Fractionation Principles

“The 15 Principles” The Guide To Ultimate Success With Women

By Derek Rake, Neil Guevara & James Lee Copyright © Derek Rake Publishing, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Notice: This guide is to be shared among members of the Derek Rake Platinum Coaching Group only. DO NOT DISTRIBUTE.

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ike most men, I used to always believe that being nice will get me inside a woman's pants. It‟s the social programming that‟s almost a given in any culture. You start out fearing that you‟re never good enough, and then you discover that women don‟t always fall for men who are good for them.

But after all the bad rep about being raised as a “too nice” guy who can‟t figure out what women think, it does have its perks. At the very least, the basics of respect get ingrained into your subconscious, which means that you can never become a total a-hole with women. This also means you know how transforming into a “bad boy” is not literal. You only need to increase your potential as a quality guy, put a bit of edginess in your personality, and be more vocal about your opinions to make women fall all over you (even if this isn‟t your initial intention).

Self-improvement comes only when you can build on what you already have, and this is what you‟re going to learn today.

Principle #1. The Mystery of How Women Think

The way women think is a mystery, and we can‟t be blamed for that. Women say one thing and mean another thing. They throw a comment like wanting a rich, handsome boyfriend, but end up getting attracted to not-so-handsome and financially challenged men. If you‟re like most guys, there‟s probably nothing that prepared you for the reality of hooking up with girls for sex or for lasting relationships. You also probably think that most women don‟t know what they want.

Here‟s a little secret: women do know what they want from men, but they don‟t realize that attraction is not a conscious choice. They still get drawn to men who show specific traits they subconsciously want, even if they don‟t necessarily see these men as „quality‟ from a logical point of view. For instance, they want men who can provide for a

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good future, yet they get attracted to a guy who looks like a pauper but is passionate about his lifestyle and hobbies.

Principle #2. Be Alpha

Over the years, I realized that the attraction switch inside a woman‟s brain gets turned on by a strange factor called „potential‟. This factor, when mixed with masculinity and assertiveness, will land you a date with the girl of your dreams. It‟s no surprise that the old adage “just be nice” doesn‟t really work.

Don‟t get me wrong. You don‟t have to act like an asshole to get women‟s attention. You just have to avoid being needy, desperate and validation-hungry around women. There‟s a whole world of difference between being afraid to impose and being a jerk. You just have to personify the traits of an Alpha guy. Be the man who does not need women to tell him he‟s cool to be cool. An alpha male gets noticed anywhere because he looks like someone who can walk confidently towards a goal.

The good news for most guys who want to develop these Alpha traits is this: seduction becomes easier once you have transformed into an Alpha male. While the nitty gritty of seducing women still requires good conversation skills and a lot of daring on your part, studying the concepts of seduction and practicing the routines you can use to turn women on.

Principle #3. It All Starts With The Approach

The nerdiest, most awkward guy in your graduating class can easily attract and date beautiful women if he puts himself in a position wherein he can meet women. Be where the women are and don‟t be picky about the location. Whether it‟s your cousin‟s wedding or a community barbecue fair, be there mingling with people and getting introduced to girls. You will meet most people through your circle of friends and family members, but don‟t pass on social gatherings and 3|P a g e

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community that could lead to a fated meeting with your dream girl. Go online and keep your eyes open to opportunities that may arise just by browsing, writing on forums and entertaining queries in social networks. The main difference between the guys who get the girls and the guys who dream of getting girls has something to do with the initiative to actually reach out to people in every possible way.

Don‟t be afraid to simply be around women. Normal conversation will tune you in to their vibe, so that chatting with women soon becomes second nature. When you exhaust your resources, do you simply give up and stop meeting women? The answer is no. You have to pull yourself together and learn how to cold approach women. I‟m talking about total strangers you meet daily on the way to work, in the café after work, or in the parking lot while you‟re going back to your car. The act of putting one foot after the other to approach a girl will train you to get rid of your nervousness around women. Simply looking out your window and looking at a hot chick passing by will make you more aware of a girl‟s presence.

Turning to a girl seated next to you to start a conversation may seem difficult at first. You may believe that you are intruding into another person‟s personal space, but the thing is, no person has ever been coldly met just by asking for directions or the time. Have a welcoming smile ready and be prepared for a conversation anytime. Most women delight in being approached, and will become receptive to you if your energy is positive and your charisma is turned on.

Principle #4: Overcoming Approach Anxiety Will Get You Halfway There

If you‟re still finding it hard to approach women, you may be afflicted with the phenomenon called Approach Anxiety. This is the irrational fear that most guys feel whenever they try to approach beautiful girls. You might be familiar with the symptoms by now… your heart hammering inside your chest, your face pale at the thought of getting rejected and you‟re stuttering like a 3-year-old on his first stage performance. It‟s particularly difficult to talk and think straight, much less compose a series of conversation lines that make sense. As a 4|P a g e

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result, the girl you‟re talking to feels bad for you, and will not even give you the chance to explain why you‟re nervous. Girls know about approach anxiety. They spend time with their girlfriends laughing about it. The rare female who will understand your apparent shyness will stay with you for a while then leave you when she finds someone else who won‟t bore her with pointless, tense conversation.

The bad vibe created by Approach Anxiety will make you unattractive. It doesn‟t matter if you bought a new outfit, smell your best and look like a debonair bachelor… if you let Approach Anxiety take over while you‟re in conversation with a girl, you‟re done for.

So how do you solve this? First you must understand that Approach Anxiety is an emotional state that weakens the physical. If you let this creepy feeling eat you up, you will come across as weird and unapproachable. Fortunately, this fear can be cured with practice. Approach strangers relentlessly and don‟t let go of any opportunity to talk to women. Do this frequently, almost obsessively, until the fear evaporates into thin air. After this strict exercise, you can approach any girl at any time, for any reason. Repeated exposure to women will also make you immune to the fear of rejection. The best part of it is that eventually, your skill will improve and you‟re going to be successfully closing any interaction with a phone number exchange, a promise to meet again sometime, or a kiss. Each success will bring added confidence. Soon, you‟re so confident that you can approach a group of girls and not feel nervous. Your positive vibe will lead to a positive reaction every time. You‟ll find yourself enjoying the company of women hanging on to your every word.

Don‟t be scared of rejection. Embrace the fact that you can get rejected, but it‟s not a big deal. Re-affirm your attractiveness every time you get rejection and learn how to transform the negative experience into a dry run of the real thing. You will soon learn a lot about how women handle men, and getting rejected for any reason is one step to getting there.

Principle #5: The Anxiety Deactivator 5|P a g e

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One of the most drastic ways to deactivate Approach is to move in for an introduction as soon as you see a girl. In less than 5 seconds, you should be able to approach your target and introduce yourself. This technique is popular among most guys because it effectively reduces approach anxiety. How can you get anxious about approaching when you‟ve already approached a girl? The idea is to make your move before you got nervous. This way, your mind will not be able to go in panic mode. It‟s a start in the right direction. Put on a smile, move close to your target and dish out your opener.

Another way of busting approach anxiety is to practice in a strange environment. If you‟re not bothered that someone you know might see how you bomb, you won‟t feel pressured to “do a good job” at approaching. On your trip to a new city, visit a nearby pub or a grocery and just get to know women.

One last reminder about approach anxiety: most of us don‟t really get over it. However, you‟re the only one who knows that. Your transformation from a nervous guy to a confident alpha male has something to do with the way women perceive you. If you can squelch down your approach anxiety before it completely debilitates you, women will think nerves don‟t affect you at all. Getting rid of your fear will take time. That‟s not a problem. The important thing is you learn from your mistakes. It might take you a few years before you can fully eliminate approach anxiety from your system, but if you learn how to cope, no one will really know it‟s there.

Soon, approaching women and taking control of your anxiety will become very easy. You might even find it fun (and funny) in the long run. Think of approaching women as an adventure that you can tell your friends about. It doesn‟t matter if you get rejected; your rejection will simply turn into another anecdote you can share with your friends. If your goal is to create more excitement in your life, look out for a romantic adventure that you can find in the strangest places. My best pick up experiences happened when I least expected.

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Adopting a confident attitude around women is an awesome skill for any guy to master. Think of it as a personal development lesson, one that you yourself taught. If you don‟t learn how to approach, you will never improve in your game. The more frequently you put yourself out there, the faster you will develop your Game.

Principle #6: Train Your Mind

The first step to training your mind and transforming your thought process is to always think of yourself as an attractive person. It all starts with a positive mindset and a winning attitude. Most athletes are trained to never think about defeat at the start of the competition. You can do the same. A self-defeating mindset will create a negative vibe around you. Failure must never occur to you, even after the game is through. Look at each stumble as a challenge to do better. You are an attractive person and the world is your oyster.

You might have heard of the term “assume attraction”. This notion of being attractive to the opposite sex will increase your confidence and prevent you from hating what you see in front of the mirror.

It doesn‟t matter if you don‟t look like the models from the magazines. That is society‟s view of what‟s attractive, and it‟s not necessarily what attracts women. Whether you have thought of yourself as someone who‟s fat, short, old, young, bald, or ugly ... do a mental overhaul and assume attraction. Your new identity starts inside your head. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise. Believe this truth and live the life of an attractive person who can impress people without really trying.

Principle #7. Follow The Blueprint to the Female Mind

Do not take what women tell you about their „ideal‟ guy literally. You see, this is what happens when a guy hears that a woman wants someone who is “smart, handsome and successful”: he thinks these traits belong to every other guy in the world except him. Most men 7|P a g e

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tend to feel down and insecure just because they think they don‟t fit a beautiful woman‟s notion of Ideal. There‟s no way that women only want tall, muscular guys with money. These things are just bonuses, and don‟t comprise the core of what makes women drop their panties for men. A high quality woman wants something more than the superficial, she wants to be emotionally enamored with a guy to really give her all to pleasing him.

An important thing to consider is what women “do not” want. First of all, they don‟t want to be thought of as perfect by a needy guy who thinks he can impress her by worshipping her. A girl knows she isn‟t the prettiest, but will blush and feel light headed when a guy gives her a sincere compliment. A compliment to a woman doesn‟t always mean something that‟s positive. You can tell a girl something negative, with just a HINT of positive, and still get the best response from her. This is the reason why saying something that‟s slightly negative is more effective than saying something that‟s completely positive. A negative comment will make your compliment stand out. Here‟s an example: compliment her personality and downgrade her beauty. Say something like, “you‟re hardly the prettiest girl in this room, but damn, you have the best personality.” By saying this, you touch on an extremely taboo topic (being a regular pretty girl in a sea of pretty girls), but you‟re combining this statement with something that will make her extremely glad she met you.

A girl wants to be appreciated in a way that transcends the physical. She wants to be appreciated for who she is… compliment her personality, her wit and her intellect, and you will score points for being a sensitive, confident guy who can make her heart flutter.

Principle #8. Quit Being a Girl’s Fan

Now, let‟s discuss the pedestal that most men build for attractive women. You see, a man will think that an attractive girl is unreachable, but that‟s hogwash. Women want to be treated gently, but they don‟t want to remain on a pedestal where it‟s lonely. A girl wants a man who is on her level, so that she‟s free to respond to him and submit to his wishes when he asserts his authority. A girl is hardly 8|P a g e

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fragile. She wants to be able to possess as well as be possessed by a guy. A girl feels special when you treat her like you would treat your buddies. Joke around with her and don‟t hesitate to set her straight if she acts like a prima donna. Make her see who‟s in control of things, and reward her with a naughty smile and a compliment when she acknowledges your authority. A girl is as human as you are. She has strengths and limitations. She also has her own insecurities to deal with. Mentally get on her level, or bring her to yours.

Principle #9. Beware Of Nicknames and Hoots

The cheesy douche bag that whistles and hoots whenever a cute girl passes by brings the same loser attitude with him when he‟s alone in conversation with a woman. This does not work. If you drool all over yourself when you‟re talking to a beautiful girl, she will think less of you. Things could not possibly get worse, unless of course you decide to call her by a nickname you thought up before she‟s completely comfortable with your company. A girl likes being called “babe” or “chick” if the man she‟s with has already established rapport.

Saying “hey baby” before you‟ve even began making a girl comfortable will only push her emotions farther away from you. Nothing will tell a girl what a lame guy you are than pulling off a stunt like this with a total stranger. Start somewhere safe, watch how she drops her guard as your conversation gets more and more playful, and THEN start cranking up the heat by giving her a nickname.

You can act like a horny dog only after you‟ve successfully seduced her. By that time, she won‟t have enough willpower to resist your advances, and she probably will like it if you act all horny around her. Don‟t be the creepy guy that slobbers whenever a pretty girl looks at him. Women don‟t appreciate getting eye raped by men who look like they can‟t even hold a decent conversation with a woman.

Don‟t be needy.

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You don‟t have to beg to get a woman's attention.

Women grow tired of men who try to bribe them with drinks and favors in exchange for sex, a phone number or validation. These same women are tired of dealing with schoolboy behavior in an adult world. A girl‟s dream is to talk to a really cool guy who can lead a conversation and make her feel more feminine.

Call a girl by her name while you‟re talking. Tell her a funny story or an anecdote of your travels. Ask her to share her own experience. Be firm enough to steer the direction of the conversation away from exboyfriends or her painful break ups. Not being able to control the topic of the conversation is also a sign of a lower class beta male.

Principle #10. Engage a Girl’s Emotions

Women are emotional creatures, although most of them might not agree.

Men can easily make women feel emotional, just by choosing his words and his conversation style. A girl will only say a guy bored her to tears if he was not able to make her feel emotional during their talk. Even if, logically, he seems like a nice catch, a girl must feel moved by a guy‟s story, or his behavior, to really think of him as the ideal guy for her.

Girls like to call some men “jerks” because these guys put them through an emotional rollercoaster during the conversation. The guy says something that sounds negative, waits for a reaction, and then dishes out something that is extremely touching. What happens is that a girl gets confused on whether she should hate or like the guy she‟s talking to. He makes her feel pissed off, excited, horny, attracted and intimidated all at once. An onlooker might think the jerk‟s going to get it because of the way the woman is reacting, but the truth is that women will keep coming back for that emotional ride of happiness and sadness because it was interesting. 10 | P a g e

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Principle #11. Exploit "Pre-Selection"

Here‟s another phenomenon that might not be so obvious to you if you haven‟t experienced it. Pre-Selection.

Have you noticed how some women seem to get more attracted to men who are “taken”? Think of the geek in high school who is always seen with the hottest women in town. Even if all he did with these women was discussing theories of trigonometry or calculus, he still spends lunch breaks with them. Moreover, women seek him out, preen for him and do him favors in front of everyone else. Even the most unattractive guys instantly get transformed and get other women lusting for them just because hot girls seem to find them interesting.

Getting preselected is the same as gaining the endorsement of the women you went out with. After a relationship or a successful chat with a beautiful girl, the other women in the vicinity will start thinking of you as a hot item. They will think “what did she see in him?” All it takes is the approval of a cute girl to get into the hotlist of most women in the club, in the campus, or anywhere else. With that said, it‟s safe to say that “you are who you dated”.

The best thing about this phenomenon of pre-selection is that it can be faked. In a crowded club, all you have to do is act cool, chat up a pretty girl, make her laugh and get her to introduce you to her friends. Better yet, show up laughing and having a great time with a group of quality men and women. In a social scene, women are subconsciously drawn to men that beautiful women have already talked to. Women in general are extremely competitive. They want what other women have, and they can‟t wait to try the newest trends that have been worn by their idols. This translates well for you if you use this knowledge right. Chat up a good looking girl and let the other girls in the vicinity see how you make her laugh and flirt with you.

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Make no mistake of it, you can increase your social value by successfully approaching the best looking girls in the club, even if you don‟t exactly land dates with them. For this reason, approaching at least one beautiful girl as soon as you enter a party should be a part of your game plan.

Principle #12. Exploit "Social Proof"

Social proof works like pre-selection, but on a massive scale. If you want to see the power of this social factor, just look at how celebrities get treated wherever they go. A star and his or her entourage need only to enter a venue to create a massive wave of attraction. Everyone wants to shake the celebrity‟s hand, and you‟re instantly pre-selected as a quality guy or girl if you belong to that star‟s entourage.

How can you harness the power of social proof? Get out of your shell and make your presence known inside the nightclub. You can return to the same place every weekend and meet up with the same people. Soon, the newcomers, or the ones that go to the club infrequently will see you having a blast with the regulars there and assume that you are a part of the “in” crowd. This phenomenon is also apparent in any other social gathering, for instance in your old high school. The quiet, shy guy in class has no social value but will immediately gain social recognition once the more popular kids acknowledge him as a part of the “in group”.

Be the guy who makes it a point to mingle with others anywhere, and the guy who can act cool, is passionate about his hobbies, has an interesting lifestyle, and with a lot of stories to tell. To get massive social proof, you have to take care of your grooming, wear clothes that fit, be at your most gregarious in a social scenario and choose your friends well.

Principle #13. "The R Factor" - Earn a Girl’s Respect

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Although the word „respect‟ differs in meaning according to culture and individual perspective, it‟s still best to keep your flirting along the boundaries of propriety. Don‟t touch a girl on a sensitive spot unless she asks for it through her words and actions. Earn a woman‟s respect by being an authority she can look up to and go to when she has a problem.

The best way to earn a girl‟s respect is by showing her that you‟re not a doormat. If she shows signs of being rude, tell her you‟re not playing her game and simply move out. Physically pushing an obnoxious girl and not stooping down to what she calls “assertiveness” by exchanging swear words with her will put you in a position of power. She will feel that you were affronted but that you don‟t want to retaliate by being rude to her because you have a lot of self-respect inside you. Why embarrass yourself in front of your friends and onlookers by indulging a girl‟s pettiness. Be curt about your objections and simply move away if the girl shows a tooaggressive vibe that you can‟t take. This behavior will make women chase after you. You become the prize that she must win, and women absolutely love working for their prize.

This also means you should be a bit picky about who you date. You can be friendly with everyone but when it comes to who you want to spend romantic time with, you call the shots. If this concept is too difficult to grasp, simply think of how some girls say, “Let‟s just be friends.” One simple statement instantly made you pine and long for the girl who said it. It‟s a part of human nature to want what one cannot have.

Here are some ways to screen the women you meet. Ask her loaded questions about herself and issue a qualifying statement. For instance, say “Are you adventurous? I only hang with girls who know how to have fun.” Say it with a smile and in a teasing manner to make the interaction lighter. However, she will realize the truth behind your words and will work for your affection. Leading, qualifying statements change the prize mindset inside a woman‟s mind. At first she might be thinking that you‟re so into her that you become needy for her affection. Put yourself in a position of power by making her work for your approval.

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What does it mean to get one‟s approval? Men throw this term around without really understanding what it means. This has a lot to do with your confidence in yourself. When you seek someone‟s approval, you put your fate in that person‟s hand. It means you don‟t feel handsome if she doesn‟t think so. You don‟t feel “worthy” of her attention. This is the wrong mindset, and generally a bad place to be when you‟re looking to attract a woman. Do not give that power of approval to her. Take it, own it. It‟s yours.

Principle #14. Be Candid

Some men can‟t tell women the truth. This is true in dating as well as anywhere else, and it has something to do with being chivalrous, wimpy or gentle. Here‟s the thing: women aren‟t made of glass. Just look around you and see how empowered women are. They can take what you tell them if it‟s stated in a constructive way. Your goal isn‟t to offend her, but to prevent her from getting mixed signals.

One mistake that a guy makes with women is giving her false hope so he won‟t offend her. Think of the guy who asks for a girl‟s phone number and promises to call but never does. He went for her number because she was throwing herself at him, but he wasn‟t really interested in her. What happens is that a girl feels totally hopeful that he will call and racks her brain thinking up an explanation when he doesn‟t. If you don‟t like a girl, don‟t keep her number. Moreover, do not make her hope you‟ll call her. Just tell her she isn‟t your type and move on.

One other thing to be straightforward about is your intention. Women love men who are totally upfront about their intentions. They will screen men and look for a potential boyfriend. Some women, however, are looking for potential husbands. If she seems like she belongs to the latter group, tell her directly that you‟re playing the field, enjoying your bachelor life and you‟re not looking to get hitched anytime in the future. Trust your gut instinct on this. If a woman has the “commitment” vibe going on and you‟re not ready to commit, do not mislead her into thinking you are. 14 | P a g e

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Mix in a bit of cocky attitude and play with her statements. Tease her for saying something completely illogical. If a woman asks for something that doesn‟t seem right, tell her a statement that will make her bristle. Remember to do it with a smile. One good example of this is when a woman tries to put you down or when she goes all cheap and tries to go for a free drink.

She might say something like ”you have to buy me a drink to prove that you like me”. To which you can reply, “Last week, a friend of mine bought a drink for a girl and she spread her legs for him….” and leave it at that. A statement like this will make a girl look at her statement and feel embarrassed. It will also make it clear to her that you felt embarrassed with her statement (and that you don‟t appreciate being used as a drink dispenser). It wasn‟t your goal to make her feel embarrassed, but rather to make her see the folly in her actions. Girls are too free with how they use the term “disrespect” without looking at how often they make men feel disrespected.

The key to a cocky attitude is to not fall all over a girl at the first indication of interest. Qualify her and think of why you would want to go with her. Remember, when you hook up with a girl and she becomes your girlfriend, you will be letting go of the opportunity to meet with other women. So, do yourself a favor and be hard to get. Flirt with a multitude of women but ask only for the numbers of the women you really want to date. Being cocky creates attraction simply because it tells a woman that you won‟t fall for a bag of girly tricks because you have a lot of things going for you. This makes a woman want you more. This behavior tells her that even if she is pretty, you are not at all impressed because you‟re looking for more.

Come to think of it, beauty is too common to get impressed over. Go for a girl who can jive with you, and who will put personality over physical looks and money anytime. Being cocky and hard to get means you have standards.

Principle #15. Calibrate

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In any situation, calibration is the key. If you do something that does not work, adapt and shift gears. Not all girls will get your jokes, and you will inevitably meet people you won‟t be able to jive with. When this happens, tailor your conversation according to the scenario.

You can modify your talking style according to what works in a particular place. Some nightclub tactics don‟t always work in other locations. You can get all cocky and girls love it when you‟re in clubs, but the same approach will not work in a quiet environment like a bookshop where girls are not seriously into flirting. The same is true in the grocery. Women in other locations act differently, and so you should modify your Game to fit with the situation and use the best tactics.

There are some constants that you won‟t need to change. These tactics work anywhere you are. Here are some of them:

Confidence - Do you know why some men look and act confident wherever they go? It‟s all in the mind. If you know you‟re someone who can approach girls at will, you won‟t have to work hard to get a woman‟s number or her name. The act of approaching women is a signal that you‟re confident. As soon as you take a step in her direction, a woman knows that you‟re a guy who‟s bold and daring. Guys who can‟t muster enough confidence to approach women end up not getting laid.

Good Openers - The first thing you talk to a woman about is your opener. But openers don‟t always have to be actual words. They can be actions you show a woman to get her attention. For instance, you can wave your hand or look at a woman directly. You can also make faces when the scenario demands it. Open a conversation with a girl with whatever you want, but don‟t forget the basics. Your opener must entice a woman to smile back, laugh with you or start a conversation with you.

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Finally, let‟s discuss your overall look. Do you slouch and twiddle your thumbs when you‟re around people? Do your actions tell women indirectly that you‟re a low class beta male? Body language sits at the core of being social, attracting women and making sure you look good whether you‟re into dating or into expanding your social circle. Stand like you own the place, chest out, stomach in and keep your eyes relaxed. Also, move slowly and avoid fidgeting. Walk like you‟re going somewhere, make eye contact and smile. A confident guy is aware of his social value, and this awareness is evident in his manner of talking, walking and sitting. Look and act like you‟re a leader and you will turn any woman into a follower. 

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