he later gained fame as a mental medium as well. As is usual at the NAS, sitters were searched as they entered the hotel room, and various personal items had to be left outside. Instructions as to behaviour had been given, anyone not attending this were not allowed to sit in the séance. Lincoln was tied up with cable ties in a chair, these were checked by a volunteer for security, and he on the chair was placed sideways in to the cabinet by two helpers. . The only door was locked, and when the lights were turned off, it was pitch black. About forty of us were sitting close together in rows round the cabinet, and we were asked to sing. Soon we heard a gurgling noise, then a fine female voice joined in, said to be Frances, ie Judy Garland. It was very loud, with vibrato, and did resemble Judy’s voice. We all sang for some time, and as we changed songs she joined in again. The voice drowned us out, however it was projected and amplified in to the room.

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Next a man’s voice was heard, a guide or helper said to be Felix, and he answered questions and spoke some philosophy. Then, a trumpet whirled around the room above our heads seeming to go close to the ceiling. We saw this because fluorescent tabs were stuck on it. I was amazed, having not seen this before. I could not think of a way in which this could have been done fraudulently. After a few minutes, it fell to the floor with a thud. Next, a man’s voice sounding like Liberace talked and joked with us as Liberace used to do when on Earth, and he gave a message to someone whose child was learning to play the piano. Daphne was the last to come through, with a distinctive female voice. There was some repartee and banter, and a message was given and accepted.. A big bump was heard, and when the lights came on Lincoln was seen outside the cabinet, still firmly tied up. The séance had been exciting and quite humorous. It was mysterious how all the different voices had been produced through the male medium, and how the trumpet was propelled around the room. However, the messages from communicators were no better than from mental mediums, probably less evidential. They had not proved their identity very well. A critic can always say that the darkness can hide deception. Faith and trust in the medium and the back-up team was needed, to eliminate the possibility of fraud and collusion. While there was no reason to suspect fraud during my time in the NAS, there were sometimes calls from members, and others, to allow infra-red filming of the séances. This was always refused, allegedly by the Spirit communicators, for a number of reasons. Before we left for home, my three new friends said that a medium had given them a message, to use a Tesla soil to amplify the sounds which they heard in their circle. Had I heard of it? I said yes, and might be able to get one made at work. The physical medium rang me a few days later, and asked if I could get a Tesla coil made, and invited me to one of their séances soon. She hinted it might be more permanent, but did I live too far away, 60 miles? We all met in Poole, and the medium gave us guidance from a trance-like state, that my friend at work would be inspired what to do. I agreed to join their circle, which was established within the NAS, and sit for the development of the medium. I understood that my role would be to supply energy to the circle for the medium , I would be a bit more technically minded than them, and to be a witness and scribe of the activities.. It had been an unusual kind of electrical circle, I was told. I had told a friend at work about the Tesla coil concept, and he had some ideas for it. There would be two wound coils, linked together, inside a cardboard box. The principle was, that Spirit would introduce energy between the coils, and this energy would be circuited to the amplifier and speaker so that it could be heard. It is wellknown that either an electrical or a magnetic field introduced between two coils will cause a signal to be induced, which can be seen on an oscilloscope, and can be amplified so as to be audible. Bob was an electrician and radio ham, and we relied on him to give us advice, as my electrical knowledge was limited. He felt that using the principle of two resonant coupled coils would be safe to start with, with no high voltage input, which is normally present in Tesla coil systems.

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The first séance was without our coil system, to get me introduced to the sitters and how they operated. The medium sat on my left in the cabinet. Another sitter, a lady who did healing, faced me with her back to the door, and the leader of the circle was on my right, operating two cassette recorders. One played taped music to raise the vibrations and get us singing, the other was to record the sounds of the circle, and was connected to a microphone on a table in the centre. A trumpet was on the table also.A little keyboard was placed out of reach of us all in the centre. A dish of chemicals, which Spirit had asked for, were on my right. I was told that the leader opened in prayer, the cassette recorders were turned on, and the lights switched off, causing total darkness. The sitters had a routine of playing and singing a few songs, pausing the tape, and then chatting about what was felt to be happening.. I was told to expect various unusual sounds through the speakers, and the keyboard might be played. This was said to be caused by Spirit working with us, and I thought I would always sit in this circle using the thought of Spirit as a working hypothesis. It was no use being sceptical or negative, this was said to inhibit any phenomena. Various Spirit guides or helpers, male and female, had spoken through the medium’s vocal chords, after she became entranced. They were sitting for direct voice mediumship, whereby Spirit would construct a “ voicebox” with ectoplasm, through which spirits would speak to us directly, without the medium’s body being involved. I had read about this before. Leslie Flint was a famous direct voice medium who had been tested by scientists and investigators. The lights were turned off, and the séance began. After the prayers, we sang a few hymns and quiet songs, then Queen songs, a particular favourite of the medium. It was pitch black, only some fluorescent tabs to mark the objects could be seen. I could see colours, blue and mauve and purple, around the trumpet. My body became very warm, and there were intense itchings on my face. Later, cold breezes played around my head, legs, and neck. The itches spread around my face, head, jaw, and in my nose. There was pressure on my head, like a headache. Even my arms began to itch. The guide and protector, Red Arrow, then spoke through the entranced medium, welcomed me, and said how much they appreciated me travelling a long way to get here. He said that Spirit operators planned to use energies through the coil, and my suggestion to use an oscilloscope to detect anything happening was a good idea. It felt weird to be talking to a guide from the other side of life, but I said that the coil might pick up all sorts of signals, like an antenna, it may be a problem to filter these out and only select Spirit energies. Red Arrow said “your friend will be inspired to work out a solution. Tesla was helping Michael (Faraday) with the communication. They are not using ectoplasm in the same way now, to safeguard the mediums, but energies and chemicals from the circle, and electricity. It will be fantastic!” After he blessed us all with his dignified male voice and left, one of the regular communicators known as “Sweetheart” broke in with a high pitched girly voice, and welcomed “an old man” to the circle. She requested two songs, and soon after the medium came out of trance, coughing quite violently. My reaction to the circle was that this was an excellent opportunity to use the scientific method to record and analyse events in the circle. I was now an insider, so a lot of doubts could be ruled out now. Phenomena could be objective if experienced by more than one of us. If not explainable in normal terms, then unknown energy or power could be considered as a cause. I was involved in setting up the conditions as

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well, could experience everything going on, and ask any questions. Fraud would seem difficult in that environment, and what motive would they have anyway? No money was involved, and in fact it was costing us all to sit in the circle in time and expenses. This “power” could come from us, we do not know the limit of human powers yet. As well as the Spirit World, anything else would have to be considered. I drove the sixty miles home tired, but pleased. It looked promising. Although the others seemed to be the psychic ones, I had a job to do which they recognised as important.

"Before we left for home, my three new friends said that a medium had given them a message, to use a Tesla soil to amplify the sounds which they heard in their circle. Had I heard of it? I said yes, and might be able to get one made at work. I agreed to join their circle, which was established within the NAS, and sit for the development of the medium. I understood that my role would be to supply energy to the circle for the medium , I would be a bit more technically minded than them, and to be a witness and scribe of the activities.. It had been an unusual kind of electrical circle, I was told.

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I had told a friend at work about the Tesla coil concept, and he had some ideas for it. There would be two wound coils, linked together, inside a cardboard box. The principle was, that Spirit would introduce energy between the coils, and this energy would be circuited to the amplifier and speaker so that it could be heard. It is wellknown that either an electrical or a magnetic field introduced between two coils will cause a signal to be induced, which can be seen on an oscilloscope, and can be amplified so as to be audible. Bob was an electrician and radio ham, and we relied on him to give us advice, as my electrical knowledge was limited. He felt that using the principle of two resonant coupled coils would be safe to start with, with no high voltage input, which is normally present in Tesla coil systems. I was told that the leader opened in prayer, the cassette recorders were turned on, and the lights switched off, causing total darkness. The sitters had a routine of playing and singing a few songs, pausing the tape, and then chatting about what was felt to be happening.. I was told to expect various unusual sounds through the speakers, and the keyboard might be played. This was said to be caused by Spirit working with us, and I thought I would always sit in this circle using the thought of Spirit as a working hypothesis. The lights were turned off, and the séance began. After the prayers, we sang a few hymns and quiet songs, then Queen songs, a particular favourite of the medium. It was pitch black, only some fluorescent tabs to mark the objects could be seen. I could see colours, blue and mauve and purple, around the trumpet. My body became very warm, and there were intense itchings on my face. Later, cold breezes played around my head, legs, and neck. The itches spread around my face, head, jaw, and in my nose. There was pressure on my head, like a headache. Even my arms began to itch. The guide and protector, Red Arrow, then spoke through the entranced medium, welcomed me, and said how much they appreciated me travelling a long way to get here. He said that Spirit operators planned to use energies through the coil, and my suggestion to use an oscilloscope to detect anything happening was a good idea. It felt weird to be talking to a guide from the other side of life, but I said that the coil might pick up all sorts of signals, like an antenna, it may be a problem to filter these out and only select Spirit energies. Red Arrow said “your friend will be inspired to work out a solution. Tesla was helping Michael (Faraday) with the communication. They are not using ectoplasm in the same way now, to safeguard the mediums, but energies and chemicals from the circle, and electricity. It will be fantastic!” After he blessed us all with his dignified male voice and left, one of the regular communicators known as “Sweetheart” brok

Before the first circle with the coil, I took all the borrowed equipment away, and set it up as Bob had told me at home, and also in my own laboratory. There was lots of electrical equipment around , but the oscilloscope always displayed only a straight line, showing that the coil box was not sensitive to atmospheric “noise”. The medium’s house was in quite a rural area, and we did not expect any local “noise” to

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interfere with our experiments in circle, although this was not proved or disproved, it was beyond my capabilities to find out. Anything “abnormal” picked up by the coil would have to be judged on it’s merits. The first Tesla coil circle took place on November 6th, 1995. I set up the oscilloscope on a table on my right, so that we could all see it, and it was connected to the Tesla coil box within our circle. The room was set up as described for my first circle with this group. This remained much the same until I left the circle, but any variations in the conditions are described. The circle started with an excited atmosphere in the room. As the music played, we heard an “echo”, like feedback in a way, but it seemed to resonate and vibrate. This was outside of my knowledge, as the flat microphone was fixed high on the wall, some distance from the recorder. At the same time, we all saw the oscilloscope display change from flat, to jagged peaks, and pulsations as the display rippled from right to left, and left to right. Some kind of energy had to be being picked up by the coil. The medium was then inspired to ask for the music to be turned up slightly, this was done, and a loud click was heard over the amplifier. She said, “That’s it!”, and the echo vibration increased. Gradually, a piercing note built up from the “echo”, which ebbed and flowed in volume. It filled the room, and during the Lord’s Prayer music it increased so much that it drowned our speech and the music. We called this sound “the zing”. It can be likened to a very loud tuning fork, vibrating and resonating, at a constant pitch. The “zing” stopped very quickly to nothing each time, corresponding with activity on the oscilloscope screen. The music was paused, Viv said hello to Red Arrow, and then followed a very loud “zing”. The leader turned down the recording machine volume a little, in case this was causing the noise, but it continued several times. The music continued, and the screen showed activity. Several clicks were heard. The music was paused again, and the medium said there was an awful stink. I could smell a kind of musty, acrid odour. The other sitter then suggested that we might ask questions, and hope for a reply, yes or no, on the screen. We agreed, and the leader asked me to speak to “them”, said to be Tesla and Faraday. I was rather overawed at speaking to the spirits of such famous scientists, and did not really believe this was the case, but we had just proved that unexpected, not understood, electromagnetic energy had been received by the coil box because we had seen it’s effects on the oscilloscope. I regretted the fact that I was not qualified to understand electronics enough to check for other causes or reasons, but had to rely on asking Bob at work later. I began. “ Would you give us a yes on the screen please.” The display was a rippling bank on the right of the screen, moving left to right. “ Would you give us a yes again?” A similar rolling bank appeared again. “ Would you give us a no please?” The rolling bank, to my surprise, moved to the left of the screen, from right to left, which we all clearly saw. Fred then said, “ Has the equipment been of any use to you tonight, Michael?” The rolling bank was now in the middle of the screen, did this mean maybe perhaps? Viv then said, “ Have you been singing along with us, Freddy?”

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We heard a click, and Di saw a pulse in the middle of the screen. Viv asked , “ Has Flora and Sweetheart (two regular communicators) been singing with us?” The rolling bank gave a no, showing on the left of the screen. “Shall we go on longer?” A no to this. “ Have we finished circle?” A yes, as the rolling bank moved to the right of screen. This phenomena had astonished me, because while random atmospheric energies could have caused the moving pulsing movements, they had actually occurred in response to my requests straight away, and this seemed far too coincidental. We had all seen it, and agreed on what we had seen. This could be called magic, in the same way as the table tilt could be, there was no rational explanation. Next day, I explained to Bob as best I could, what had happened, and he, despite his electronics knowledge and being a radio ham, could not explain the events in normal terms. The patterns on the screen I had described reminded him of microphone waves, and he suggested connecting the coil up to an amplifier and speaker instead of the oscilloscope. Perhaps “they” wanted to amplify and convert to audio the energies which we had seen displayed. Bob put together an old amplifier and small speaker, and a T-piece connection, so that we could plug in either or both of the oscilloscope or amplifier. It was connected to the coil, tested with a signal generator, and it produced sound through a range of frequencies. My own range of hearing was up to 12500 Hz, the highest note I could hear. Bob said that the “resonance” for this coil was 2500 Hz, when the sound became louder and stronger. We now knew that if Spirit, or another agency, introduced a signal to the coil between 50 and 12500 Hz, I would hear a continuous note during the circle. I continued healing training at the Church, and after healing that week, the lead healer told me that she had “seen” a tall Chinese man with me during the healing, with a black drooping moustache. He had been an apothecary while on Earth, and was skilled in herbal remedies and acupuncture. She had said something similar before, but I had no way of knowing if it was true. Before the next Monday circle, I felt headachey and a bit sick all day, and had to drive the 60 miles to the circle in fog. I tried to heal myself, and did feel better when I got there. Another sitter had a bad cold. On arrival, I set up the new equipment. The amplifier and speaker was on the table in front of me, and the coil was on my left. Di had some sensations after we began the circle which she described. Quite a loud click was heard from my new setup as we were singing, then a sound like someone drumming their fingers, then a louder click. Later, there was a very long crackling noise. Flora then spoke through the medium, and gave various pieces of advice and instructions. She then said to me, “Who used to call you Normy?” I understood, an old mate called me this. “Love from whoever used to call you Normy”. Chat and banter followed. Flora confirmed that the “voicebox” was finished, except for a few things, and another click was heard.

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On Sunday 13th November, I attended a NAS séance at the Baker residence in Bath, with Lincoln ( Colin Fry) as the medium. There I met a Danish man named Carl, who lived in Germany. He was well-educated, and knew a lot about EVP ( electronic voice phenomena). I told him that our circle was also very interested in EVP. He asked me, when he knew I worked in science, if I knew what kind of energy was involved with this. I said that I did not know, but if they want us to know we will find out. We were all searched before entry as always. As it happened, Carl was asked to sit next to me in the front row. Carl and I volunteered to check that the cable ties on Lincoln were secure. I pulled the ties to check tightness, noted their position, and how he was sat in the chair. I could see nothing inside the empty cabinet. Lincoln, trussed up in the chair, was placed well inside the cabinet. The curtains were drawn, the door locked, and lights turned off. The room was completely dark. We all began to sing, and the first voice through the medium was said to be Frances, aka Judy Garland. Over the rainbow, and the One that got away, were sung very loudly, and sounded similar to Judy’s voice with emotion, and just like I heard before in the Westone Hotel séance. Felix then answered some questions, and I asked him, on behalf of me and Carl, “Could you tell us anything about the nature of the energy which the Spirit World uses to communicate with us by means of EVP, tape recordings etc? Are we meant to find out eventually to help the bridge between the two worlds?” The communicator replied. The physical machines are only part of the natural energy, life itself is the energy, if you want something it comes to you by way of inspiration. What matters is going within to find your Higher Self, that you might develop and carry out service to others in your life. Science is not necessary to do this, it draws you away from going within. “ But there is a science your side, surely, the natural laws under which you live?” Felix continued, If you like to call it a science that is so, but it is not like Earthly science. After a gurgling sound, a new voice called out, “Steiner, Steiner”. Carl asked something in German, “…. Rudolph?” I think. A reply came apparently in German, which I did not understand. A trumpet came towards us, shown by it’s luminous tabs, and there was the sound of padding footsteps with it. I would have dearly loved illumination at his point. Carl was now asked, in English, to take hold of the trumpet, but it was out of his reach, while within mine. It was about two feet in front of my chair, suspended horizontally about three feet from the floor. I felt like grabbing it in my curiosity, but it was not meant for me, and we have to go by the rules. It dropped to the floor with a bang. A conversation followed between Carl, and Steiner through the medium. Carl : EVP is at a dead end. Steiner: You should start again at home, you gave up too easily. Carl: I have tried everything. Steiner: Yes, physical phenomena will be produced. Carl: How? There is no medium, have you any clues? Steiner: There is a man, young, wild, and uncontrolled. You will tame him. His mother is Austrian. Carl: Is it one of my students?

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Steiner: There is one like that, but he is staunch Catholic. Start again, at home. Carl: In Munich? Steiner: No, at home. Carl: Ah, in ( a name given, sounded like Weisenbaum). Two communicators then came through and were recognised by sitters. A bell was rung. Two lady guides then spoke. We sang while Lincoln came round, there was a loud bang, and when the lights went on Lincoln was seated outside the cabinet still tied up. Carl and I inspected the ties, and they were still tight, and in the same place as far as I could tell. The next Tesla circle was on the Wednesday, because the others sat twice a week, but it was too far for me to travel. It was my job to transcribe the tapes for all the circles. They had used my coil/amp/ speakersetup ,as we did last time. They heard a double click and a loud click, then there was a loud crackle over the speaker, and the little keyboard “switched itself on” to play a recorded tune. The button was out of reach of everyone. Di remarked that, just before, she had asked in her mind to be given a sign “to show they were there”. There were many more clicks, long crackles of sound, and a double “raspberry” noise. This was for me the third definitely paranormal event in my search so far, and I hoped I would be with them if and when it happened again. Chapter 10: Physical versus mental? That Saturday, 18th November, the fortnightly “mental” circle was held at Pete and Carol’s house. We meditated, my right cheek itched, my right ear became numb, and tingles moved all round my head. When I opened my eyes, I saw changes on the faces of Moya and Sue, in the candlelight. Moya’s arms went straight up in the air, she had felt compelled to do it, it was not her, she said later. Pete was emotional, as he had seen a being of Light with piercing blue eyes. Someone suggested an “aura feeling experiment”. This involved two people placing their hands close to a third volunteer, one round the head, the other lower down. Nothing special happened with the first two pairs, then some went off for a smoke. Anne suggested that she and I should try with Pete. He laughingly agreed, and stood up. I stood on a chair, and placed my hands several inches from his head, at the back and the front. Anne placed her hands on front of his chest, some way off. Pete started to sway around, and I felt heat between us. Moya and Phil, watching, saw face changes on him. I felt I should move my hand on top of Pete’s head, and it became warm. I felt dreamy as I concentrated. Suddenly, Pete began to speak, and one of his hands began to shake strongly. A gruff, strong voice said “ I am pleased with our progress, and will return again”. Pete then came back to us, saying he had no idea what had happened. It was quite emotional, and tearful. This was not supposed to happen. We had smelled a perfume before this. I did not sleep well that night. I wondered if we were capable of handling the “power” at the “mental” circle, if that’s what it was, and whether it was connected with events in the Tesla circle, which I felt had strong leadership. Tesla circles followed, with nothing extra going on of note, until at the circle just before our trip to Scarborough Red Arrow gave a message through the medium.

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“Would (the leader) mind if she did not present the circle work at “ Around the circles? Work that has been done is a first, and your circle is not meant for the chosen few, but others should learn about it. Can Norman present it, because he has a scientific mind, and will put it over in such a way that the authenticity will not be doubted.” Soon after, the circle members travelled to Scarborough and stopped overnight nearby. We had a cup of tea in my bedroom, then I suggested a group meditation, as we had not tried this before and I was curious as to what might happen. Lights were turned off as we listened to an Eagle Spirit tape. The music got slower and slower, and slurred, and it jerked me back out of my relaxed frame of mind. When I opened my eyes, I saw the medium drinking tea. The others were still “away”. When the tape stopped, the medium laughed her head off. She thought that “they” (Spirit) had messed it up, because she had started to give out ectoplasm, and “they” did not want that. Later, I found that there was nothing wrong with the player or the tape, and it played normally. ( As it happened). At the Cober Hill Hotel in Scarborough, we booked in, I met Carl again, and introduced him to the others. We met Mike Rogers, the NAS electronics man, at dinner, and he had the idea of using a “crystal set” with a germanium diode, attached to the coil and amplified, to modulate the input. There were several interesting lectures, including one by Carl Steenstrup on EVP, which he called “the poor man’s direct voice”. He also ran an EVP Workshop, and some claimed to hear voices from tapes, but I only heard one short phrase in a whispered voice, with the word “medium” in it. He was very dedicated to the subject. Mary Armour talked about Helen Duncan’s life, Stewart Alexander talked about his life as a channel, Alf Winchester lectured about trance states, and Tom Harrison talked very movingly about full materialisations in his circle, beginning in 1946. The main event followed, a séance with Stewart Alexander. A guide, White Feather, spoke through Stewart,and a boy Christopher with his humour. Two trumpets, with tabs on, flew around the room several times quickly and gracefully at different heights, up to the ceiling at times. There were understood messages through the trumpets. I was sat by a very attractive girl, Jennifer. I joked with her that I had heard that a frequent communicator, Walter Stinson, always selected an attractive young lady from among us to use in a demonstration. You’re in with a good chance! And so it happened. Walter called out her name, she was escorted by one of Stewart’s circle with a dim red torch through the dark towards the medium, and he talked to her and materialised his hands, which he used to pat her with, to show his presence to a witness. She was asked to confirm that Stewart’s own arms were still tied up, and she felt the patting and saw hands by the glow of a luminous plaque. I almost felt psychic (ha!) as she returned to her seat by me in quivering excitement! I was unable to explain all this rationally, unless it was a fraud from start to finish. I could not see how that would work, either. At the “Around the circles” session, a few circle spokesmen told of their circle developments, and the medium and myself explained about the use of the coil in the circle.

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Before we returned home, we saw Carl again to listen to the EVP taped voices again from the Workshop. When we were alone, he asked me if I was going to publish anything about our communications with the Tesla coil. I said no, I wanted to help and share, love and friends were the most important, and to develop through service to others. Carl said, “You’re a saint! I would love to be famous, especially in something which has never been done before.” The Tesla circles for the next few weeks produced some interesting sounds, and interactions and conversations with communicators, but there was nothing really new to move the circle development forward. During this period, I continued to sit in circle in Swindon. The fortnightly circle was again held at Carol and Pete’s house. I felt uncomfortable about it. Complete harmony is essential for success, and it seemed that there was no consensus among the sitters as to the aims and objects of the circle. However, if I wanted to stay with Moya and Phil, and help and support Pete and Carol, then I thought I would have to stay with it and try to be positive. Nothing of note happened, except when I healed Pete later he almost “tranced” again, but fought against it. People had wandered in and out while the healing was going on, and I felt that perhaps a greater respect for Spirit was needed. Pete had told Carol that he had complete trust in Norman to look after him if he tranced. I said we must not push him, it takes a long time to develop. Carol later asked us all if we would sit for Pete for trance, and all agreed. I tried to persuade us all to join the NAS, for safety and to benefit from their experience, but they were not prepared to do this. If it developed in to physical phenomena, then we would have been helped and protected by experienced mediums in the Society. However, I thought it better if I stayed with the group to help, although they were determined to do it their way. It was a very busy time for me, spiritually. Monday was the Tesla circle, we’d just had the fortnightly circle, and I was still sitting with at Moya’s on Wednesdays. In the next Wednesday meditation, in a subdued white light, Carol’s face changed a lot to my eyes, and I saw coloured backgrounds behind her as I used to see with Moya. Her face turned black, then like a man, and with shorter hair. My gaze on her seemed to click from one scene to another. Later, Carol said that she had seen a black man, her head felt tight, and her lips had felt puffy, during the meditation. The next Saturday circle at Pete and Carol’s was supposed to be a physical circle, but they had candles burning. I felt intense tingles on my face, but the sitters were very half-hearted about singing, and did not know the words. Suddenly, Pete began to speak, in a kind of Welsh accent, unlike his normal Geordie speech. He said that he loved the Welsh music we had been playing, he had worked in a coalmine, and came from Merthyr. He told us we were on the right path. Moya encouraged him to talk. He said his name was Ted Evans, he died in the battle if the Somme on July 1st, 1916, serving with the Royal Welsh Fusiliers. He described the scene, his mates mowed down, and being caught on barbed wire. I was intrigued, so soon after, I checked out “Ted Evans”, in the Reference Library. I found the official book of casualties from the First World War, and found there was a

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23rd Regiment of the Welsh Fusiliers, they did fight in the 1916 Battle of the Somme, and it did begin on 1st July. There had been heavy casualties, and many had got caught on barbed wire which had not been broken by the shelling. Ted Evans had described all this through Pete, and here I was reading eye-witness reports in the book. The only problem was, the communicator’s name was not confirmed. No Ted or Edward Evans or with E as a second Christian name. Other Edward Evans had died in the War, but elsewhere at different times. We were disappointed of course, and doubts were planted. Again the ambiguity. Just when it seems you are getting somewhere, it falls apart. What was the source of this correct information, and why had “Ted” spoken ? Perhaps I was being over-critical, but proof of identity is needed before getting carried away with enthusiasm. Later, I was told that the communicator Ted Evans gave an excuse about giving the wrong name, but I did not know any details, they kept no records of later circles. In the Wednesday meditation circle next time, Moya asked us all to “look for the child within”, and I “imagined” a kind of fairy story. Strangely, when I later told the Tesla circle medium about this, she said that she had had a “message” for me two days before, but felt silly and did not give it. It was, to tell me to look for the child within. On the Saturday after Christmas, we all turned up for Carol’s fortnightly circle, and she played my Welsh music tape. After three songs, Pete tranced, and “Ted Evans” gave us all our guides and advice. To me, he said, “ You are the most scientific I have seen, dotting i’s and crossing t’s all the time, but this is necessary and should be encouraged. You have the gift of healing and does Nostradamus mean anything to you?” The group dynamics were feeling rather awkward for me by now. The others would not take my advice to join the NAS, and my scientific outlook was generally disliked. This would have been the perfect time to gracefully withdraw from the circle, looking back, but I still felt drawn to Moya and some others, and I did not want to miss any future experiences. The Wednesday meditation would also have been at risk. However, I was feeling very negative and down, unlike my usual self, and it was possible that an entity might have been influencing me without me being aware of it. Saturday 14th January was the day when Carol said the last circle would be held in her house. I went along, thinking one last time would do no harm. We meditated as usual, candles lit, and I felt tingles and cold breezes. When I looked at Pete, he seemed to be going off. Carol stopped the music and did not seem to know whether to encourage the trance, or bring him back. Because he had asked me to look after him, and I was concerned that we were “out of our depth”, I gently talked him back. I sensed that the others had wanted him to continue, and I had stopped the “entertainment”. Perhaps that’s unfair, but my main concern was with Pete’s safety. We ate afterwards, then had a discussion. It got quite heated as they all seemed very much against the scientific approach, and the NAS methods. I felt totally on my own. The others generally had a faith in Spirit approach. I had a more scientific, evidencebased approach. They would continue in the same way. At a following Wednesday circle, I was in a strange, resentful, negative mood. Moya tried to cheer me up and draw me out, but I did not respond. She then gave me a message during the circle.

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“ I have someone with me. I see you on a long, wide road, abroad, there is a high mountain ahead. They are showing me a big reel, with a cable on it. ( I had recently, unknown to Moya, visited Munich on Company business, which involved reels of plastic tubing looking like cable, and I had travelled on an autobahn towards the Austrian mountains.) “ Two things, look like cotton reels”. ( Yes, the Tesla coil wires were wrapped round formers looking like cotton reels.) “ A triangle, like a diagram”. (Yes, Bob had shown me the triangle symbol for a diode which was involved with the Tesla circle in a crystal radio set). “A piece of wood, pins on it or screws”. ( Bob had made me a crystal set from a kit, with a wood base, and pins and screws). “ An old-fashioned wireless”. ( Yes, a crystal set had been incorporated in to the Tesla coil setup). “ I see a light, white and yellow, coming in on the reels, like a cinema projection beam.” ( Yes. Our medium had said in circle that she had seen light on the Tesla coil, and a flash towards her at times). “ Something looks like a vapour trail” ( Maybe ectoplasm?) “ A cone like a rocket, the end screws off”. ( I did not understand this). “ They’re saying module, or something. What’s that?” ( I thought of modulation, which we had discussed with reference to the Tesla coil for speech conversion). “ Something is the wrong way round, or upside down, to do with all this. Now you are being shown to me in an aeroplane, with a parachute on, they are saying jump out, go for it and trust it, don’t hold back. The parachute will bring you back to Earth.” Moya said she did not know most of the information, but saw pictures in her mind’s eye, and had to work hard to get it over for me. She rang me next day, to invite me to join them in a visit to a medium. I said no, rudely, and we discussed what had happened lately. She said I was still looking too much for evidence of survival, and we argued heatedly. I felt frustrated, being pulled two ways. I left Moya’s circle. We now had different pathways, but it hurt, that I no longer belonged in mental circles with my old friends. I could now concentrate on our physical circle, and take it as far as I could. It seemed natural for my outlook and abilities.

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Chapter 11: Only the physical The search was now concentrated within the Tesla physical circle. It was a relief in a sense, to help develop a physical medium, rather than sitting in circles watching members trying to develop their individual abilities. I had left Pete and Carol’s fortnightly circle as well as Moya’s . My healing training in the Church seemed to be going well. Each time I would feel heat and energy, which patients sometimes told me they felt also, and they felt comfort, and relief from pain at times. It was said by some that spiritual healing was physical mediumship, as it had a physical effect as the healing energy passed from Spirit, through Spirit ( the healer), to Spirit ( the patient). When I healed I always thought that it was having an effect, whatever the source of the energy, and this has continued until the present day. In early January, many very loud noises were heard during a circle, and the medium felt temperature changes from very cold, to hot. Before the medium became “entranced”, there was a long power surge through the speaker, and three quick notes were played on the keyboard by an unknown mechanism. The medium whooped with joy and triumph. It was the third time the keyboard had been played after a power surge, a little differently each time. A Queen song “Who wants to live for ever” was playing, and the medium encouraged “Freddy” by saying, “ Come on Freddy, belt it out!” She said she heard whispering, although it was not on the recorded tape, and she felt a cool breeze on her face, when there was a short power surge ( like an explosion) , a longer power surge, and the keyboard switched itself on to play a recorded tune. The medium thought she heard two notes played beforehand. None of us could reach the keyboard, unless we got up and moved towards it in the dark. I was pretty sure that this did not happen, as objects were in the way, and I would have noticed movement. I felt trust in the honesty of all the sitters, and what was there to gain by cheating anyway? This event was added to the list of previous paranormal occurrences. The

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others were quite blasé about it, but it was to me like science fiction, in reality. Who/what played the piano? Later in January, Bob brought me the crystal set he had made up. He explained it’s principles, and how to connect it up. It was made for medium wave. I tried it out before circle. At home, I connected up a 60 foot long aerial wire between the set and the end of my garden. Another wire between the set and a radiator provided an earth. I listened, using the earphone, and it worked, a Spanish radio station was being picked up. When the set was connected to amp and speakers, there was quite loud clear reception. I then disconnected the aerial wire from the set, and the set went dead. I tuned the capacitor for some time, but could hear nothing. This followed the theory, a long distance aerial was needed to obtain the energy from the airwaves. This meant that, in the séance room, we would not expect radio stations to be picked up, unless there was locally very strong signals, perhaps, or if there were other energies, from “Spirit” or other sources. When the crystal set was connected to the coil, and also to the amp and speaker, in the séance room, we heard a crackle and faint speech in Spanish. This was surprising as Bob had said that this was unlikely without a long external aerial wire. We all got prepared to start circle, and we heard the Spanish radio programme increase in volume. Coincidentally, what sounded like a prayer was being spoken in Spanish to a congregation. The medium said we want Heaven, not Spain! She suggested that the “power” building up had caused the increase in volume. Shei thanked “them” for turning down the volume during our opening prayer, showing that they really were in control. After I spoke the words “We thank you for your guidance and inspiration”, there was an extremely loud power surge noise which made us all jump. As we sang some songs, clicks and a loud surge was heard, and taps and thumps. There were bump sounds long and short which reminded me of Morse Code, and I said so. Immediately, we heard a group of very loud clicks or explosive sounds: short, short, long, pause short. More clicks, double clicks, and surges followed. The medium said she thought they were tuning the set, because there was a different language now, and a click followed as if to agree. Three loud thumping clicks followed, and the medium heard a kind of “theme tune” from the radio played over and over, faintly, about ten times. I heard it as well, and we hummed it together. It was repeated, I said we could hear, and there was a click. Fred asked if “they” were making noises over the new equipment, and there was a click, followed by others. Red Arrow, through the medium, then spoke to us, and asked me to change over the crystal set to the short wave band, before we closed the circle. Next day at work, I told Bob how the crystal set had performed in the circle, and he was surprised. It was “against the rules” to get a clearly heard crystal radio signal without an attached long external aerial. When he ordered the set, he did not know that crystal sets were able to pick up shortwave transmissions as well as medium wave. He took the set away to change over the tappings so that we would receive short wave, as requested by the circle guide. This was done, ready for the next circle. During the next circle, the medium began rocking backwards and forwards in her chair, breathing deeply, and a gruff indistinct voice was heard. Our leader tried to talk to the communicator, without much success. Flora then spoke through the medium,

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and explained that he was a new gentleman. Each communicator made himself known to the medium in a different way, so that she would be satisfied with the identity. Flora continued conversing with us, and among the noises I heard a sound like a telephone bell, which I remarked on. Flora said, “ You will hear all sorts of things, I am being told. Perhaps you should answer it, Norman dear. They must practice on the correct wave to come through”. I was hearing a twittering sound, which I thought could have been voices trying to speak, and I suggested this. The leader said, “There is a rabble of voices, isn’t there?” Flora replied, “ You can’t expect perfect, my dear, in one evening.” The energy seemed to be building up in the next few circles. There were different unusual sounds, and the medium had a lot of sensations like cold air and cool energy. We all could smell chemicals and musty odours at times. The medium and the leader saw light flashes between the coilbox and the medium. I did not observe this. The medium said that a “sheet” had been formed next to her cheek , her face had been moved around, and “they”, perhaps, were trying to speak that way. In a circle at the end of January, there were further developments. The medium saw a bright light in her cabinet during the opening prayer, then she felt something being built up against her face again. After we heard a hymn, there was a loud explosive noise, and the keyboard recorded tune came on. We all denied touching the keyboard. As it played on, the medium felt very cold, then she asked permission of Spirit to turn it off, which we did. We all heard many click sounds, which sometimes the medium saw as lighting up the cabinet. Then, there was a very loud short explosive noise, two longer similar noises, and the keyboard song was switched on again! For several times now, the keyboard had always come on after what we called power surges, like explosive sounds. There had to be a connection. There followed an impressive series of power surges. Short, long, short, long, short, short, short, short. Other surges and a rumbling sound were heard, and the medium asked for the light to be switched on, because she was worried about what the intense sound meant. She asked “them” what they were doing with electricity. It was noticed that the cupboard next to her had been moved two inches away from the cabinet, but nothing on top of it had been disturbed. Had the noises anything to do with this, we thought. After the circle was closed, we heard attractive sounds like birdsong from the coil/crystal set/ amplifier/speaker, and a high-pitched “twittering” sound. This séance had produced very impressive phenomena, which I could not explain except in terms of an intelligent power behind it. The medium was a trusted trance channel, and seemed connected to all the paranormal events. Although some of the evidence was subjective to the medium and relied on trust, the objective events alone seemed guided, not random. It struck me that most of the paranormal events that had happened so far had been while the medium was fully conscious and taking part, singing, joking, asking for phenomena in a humorous way. Perhaps she had a part to play while conscious that she could not do while in trance. The Church then provided me with a bit of encouragement, when a medium said, “Your father is helping you a lot and patting you on the back. Do you heal, there is a man in a white robe, a higher guide, he is helping, there is lots of love around you.

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Besides healing, there is something else you want to do spiritually. You’re not retiring yet, there’s a lot more for you to do.” When I did healing after the service, I felt lots of heat and power going through me for my two patients. The next circle on Monday 12th February was run without the coil and crystal set, which had been requested by Flora, to concentrate on the circle and perhaps direct voice. There were a few “zings”, and during “Singing in the rain”, the medium said , “I’m honoured, I’m honoured. Come and sing with us one day.” She said he was not allowed to, but it was the singer of the song. She then felt someone with her, her back was like a ramrod, someone had a gingery moustache, he felt over 6 feet tall, and a 41 inch chest. This feeling was new to the medium.. I asked if he had ginger hair. She said he hasn’t gone up to my hair. I was thinking of my brother Raymond, as this description fitted. She then said, “ I want to do something. This gentleman did this. I could hear that.” She was drumming her fingers rapidly on the cabinet, making a drum-like sound. I said I recognised him. She said, “Did he have a rank or something, he keeps saying attention!” My deceased brother was mad about drumming, used to do it round the house, and had owned lots of jazz records featuring drummers. He had served in the Coldstream Guards at one time, then the Territorial Army for a long time. . This was a good means of recognition, I thought. The medium did not want clairvoyance in her circle, but it had happened. Red Arrow then spoke through the entranced medium, and our leader asked him what the noises were we had heard that evening, similar to those we usually heard. “ It is the magnetic field being picked up. You have heard the “zing”, I believe you call it, Norman. They are giving you the total magnetic field, that is there all the time, but to produce that sound takes quite a lot of energy.” I asked about the communicators who were behind the medium earlier. “ I do not know who they were. I know they were good souls, and I allowed them to use the channel’s body for a short while, not for speech at this point. They will speak, but we can only put the channel through so much. They were both tall gentlemen. They stretched her spine. She cannot take too much of this, or she’ll look very peculiar in the morning!” I then asked if they were connected to me, as I had thought. “ Yes they were. They are telling me they are still here. They give you encouragement and a good bearing. They uplift you, make you straight again, as the tree. You bend in the wind, but they are here to give you strength and uprightness”. On Saturday 2nd March, a Church message was given to me by a medium, from a man with one arm, saying “friend”, who was lonely at the end of his life, who had advanced on the other side, who said I grew flowers indoors. This was evidential from my deceased brother, who had apparently come through the medium, with the drumming, in a recent circle. He had lost an arm in an industrial accident, and had turned against me in his last years for no rational reason that I was aware of. I enjoyed indoor potted flowers. I got hold of Bob at work, to ask a few questions about the latest events., and listen to the tape.

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“ When we heard the ‘birdsong’, what was it, could it have been from a radio station like a call-sign?” Bob said no, they use a regular sound like a beacon, not irregular like ‘birdsong’. “ Is it possible for a power surge in the mains electricity to switch on the keyboard, which happened a few times in the circle?” If there is a mechanical button, I do not see how. If a logic circuit, on standby, it possibly could happen. “ I played the “zing” on tape to you, could it be feedback, or something else electronically known?” I It sounds a bit like feedback, and there is a lot of equipment powered up in the room. To make sure, switch off the amplifier, set your amp to no gain, and use a mains filter socket to eliminate interference from the mains. This was all done, ready for the next séance.

Chapter 12: I leave the Tesla circle For the Monday 4th March 1996 circle, I plugged a filter in to the mains, and connected all my equipment to this using a four socket extension. This meant that no unwanted “noise “ or surges in the mains supply would affect outputs. The oscilloscope was plugged in, and showed a straight line until the coil and crystal set were connected, when the right of screen showed a mass of sharp peaked lines , but the left side was blank. The volume was set low, and minimum gain, as Bob had said. “Zinging” started loud early, then clicks and power surges. The display was on the right side throughout. The readout changed slightly when zinging occurred. There was a buzz, a loud click, and the peaks went higher. More thumps and clicks, then an extremely long and loud power surge was heard, which shocked us, and the medium said something hit her in her solar plexus. She knew that they were building up for it. The music was turned down, the medium said hello, a click, then a word “more”, or “amour”, is on the tape. As she talked to “them”, there were a series of soft clicks. Clicks continued as we spoke as well. She was convinced that they were trying very hard to form words on a wave. There were no radio sounds. A loud crack was heard, which corresponded with a flash blip on the left side of the screen. This circle seemed to have proved that the phenomena were nothing to do with mains fluctuations, as so much had occurred despite the mains filter being used. The next séance produced the usual strange noises, but after the closing prayer there were extra “Amens” , to be heard on the tape recording later. There were four soft amens as one of us was speaking, then three more in louder voice, then a final three amens in a different voice again. This seemed to be a kind of electronic voice phenomenon, because it was confirmed that no sitter had said these words.

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The séances continued producing similar noises each week, some whispers which we thought could be attempted speech, and long conversations with various communicators, regarding our conduct of the circle. There followed a NAS seminar at Burton-on Trent, over Easter. After the evening meal, our medium felt like having table tilt there and then in the lounge, and they began to gather round with friends, I declined to join them, and said it should be done properly in a quiet dark room or not at all, in my opinion. It would be real contact with Spirit, and should be respected. The medium agreed, and asked a few NAS notables to join us in a bedroom. After the prayer, finger tips were placed on the table, and soon there were tremors in the table. I felt intense heat and facial tingles. The tremors got stronger We asked for one tilt for yes, and two for no. Letters were then provided by the number of tilts. A name Scott, then Lucy aged 7, was spelled out, known to Beryl and Brenda, then two more known to them. Next was a Horace, a relative of our circle leader, and the table rocked violently towards her until it was hitting her body. We had to pull it back to the middle. I then asked for all hands to be taken off the table, or only fingertips on , to prove it wasn’t us moving it, in the good but subdued light. A message for Brenda and Beryl ended up with the table on their laps. Lastly, there was a message from Freddie for our medium. The table rocked towards her. She asked where are you now?, and he spelled out by the table “In Heaven”. We sang one of his songs, and the table rocked very actively in to her lap for some time. She was an admirer of Freddie Mercury, and I had been told that he had come through our entranced medium before I joined the circle. I felt quite emotional about this. I thought that Spirit had taken the opportunity to encourage her to believe in her channelling ability. She was a doubter, and found it hard to believe that Spirit were “really there”. A bit like me really. After the lectures, I was selected to attend the Stewart Alexander séance for members. Two trumpets were seen flying about. One came down on our leader’s lap, and rolled around. A demonstration of de-materialising and re-materialisinga cable tie, to show a selected sitter,was performed by communicator Walter Stinson. Our leader then had a trumpet come to her, and a guide spoke through it and gave her name. It was her father, and a Harry was accepted. Them Jack, an uncle, was mentioned by the guide, and she said that he was miserable. The guide said he was a miserable old git, but then, an entity calling himself Jack said, through the trumpet, “ What a bloody cheek!” And other things. Seances continued, and at one “zinging” began early, there was a noise like a miaow, crackling, power surges, then a loud power surge and a piano note sounded. It was heard by us all, and could be heard on the tape. Red Arrow communicated and tried to persuade me to do automatic writing, so that I could get information from Michael. The other two were asked to continue trying, they were getting some success. In May, our circle travelled to Bath to attend another NAS meeting where Lincoln was demonstrating again. The voice and singing which sounded like Judy Garland was excellent again, and later Felix was said to have materialised. Someone walked round and shook some sitters’ hands. They said it felt like a man’s hand. The medium made gurgling noises, then a voice asked for Norm, then what sounded like Norman,

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and my boy. This fitted me, and I acknowledged. The voice said, “ I gave you lots of love, a close relationship”. To test the communicator, I said, “ Remember the chips Mum. And when I fed you when you were in hospital? “ The voice said, “ You brushed my hair”. I was sure I never did this. “ We are as close as it is possible to be, between your world and ours”. This was not evidence, but my mother had given me many messages by now through mediums. I was not sure if this message was for me, it did not feel right. My memories were not taken up at all. I then received a shocking letter from our circle leader, saying that the circle was cancelled. The medium had become extremely unwell, and if the circle continued it would be in Poole. They presumed I would not travel the extra distance, and maybe this is Spirit’s way of moving me towards forming my own circle. Lots of thanks for my dedication, and they would keep in touch. So it was over. But I still had the healing, and the Church. Perhaps it was meant to be, as I was often told.

Chapter 13: A lonely time My wife and I had separated within the house for about two years by now, and we were waiting for our divorce to be finalised. She wanted me to have custody of our teenage son, and I had to arrange sale of the house, then split the proceeds between us. I then had to find new accommodation, and start again on my own. At a Spiritualist Church service, I spotted Rose, who I had met once at a Workshop, and we’d worked together in a group where she had “tranced” and a guide had spoke through her. I said hello, she came over after the service, she talked about a Workshop she was going to, and that she was no longer in a circle. She confided some personal worries she had, and we agreed to see each other in the Church. She said that she does healing in her home, with some friends. When I saw her the following week, I proposed that we would be companions, as we had a lot in common, and felt comfortable with each other in conversation. This pleased her, and she said we would meet for spiritual interests, but she had a boyfriend. I gathered that Rose was another doubter about the reality of the Spirit World. It seemed that like attracts like. First there was Cindy, then the physical medium, and now Rose. I was still in regular contact with Cindy, and I was very pleased when we met up with her and family in the Church, and she had a good message there. It was from her sister. She rarely received a message, unlike myself. Her Downs Syndrome daughter also had a message. I spent a day with Rose, and she told me that she would like to transfigure, and use the energy of a circle , not do clairvoyance. She had been told that two male energies

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would help her. I suggested we have a meditation, and as I looked at her, her face kept changing and blanking, bigger and smaller. She said that a Chinaman was with me, and energy was around. Some friends invited me to go with them to a Mind, Body, and Spirit Exhibition in London, which was interesting, and we visited White Eagle Lodge later. I got to know Rose, and found that she had an ovarian cyst, very large, which required a major operation and 3 months recovery time. She was convinced that we were brought together to help and support, heal, physical phenomena, transfiguration perhaps, and Earth healing was strong with her. She pulls out negative energy from the Earth like a rope. It goes up, and turns in to good energy. People would think she was nuts, so she only tells those she can trust. She said we would sit, I would be leader, not her friend Paul, who was too busy. She then showed me an atlas where she had been told by Spirit there would be a disaster by plates moving within twenty years, fire and water, healing could help but not stop it. I gave her healing, and she said that her back pain had now gone. The next week, Rose asked me if I was going to Church. She was going with a boyfriend, but would like to see me there as a friend. So I went. He came to me, and said, “ Who is moving?” Me, I said. ( I was planning to sell my house). “ You have to move. Did a lady send you here tonight, or persuade you to come?” Yes, I said. I looked in Rose’s direction and we smiled. ( I had not intended to come before Rosemary rang me). “On the material, who is Cynthia?” A good friend, I said. “ You are opening and closing a book”. Yes. This was interesting, that the medium had given the unusual name of Cynthia, who had been my closest spiritual friend up to that time, and also given a reference concerning Rose. Later that month , Rose had her operation. I visited her in hospital, and later gave her healing. She said it was very effective. My old friend Moya had trained to be a counsellor, and we met again and talked about our different pathways. We meditated together with her husband, and there was lots of energy we thought. She “saw” my father on my face, and said he was very strict. True. Later, she said she saw a long “spout”, with oil or something coming out, a lot of green, and me in a white coat. I explained that I had been making some green coloured “gel” that day at work, and we use a lot of oil to make it, poured through a metal jug with a spout. I had been wearing a white lab coat. This was quite specific, and confirmed her psychic abilities which I had known before. As time went on, I had become attracted to Rose, but she did not wish to take our friendship further. I had felt very lonely lately, and had prayed for a partner. I had talked to a few friends how I felt, including two female colleagues. They talked about fixing me up with a blind date. I had written a letter and a cheque to apply to the local newspaper dating columns, to try to find someone, but had not posted it yet. That morning, my colleagues came to see me in great excitement.

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You know you are trying to meet someone,? they said. I was told all about Joanna, a sister-in –law of one of the ladies. I was given her number to ring, she was expecting a call from me, and she would like me to take her to the Spiritualist Church. Her mother had been a Spiritualist. I was shocked by this offer. Had it been inspired by Spirit? I had prayed for a partner. I decided to trust in Spirit, and I had nothing to lose anyway. The letter was not sent. I rang Joanna that evening, and she made it very easy for me, she was friendly and natural. She said she could not get out after 9pm, she went to a Cof E Church Sundays,Tuesdays and Wednesdays, had no car, was a home bod, had two children at home, and did not mind that I was much older. Our first date attending the Church was very pleasant, and we arranged another meeting. I liked her immediately, and thought that she felt the same. We had a chaste kiss goodnight, and I went home and meditated. I felt intense itchings and tingles all over my face, lips, chin, and forehead. I felt, or hoped, that this was my helpers, guides, Mum and Dad, approving of what I was doing, and meeting Joanna. We continued to date, and we got on very well. Jo was very practical and down-toEarth. She believed in Spirit and an afterlife, but was not really interested in evidence, she just believed. She was happy to take communion at services in her Cof E Church and asked me to go with her, but also to go to Spiritualist services. We went to the Spiritualist Church again soon afterwards. A medium went to her, and said that her mother was with her, she died of a heart attack, described her glasses, and that Jo had a brother. This all fitted and Jo accepted it. Jo told me that her mother had always attended this Church, and a family memorial to her had been included in a service there, after she had passed over, not long ago. Coincidentally, I had been present at that service, so had been in the same building as Jo before, without knowing it. At another service later in the month, the medium said that I knew my two guides. ( I didn’t). I was on the right pathway now, but had had worries. I did healing. Was I in a circle? ( Used to be). They’re saying you’re thinking of going in to a circle again, you have potential. I was now doing healing with Rose and Judith every week now, and also attended the Church as a healing trainee. Messages from mediums were given to me regularly, for encouragement. After healing at Rose’s one week, we meditated together in a soft red light, I saw her face change, and had facial tingles. Her hands moved about, and she spoke in some kind of altered awareness. I thought she might have “tranced” and have someone with her, so I tried to respond. “ You asked me to come”. Welcome, friend. “ The energies are good, there is also a good attitude. You have doubts, no matter how much evidence you have had. It’s the scientific mind, we can understand this. I want to give you blue. A passion flower. Look deep within the centre and let your mind wander to see the colours.” May I ask your name? “ You may, it is Simon.” Welcome, Simon. Are you a new guide, or helper, to the channel? “ I am new to her, but I have been here before. I am always around.” It was quiet for a while, then I saw her face “blacken” and energy around her I thought.

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A different voice then said, “ Norman, no tricks”. My face itched and tingled intensely. Rose gradually came round, and said she had been pulled in to deeper sleep near the end, but could remember some of the things she had said like in a dream. The healing was enjoyable for me. One week in Church, a patient told me that I had healed her bad stomach the previous week, it was now much better, and kissed me gratefully. She then asked me to heal her back, and when I did so I felt heat, especially in one place. She told me later that this was where the pain was . She cried afterwards, and said she wanted the warmth of my hands to go on and on. Later she told me that her back was OK now. This gave me a lot of encouragement that it was working, and I always seemed to feel better after doing healing as well. Despite this, I was not convinced that “Spirit” was really using me as a healing channel, I thought it was just as likely that my energy, or Universal Energy, was used in the healing. The next period from 1997 was dominated by finalising my divorce, then my relationship with Jo, ending up in marriage. She came to live with me, as I now had no need to sell the house. We shared our resources to compensate my ex-wife. So it was me, Jo, my son Matthew, and Jo’s two children, Lynsey and Tom. There was no circle for me now, but healing continued at Rose’s, and I still healed at the Church. In July 1998, I began sitting in a circle with Paul and Rose on Tuesdays. This did not really develop in to anything, and I left this in the November. We were still friends, and I was welcome to still come for healing sessions. I had to spend a lot of time on my physical life now, with the new family. I wondered if my spiritual search had finished. All opportunities seemed to have dried up. I was feeling very happy however, and no longer at all lonely. Jo and I socialised with my old friends Cindy and Moya, and also my new friend Rose. But then, out of the blue, the physical medium for our old Tesla circle got in touch with me again. She asked if I would like to sit with her in a physical circle, at my house. I thought this was meant to be, and could not turn it down, although I knew how tiring and expensive the 120 mile round trip was. It was agreed that me, Rose, and the medium would sit, to begin with. We were hoping to develop the medium, for direct voice. The first sitting was 4th November, 1999.

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Chapter 14: My own physical circle As a physical circle is normally held in the dark, and objective phenomena is the aim, there are opportunities for fraud to take place. This has happened in the past. A sceptic can never be sure that the seance conditions are not rigged, and that the people running it are honest. Here was an unexpected opportunity , as circle leader and owner of the circle, to set the conditions myself, and make sure that everything was totally honest. It seemed strange to me that we were all doubters about the existence of a Spirit World, despite all that the medium had done in the Tesla circle, and Rose bringing through communicators while in “trance.” Both of them doubted it was real Spirits after the event, they could not remember what they’d said, and did not wish to read my séance notes. As for me, I had received many evidential messages, and had observed many unexplained events, but still had many unanswered questions. Setting up a physical circle room is not easy. Not a chink of light is allowed in, so curtains, blinds etc have to be made to cover doors and windows completely. A cassette player , with appropriate music tapes, is recommended, to help “raise the vibrations”. A recording device is necessary, in this case a Sony recorder, with a flat microphone attached, to record the séance sounds. A lamp to produce dim red light. Tables and chairs. Someone to stay “awake” and operate the equipment, which was me. Anyone can begin a physical circle, but it is best to include someone with known abilities for physical mediumship. Even then, phenomena may not occur for months or years, and sitters may have to wait in patience. Dedication is paramount, towards the objectives, through the development of whatever medium or energy is present. Our séance room upstairs was about 9 feet square, with one window and a door, which were curtained, and taped on the edges. I sat in a corner, with a table on my right with the lamp and Sony recorder. On my left was the cassette player with the

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music tape. The medium sat on my right in front of a chest of drawers, and Rose sat facing me in front of a radiator. We were hoping to achieve direct voice, but we expected communicators to guide us, and we would see what happened, and analyse the recorded tapes carefully. I opened the first circle in prayer, and we sat quietly listening to the tape, with the red lamp on. Rose was breathing heavily and her right hand was clenched. She had someone with her, who we welcomed, and who said her name was Elizabeth. She was here to help us. The red light and music was alright, and we could have a table in the middle. A request came for Rose to change places with the medium, so that she would sit in front of the lamp. I felt very warm, and tickly tingles were on my face. There was nothing “extra” on the recorded tape. The circle continued until October 2000. Various communicators came through both the medium and Rose, and they seemed to work together as a pair. Various sounds and words that could not be accounted for were heard on the recorded tape at times. Advice and instructions were given, and the circle increased in size. The conversations with communicators, and other interesting occurrences, would fill another book, but there were some very special occasions. On 20th July 2000, Rosemary suggested that we have a table tilt with the red light on. I was delighted by this, as I had hoped it would happen here one day. A round wooden table was cleared and placed in the middle. Present were the medium, Rose, Pam, and myself. We all placed fingers on the table, and singing began. Suddenly, the table rocked towards the medium, and it was not us doing it. Rosemary then asked, “ Do you have a message for someone? If so, tilt once, please”. It tilted once. Medium: “Is it for Norman?” No tilt, but raps are on the recorded tape. Norman: “ It is one rock for yes, isn’t it?” Tilt, and a rap on tape. Rose: “We could go through the alphabet. Have you a message for Pam, if so, rock once. No tilt. “ Is it for the medium?” No tilt. “Is it for Rose?” No tilt. Medium: “Do you have a message for the whole circle?” One tilt towards her. Rose: “ Shall we go through the alphabet?” One tilt. The medium started to call out letters, and it tilted once at S. She continued this, and an I and a K were given one tilt. We checked it was SIK so far, and got one tilt. Next letters given were E and S, so we asked confirmation if it was Sikes. One tilt told us yes. Medium: “ Is that your name?” Tilt. Rose: “ Is that Mister?” One tilt. Medium: “It’s not Eric Sykes is it?” No tilt. She then called out letters for his Christian name, and it tilted at N. Medium: “Is it Norman Sikes?” Tilt. “Are you well?” Tilt. “ I’m very glad you came tonight. Is the circle progressing OK ?” Tilt. “Is it OK if we ask questions?” Tilt. Rose: “ Have you come alone, Mr Sikes? Table rocked quickly and repeatedly. “So you brought friends with you?” Tilt. Mediumi: “You’re all very welcome, are you working with the circle?” Tilt. “ Are you in charge of the physical phenomena?” Tilt. “Is my Dad here, Mr Sikes?” Tilt. “That’s nice. Is my Zak here?” No tilt.

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Pam:“Is my Dad there?” Tilt. “How about my Mum, is she here too?” Tilt. Medium: “ Is Norman’s Mum here?” Tilt. Rose: “Is my brother here?” No tilt. Medium: “ Is George Chapman here?” No tilt. Pam: “ Hello Dad, if you’re there I miss you”. Tilt. The table then repeatedly tilted and rocked towards Norman, moved towards him, and hit against his stomach. All hands were either right off the table, or only lightly touching. Norman thanked whoever was rocking the table against him. The table then went on one leg, and moved along the floor, rocked violently as though dancing, and got stuck on Norman’s chair. It was placed back in the middle, but then it rocked quickly in to the medium’s lap. Norman: “ Do you have a message for the circle?” Tilt. Rose: “ Shall we go through the alphabet?” No tilt. Norman: “Is the message, that you are showing us you’re here, by this method of communication?” Tilt. “Was Rosemary inspired from your side to suggest doing this?” Tilt. “ Should we do this every week?” No tilt. Rose: “Was I inspired because we wanted evidence of your presence?” Tilt. Norman: “Did you put the name, Tina, on to the tape last week?” No tilt. Medium: “Did Spirit put the name on the tape?” Tilt. “We send you our love Mr Sikes, do you send us yours?” Tilt. “You’re very welcome, as you come in love. Are they happy with the way the circle is going?” Tilt. “Do you want us to have the red light on?” No tilt. “Do you have someone with you?” Tilt. “Shall we continue as we have been doing?” No tilt. More questions were asked about conditions, but there were no tilts. Norman: “Are you waiting to get an answer from your friends?” Tilt. “They may be debating it now”. No tilt, but a click is on tape. Rose: “Can you see somebody on my right, Di?” Yes. “They’re taking me over actually. Medium: “The message will come through you, then.” During the hymn “Be thou my vision”, we welcomed a friend speaking through Rose. They were worried that we were beginning to waver in our beliefs, especially Norman. Medium said, “Is that why you kept hitting him in the stomach?” “ I am part of the energies which you call ‘I am’. My friend here has been given an insight in to ‘I am’. Explanations can be made later. You will see upon the person of my instrument ‘I am’.” A click follows on the tape. I could see Rose’s face changing, and said so, Pam also saw change. The communicator said that it was made up of ectoplasm and other energies. We thanked ‘I am’, who said that this instrument was particularly good to work with. The medium said that’s good, and we were told that was another reason for the red light. Music was resumed, the medium began to “go off”, and said someone was sitting on her knee. A double click is heard on the tape, and the table started rocking violently again. We asked if it was Norman Sikes again, and got one tilt. Rose: “ When we had Tina last week on tape, was that the Tina I know, in Spirit?” Tilt. “ Was that why I thought about Brian the next day?” Tilt. “Thank you Tina, that’s brilliant”.

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Pam asked if Rose knew Tina very well, and was told that she was a client who died very young. Rose: “Are you here tonight Tina?” No tilt. Norman: “Will you tilt once for yes, or twice for no?” Two tilts. Rosemary: “Will you give my love to Tina please?” Tilt. The table started rocking again. We asked if anyone wanted to speak through the medium. A tilt answered us. Music was turned off, and “Dorothy” spoke through the medium. Norman was told that he should start believing more, and that a lady would not leave her alone, she just keeps on about chips, chips, chips! This made perfect sense to me, to do with my mother. Instructions were given about the room setup for next week, and that ended a most remarkable séance as far as I was concerned. I had been in total control of the physical conditions, so knew there was no fraud. I wondered what the arch-sceptics would have made of the session. I would have loved James Randi, Richard Dawkins, and a few others to have witnessed it. Tonight was a triumph of the highest order. I looked back at the previous week’s account, and listened to the tape again. The same sitters had been present. Early on in the seance, the medium and Rose seemed to be going off, and Pam said she was going deep herself. Then there was a double click noise, recorded on the tape. Pam said what’s that? Then I said what’s that? Then, clearly on the tape can be heard , “It was Tina”. Pam said that she could hear whispering very clearly from near Rose, and later Rose said she could hear someone whispering . I heard a clear whisper as well, and on tape there are some sounds like whispering or breathing softly. I had told Rose about the words when I had transcribed the tape, and she said she knew a Tina in Spirit. The medium unexpectedly decided to leave us, after about ten months. She had her own reasons for doing so, and I knew how expensive it was for petrol, having travelled to her house for six months. It is also very tiring after a day’s work. I was so disappointed that I made a hasty decision to close the circle down. We had no physical medium, Rose was a trance medium and one-time message-giver, Pam had as yet unknown gifts, and Clive had just joined and was clairvoyant. It seemed likely that a reformed circle would be of a mental nature, and I felt unable to host this without a suitable medium present. They were disappointed, but nobody offered to host it instead, or suggest a medium to help us. In 2004, I was invited to join a new group of interested people, mainly healers, to help them try table tilting. It was a complete failure, although we tried twice under similar conditions. So- it’s not that easy! I wondered whether the physical medium had been responsible for the table tilt, or whether Rose could do the same. It seemed that I did not have the gift. But I had proved the paranormal, and would never doubt it again.

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Chapter 15: More than messages After my physical circle ended in October 2000, I had resigned from Church healing. I had passed the C17 theory course, and trained for two years, but to become registered I had to be assessed and tested by SNU officials, who would decide whether I could heal or not. This reduced my enthusiasm at the time. My spiritual search was then limited to occasional attendances at Church services, watching a few TV psychic programmes, and reading many more books about the paranormal, and Spiritualism and it’s people and history. Over the next nine years, several messages were offered to me through a variety of mediums, confirming Spirit’s ongoing relationship with our world, and their interest in our daily affairs. I mainly went to Church to enjoy the peace with like-minded people, although really I felt I had no need of any more messages. The interested reader can examine them for himself or herself, in Appendix1. These followed the messages included in my first book, “Spirit Messages”. . My physical life was very busy with my new family, and the change of arrangements for our children resulted in a certain amount of friction in the home. At the same time, Jo was striving to advance in her nursing position, and we were improving the house to suit us both. I found that I had changed, in such a way that I was much better able to deal with the problems. I could see where the philosophy of the Spiritualist Movement had affected me for the better. Unexpectedly, I happened to meet Rose again in the Church, in 2006. We had lost touch, except for Christmas card exchange. I invited her round, and we caught up on our spiritual news. I told Rose that I had typed up all my spiritual search activities up to now, was considering getting some of it published, and no longer healed in the Church. Rose said that she no longer healed in her home.

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We began to meet nearly every week as spiritual friends, which was supported by Jo, to allow me to pursue my interest in the spiritual. One day, Rose rang me and encouraged me to write a book about the messages from Spirit I had received, taken from the total record. We could not think of a selling point for the book. I did not want to make money from it, but equally could not afford to lose a lot either. A specialist Spiritualist publisher was approached, and it could be done for £1500 up front from me, and they would help me to sell it. I felt a great urge to give back what I had received, to as many as possible. It would be unique, in that it would describe accurately messages to me from mediums, and my personal connections and reactions to the information, positive or negative. Rose thought how lucky I had been with the amount of messages, and the quality in many cases. I had no confidence that it would be interesting enough for people to want to read, as I felt I was ordinary and had no following. I completed the book, and eventually published it in 2007 on the internet, for anyone to read for free. I called it Spirit Messages, on the site vbook.pub.com.

I felt that Rose and I were meant to work together in the future, in a different way. Without her support and encouragement I would not have published the Spirit Messages book. We will carry on searching, wherever it leads. We should never stop learning, about both the physical and spiritual worlds. There was always a thought that the remainder of my recorded experiences might be the subject of a follow-up book, which was intended to have a wider appeal for a curious, interested searcher. Much more than “just messages” had happened. As a result of feedback and interest resulting from the Spirit Messages book, this sequel was gradually compiled to complete the story. Looking back, I believe that the best explanation of all the experiences I had during the search is that the Spirit World and it’s people were intelligently behind it all. If not Spirit, what else could it have been? There are many theories about how it all works, but my wide reading did not supply a plausible alternative. The most common theory I have read is that the mediums and sitters produce all the phenomena themselves in some way, with scientifically unknown energies. In my view, this just creates another mystery which is harder to understand, and makes it harder to fit the facts together. Much more advanced and spectacular physical phenomena than outlined in my experiences have been described in many books. See the Appendix 2 booklist, for some of the many books which impressed me. I felt that my personal contact with “them” was limited to having very strong urges to carry out this work of searching and recording, feeling tingles and itches at significant times, seeing facial changes on certain people, and was probably connected with the sensations when I was doing healing. I don’t know if I ever gave a true message when I was trying out mediumship, but it is possible. Most of my experiences were supplied by mediums, seemingly in contact with Spirit. I gradually became more and more convinced that Spirit might be working with me. The weight of evidence, and my reading about paranormal investigations, forced me

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to accept that the Spirit hypothesis is the most consistent and acceptable explanation of what happened during my search . On the way, there were highs and lows, and spells when nothing seemed to be happening, but great interest and excitement at times. I met many like-minded people to enrich my life, and there were many connections which helped me forward and may have been inspired from the Spirit World. I feel that the search has been the main cause of me being extremely fortunate in my personal life and development. I have a lot to thank it for. And/or Spirit perhaps. I hope so. You, the reader, can search as I did, if you choose to. It is all available to you, even more so with all the on-line information available. If you don’t seek, you won’t find. There is a certain amount of faith in me now, which was not there before. We will not know all the truth until we pass, but we can walk nearer to it while on Earth. And so ended the first chapter of investigation,. My scepticism had been much reduced. The searching continued. My new wife told me that she had been given the spiritual name of FAITH in a Spiritualist Church, when she was a baby. A nice coincidence. The motto of the CFPSS, which had featured in my early searching, was “ To Faith add Knowledge”.

The End ( Of the beginning)

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Appendix 1: Messages from spiritual mediums At Church in November 2000, my face itched and tingled, which had not happened to me lately, before a medium, Joyce Withall, came to me with a message. “ You are big-hearted, and a sense of humour has got you through, it is gentle after a breakup, you have started a new path. Your father is saying ‘Pack up your troubles in an old kit bag’. Your intuition is correct now.” My father usually comes through as a military man, and the song mentioned was popular in World War 1 . Coincidentally, father stored soot in kitbags when he swept chimneys in later life. I had started a new path, having married again, and it felt gentle and good. I was pleased to hear my intuition was working. Wendy Palmer was the next to give me a message, on 28th April 2001. “ I have with me a man, well-built, working in a factory, he had a bad accident. A younger family member is angry about something, a resentment against you, he is male. Are you unsure what to do with yourself, for your work? Do your eyes itch, have you had them checked lately? Do you drive a car? Have you checked the tyres lately, seriously they are saying you need to check, you’re having a soft bumpy ride.” The man described fitted my brother, who lost some fingers in a cutter in a factory which led to amputation of his hand . He had come through several times before. My son was resentful against me and my new wife, as he did not get on with her. I had taken early retirement, but this could have referred to my spiritual searching perhaps. My eyes do itch sometimes, and a tyre was a bit soft when I checked. There was then a long gap before my next message, on 2nd February, 2002, as I was attending Church less often. The medium was Marilyn Webb. “ There has been a parting of the ways. There is the letter M in the family. Someone is sad around you, but will improve. You are healing just by being

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there. A man with me, you helped him before his death. A strong tall man is helping you, lots of power. An Arthur on other side, Peter on this side.” My divorce, and marrying a M for McDonald, could account for part of this. My son is named Matthew. My stepdaughter was having serious problems, and I was trying to support her. The name Arthur had been given before but not recognised, but Peter could have been my cousin again. I helped my father-in-law just before his death. Diane Orchard was the next medium to give me a message, on 8th March 2002. “ Do you have a ring? They say, take it off. Do you get tingles on your face and ears? I have a man with me, with bad stomach pain, died from it.” My divorce could explain the ring reference. Tingles on the face often happens to me when in Church, and elsewhere, as said before. My brother died from colon cancer, which is very painful. On 6th September, Sylvia Thorne gave me the next message. I had experienced facial tingles earlier. “ Your father has passed. Are you still writing? He’s saying, just write it down, do you feel inspired? Do you know your guides and helpers? He’s saying you are too analytical . He was not in to this, did not believe. He’s close to you, from the other side.” Linda Abbott was the medium on 2nd November 2002, and gave me this message. “ I have a brother with me, not like you, chalk and cheese! You are an old soul, learned all your lessons, you listen well, have good healing powers, you are much more patient now, and it’s time to help others, it is not time to go over yet. There will be a celebration in one or two weeks time.” My brother, as described earlier, was totally different to me and I did not get on with him. I attended my son’s degree presentation ceremony ten days later. My next Church message was by Chris Pugh on 3rd January 2003. My head was itching and tingling before the service, so I thought once again that I had a good chance of a message. He selected me. “ Your father is standing behind you. He was a strong character, but did not express his emotions to you. A Bill or William, a stubborn strong man, is with him. Do you have links with Scotland? There are hospital links around you. There is a problem around you, you can deal with it in two ways. You will make the right decision, don’t worry , it will work itself out. A Mary, on this side? A Peter, about 43, who will help you financially. A lady, stout in the middle, apron folded over. The name of George is given me.” (63) Father and his name was given again. Uncle Bill again. Probably a reference to my stepdaughter’s problems . My wife was working as a nurse in a hospital. Mary I did not understand. The stout lady I could place, but there was no other evidence with it. Peter I could not place with that description. My wife’s ancestry is probably Scottish, by her surname of McDonald. On 21st June 2003, David Appleton, who was local and known to me , selected me for a message. He knew nothing about my relatives. “ I have a man with me, was in engineering. He was not just shop floor, but higher, where they were making things. They’re telling me you have had toothache, I’ve got it, it aches. There’s a lady, 5’-4”, hair down low, very slim, in

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the garden. Have you been cutting a hedge or branches? He’s been with you, helping and watching. I’m getting chest pains, like a heart attack, from him. But he says he found it hard to breathe before that, his body was closing down. You were quite close to him. He’s talking about a song, ‘Put another nickel in, in the nickleodeon’ does this mean anything to you? My father-in-law was an engineer who became a planner in the management of a factory. I had been suffering from toothache, and it had been extracted the previous day. My father-in-law did have breathing problems before his death, could not whistle as he liked to, and an autopsy found that he had motor neurone disease. The song meant nothing to me, except that he knew I played a keyboard a lot, and there is a line in the song with ‘music,music, music’ in it. Marilyn Webb gave me a message at SSC on 16th August 2003. The left side of my face itched and tingled, as I thought of Mum and Dad, and my father-in-law and his wife, hoping they might come through the medium. “ I have a quiet man with me, worked all his life, not rewarded , but more so over there. He’s saying a young boy came in to your life, he had a hard upbringing, you’ve made a difference and supported him. You are cynical, but lots of love is around you, and you need to open up more. Names of Mary and Robert given. A man is also here, a broken arm in plaster, giving name of Michael. I don’t like giving guides, but a very strong Chinese man is with you. You have been in a circle. You’ve a lot more to do yet. Do you ever wonder why you’re here? You don’t want to come back here again do you? It could have been my father-in-law again, especially as the young boy he mentioned could have been his grandson , my stepson. Mary I did not place, but Robert was the name of my wife’s ex-husband’s. On 6th September, my wife Joanna came to Church with me, and Geoff Hayward was the medium. He came to Joanna near the end of the service. “ I have a lady with me, is your mother in Spirit? She is lively, a good communicator, and took a lot of responsibility at home. She is giving the name of John. Your Mum is worried about John, you are the capable one, to keep an eye on him. You have improved your financial situation to ensure the future. Do you have any Scottish connections? I have a lady with a broad Scottish accent. Did your mother have any interest in the Scottish connection? You don’t have a Scottish accent. Can I take it your Scottish connections were further back, on your father’s side? Also a Mrs Shaw you will find on your father’s side. I am being given a Scottish name, McDonald.” ( Joanna has a brother named John. Her maiden name was McDonald. On 14th February, a medium whose name I failed to record said to me: “Your father and mother are with me. Do you do healing? Your Dad wants to change, and be more like you.” At a service on 1st May 2004, the right side of my face itched and tingled all evening. Shirley Olive selected me for a message. “ I have Cissie Howden with me. I want to go to the gentleman with the polished head, that is how she would speak! (Laughter). A young girl, disabled, is with her. She is helping to look after her. You have a William in Spirit. Your television is playing up lately. They know what’s going on.”

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Cissie was well known to me from the other local Church, and she had a good sense of humour. The medium served that Church and knew her, and might have remembered seeing me there, in fact she gave me a message there in 1996. My friend Cindy had a deceased disabled daughter, who I believe was known to the medium when she served the Swindon Church. William could have been Uncle Bill again. My TV picture had been bad, due to a faulty Sky dish. Mervyn Quinn selected me for a message at SSC on 22nd May 2004. “ I have a man who passed with a stroke. You need some uplifting, you’re a bit low. Have you been decorating? A lady is with me, short, wearing glasses, with bad painful legs. I feel it myself, take it away! They have been laughing at your efforts with the wallpaper. Is there another room to do? June will be better for you, a depression will be lifted. At Christmas, do you have a family get together? They will be there with you.” The man with a stroke was not understood, or my feeling low. The lady could have been mother or mother-in-law. I had been stripping wallpaper with a steamer, ready for wall plastering. This was completed in June. My brother and sisters and families always meet up together at one pub, at Christmas. On 21st August 2004, Marilyn Webb at SSC selected me for a message. “ You have a tribe of Red Indians with you, in full regalia. I don’t give guides as a rule. Your father is with me, he is very proud of what you’ve done in the last year. You’ve stopped writing though haven’t you? Poetry is it? It will come back, you have to deal with your Earth life. You have done healing, that’s on hold also isn’t it? Your father has respect for you, but you wouldn’t want to get on his wrong side.” I had stopped writing poems for the local newspaper, and about spiritual activities. Healing had also stopped. On 28th August 2004, Lorna Woods selected me for a message. “ A man is with me, bad breathing in the chest area, very active earlier in his life and didn’t mope around, saying you had a meeting of minds with him. He gave you a ring. He is showing a box, a jewellery box. He is saying there is another ring in it as well. There was loneliness. You lived in several houses. Was there a lilac tree where you grew up?” (71) My father-in-law had suffered breathing problems before his death as said before, and I got on well with him. I respected his ability to make anything with his hands, and although he was an atheist we discussed survival. I have lived in several houses, and a lilac tree grew in one of them. He gave me and his daughter two rings which had belonged to his wife, and we had them altered for our wedding rings. On 21st May 2005, Richard Holmes came to me with a message. “ Do you understand a monk with you? There is someone here with lots of letters after his name, PH D’s etc.? He’s saying you need to expand your knowledge. You need to see things more in black and white, you make it too complicated. Your grandfather, mother’s side, was an educated man.” Nothing was understood in this message. My grandfather was a farm labourer’s son with little education. David Appleton delivered the next message on 10th December 2005.

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“ A man is with you, in his 70’s, you had a friendship, to do with engineering or physics. He’s getting closer now, he had a little moustache. To show he’s here, he says your left leg has a problem, pain or stiffness? You are doing a lot of research, not to make money, and reading books. He had breathing problems, and slowly everything was closing down, a bit at a time. You get tingles down your face and on your head. You know, they are coming close to you, from Spirit. There are more, your mother. She is saying there were five sisters. Does August 9th mean anything? And May or Mave?” My father-in-law died in his 70’s, and he was an engineer which we had in common. He had a small moustache when I knew him. I did have a stiff left leg, as a result pf too much jogging. Research and reading this subject was still ongoing as for years. There were four sisters including my mother, as far as I knew. I had a neighbour once, named May. The next message was from Sharon Spence, on 28th January 2006. “ You’ve been doing a lot of decorating lately. I have a man with me, 5’-9 or 10, balding, not much hair in sides, showing medals on his chest, more than one. There is another man, fatherly, loved his garden, had a difficulty walking, and was very practical. There is someone else, older than you, is it an uncle, you fell out with him. You don’t know where you are at the moment, you are starting to look at a new project, this project will have two sides to it, will go two ways. Also a lady, not tall, she used to feed you up well and spoil you. I am shown a fire bucket with sand in it. You like old films. I am shown camps, like Army, or Butlin’s. You need to see a doctor, but you won’t.” I had been renovating the house. The man showing medals was father’s usual way to be recognised, and he was as described. The other man could be my father-in-law as described. My elder brother had fallen out with me in a big way. My mother suffered a bad fire, which could explain the fire bucket. I should have seen a doctor about my left knee, but hadn’t bothered. I had been studying physical mediumship again, and had joined the Zerdin Fellowship. I was also thinking of writing up properly all my messages and their meaning, as they seemed to be coming to a natural end. This might involve writing two books. On April 12th at Church, Shirley Olive gave me this message. “ I have a mother figure, helping you. You didn’t get on with all in the family! They liked a drink or two. ( My brother disowned me before he passed over, and used to drink heavily.) “ They’re talking about a Morris Minor”. ( I owned a Morris Minor when I lived close to my brother, and had taken him out in it.) “ Does Beaulieu mean anything?” ( Only that I had been there with my first wife). “ I have a spastic girl, handicapped, very affectionate”. ( Eve was the daughter of my friend Cindy, who suffered from Down’s Syndrome and died quite young). “ A Brian, who came to this Church?” ( I had only known one Brian at the Church, and had given him a message during the open circle we went to.). “ Your father is here, wearing a uniform”. ( Again his usual greeting). “ You have a light for healing around you, do you heal? Are you in a circle? ( Not now). In June, Jackie Mecke was the next medium to give me a message at the Church.

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“ Your mother is behind you, and another lady who passed with cancer. She’s helping you find your pathway. You’re a cynic, and have had depression. The hardest thing you’ve had to do is to move away from someone. I am being told Dorothy and the red shoes. Why? Your brother is here, he did not like to talk about his feelings. Your father is here also, he was the same, but he wished he had, he loved you. He had a hard life, and mother.” Mother’s favourite sister passed with cancer. Divorcing was very difficult and scary, and Dorothy was my wife’s name. She had owned some red shoes. My brother keeps coming through to me, why I thought, he hated me at the end of his life. Father and mother did have very hard lives, and had big families. In 2009, Jackie Mecke gave me another message in Church. “ A lady, your mother, is concerned you are worrying about something. Hospitals? ( Yes). “ Your father is proud of you, helping. You have a son, a bit apart, keep knocking on his door! Two children with you. You’ve turned your life around, your wife makes you laugh and gets you going. You’re reserved but she gets you out of yourself. Your father likes your wife, though he never met her on this side of life”. I thought this was very good evidence. My wife was very stressed working as a nurse in a hospital, and it was worrying me, the effect in her health. My son had gone to live on his own and did not like my wife, therefore I had to “knock on his door” if I wanted to see him. Jo’s two children had left home, but we still helped them more than my son My new wife had drawn me out of myself to socialise more with our families and our friends. I was very pleased that my father liked my wife, and they had never met on this side of life.

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Appendix 2: Some influential books about mediumship “ Is there an Afterlife”. David Fontana. “ On the edge of the etheric”. Arthur Findlay. “Materialisations”. Harry Boddington. “ Life after death- living proof”. Tom Harrison. “ They walked among us”. Louie Harris. “ The story of Helen Duncan”. Alan Crossley. “ Voices in the dark”. Leslie Flint.

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