What Women Secretly Want

Hey,  welcome  back  to  Get  Laid  More  University.  I  am  your  headmaster,  professor,  and  overall   awesome  leader  of  getting  pussy,  Jon  Sinn.  Today  we’re  going  to  be  talking  about  what  women   secretly  want.   The  topic  of  female  psychology  is  one  that  is  near  and  dear  to  my  heart,  and  something  that  I   have  been  teaching  for  quite  a  while.  Not  that  I  in  any  way  know  everything  about  women,  but  I   definitely  know  more  than  you  do.  That  means  that  you  should  listen  to  everything  I  have  to   say.  But  you  already  knew  that.  That’s  why  you’re  a  member  of  Get  Laid  More  University.   I  want  to  talk  about  what  it  means  to  understand  female  psychology  and  understand  what   women  secretly  want,  but  are  not  willing  to  tell  you.     Understanding  women  mean  that  you’re  able  to  decode  what  women  mean  when  they  talk,   what  women’s  body  language  is  telling  you  about  the  interaction,  and  that  you’re  able  to   demonstrate  that  you  understand  the  world  of  an  attractive  girl.   I’m  going  to  be  citing  stuff  that  I  haven’t  really  talked  about  before  from  the  book  “Why   Women  Have  Sex”  and  I’m  also  going  to  be  sharing  common  female  thoughts,  as  well  as  giving   you  my  five  common  things  that  girls  say  and  what  they  actually  mean.   I’m  really  excited  to  be  getting  through  this  material,  as  I  think  it’s  some  of  the  more  interesting   stuff  that’s  out  there  and  some  of  the  things  that  really  can  cause  you  to  understand  women   better  and  get  better  results  with  all  women  that  you’re  talking  to  –  not  just  the  ones  that   you’re  interested  in  having  sex  with.  It’s  going  to  help  you  with  them,  but  it’s  going  to  help  you   with  your  mom,  your  sister,  that  bitch  at  work  that  you  hate.  Every  girl  that  you  interact  with   from  now  until  you  die  a  horrible  lonely  death  like  we  all  will.  I  don’t  know  why  I  think  that’s   funny,  but  I  do.   What  we’re  looking  at  is  what  they  mean  when  they  talk,  what  their  bodies  are  telling  you,  and   how  to  demonstrate  that  you  get  it.  You’ve  often  heard  dating  instructors  talk  about  guys  who   get  it  and  women  just  instantly  respond  to  them.  But  it’s  true  because  when  you  can  show  a  girl   that  you  understand  her  world,  then  you’re  showing  her  that  you’re  kind  of  an  insider  in  the   world  of  women  and  that’s  really  what  we  want  to  be.   We  want  to  be  someone  who  is  able  to  freely  flow  in  and  out  of  the  world  of  women  without   any  problems  or  distractions.  We  don’t  want  to  be  one  of  the  guys  that  women  refer  to  as   creeps,  as  weirdos,  as  people  who  basically  are  nerds  or  just  the  average  guy  who  doesn’t   understand  how  girls  work,  doesn’t  understand  how  they  thing,  doesn’t  understand  anything   about  them  other  than  that  they  smell  good  and  they’re  soft  –  which  is  a  good  enough  starting   off  point.  

Why  is  this  important?   It’s  important  because  girls  don’t  really  hook  up  with  guys  they  think  don’t  understand  them  –   or  at  least  basically  understand  women.  There’s  that  old  story  about  Freud  where  he,  at  the   time,  was  the  preeminent  psychologist  of  his  day  –  and  still  to  this  day  is  one  of  the  fathers  of   modern  psychology  even  though  he  was  also  a  coke  fiend  who  didn’t  get  REM  sleep  for  like  a   full  year  when  he  was  coming  up  with  his  theories.  But,  I  digress…   On  his  death  bed,  they  asked  if  there  was  anything  he  didn’t  understand  about  the  human   condition  and  he  said  he  didn’t  understand  what  women  want.  Honestly,  I  think  Freud  was   probably  not  giving  himself  enough  credit,  because  it  ain’t  that  hard  to  figure  out.  It’s  upsetting   and  kind  of  annoying,  but  it’s  not  really  that  difficult  to  figure  out.   It  comes  down  to  the  idea  of  logic  versus  emotion.  Men  are  very,  very,  very  logical.  We  are   people  who  want  to  know  the  specific  details.  We  want  to  know,  if  you’re  driving,  do  you  go   north,  or  east,  or  west,  or  south.  We  want  to  know  landmarks.  We  want  to  know  how  that   computer  works.  We  want  to  know  why  people  think  John  F.  Kennedy  was  assassinated.  We   want  to  know  things  that  are  logical,  precise,  detailed,  organized,  and  rational.   That  generally  tends  to  be  a  stereotype,  but  it  is  a  very  good  stereotype  –  and  a  stereotype  for  a   reason,  because  men  are  way,  way  more  logical  than  women.  Men  and  women  work  on  a   different  wavelength.  Men  want  to  know  the  logic,  the  specific,  the  technical.  Women  want  to   know  how  it  feels  and  women  want  to  feel  their  emotions.   There’s  a  great  quote  in  the  book  “The  Way  of  the  Superior  Man”  that  I’m  probably  going  to   mangle.  Basically,  he  talks  about  how  women  are  like  these  emotional  storms  and  they’re  going   to  be  blowing  all  over  the  place  in  different  directions.  There’s  no  logic  to  it.  It’s  kind  of  like  a   tornado,  hurricane,  monsoon,  or  one  of  those  big  fucking  storms  that  just  comes  in,  blows  all   over  the  place,  fucks  your  shit  up  and  there’s  no  rhyme  or  reason  to  it.  The  wind  blows  both   ways,  the  water  gets  sucked  up.  Sometimes  there’s  water,  sometimes  there’s  not.  Sometimes   there’s  dust,  sometimes  there’s  not.  It’s  all  over  and  women  are  emotionally  reacting  100%.   Men  –  we’re  kind  of  like  a  rock  in  this  storm.  Or  in  the  idealized  version  of  ourselves,  we  are  a   rock  in  this  storm  and  we  kind  of  understand  what  is  going  on,  but  we  don’t  have  that  same   level  of  emotion.     So  when  it  comes  to  women,  what  gets  you  the  girl  is  the  way  you  make  her  feel.     As  men,  in  addition  to  being  really  logical  and  wanting  things  to  make  sure  and  be  consistent   and  rational  –  which  I  think  is  a  good  thing  sometimes,  but  it’s  kind  of  boring  sometimes  too   (there  are  definitely  reasons  that’s  not  always  good)  –  we’re  also  much  more  verbally  and  

physically  direct.  We  touch,  we  grope,  we  grab,  we  awkwardly  state  interest  and  we  hit  on  girls,   and  that’s  basically  how  we  communicate.     Men  are  kind  of  like  a  train  that  goes  in  a  straight  line.  We  want  to  just  get  from  point  A  to  point   B  in  the  easiest  most  hassle-­‐free,  most  logical  kind  of  manner  that  we  can  –  and  as  quickly  as   we  can.   Women,  on  the  other  hand,  come  equipped  with  a  more  sophisticated  way  of  communicating.   A  lot  of  this  comes  from  the  idea  of  social  programming.  A  quick  disclaimer  on  social   programming,  because  I  really  think  that  a  lot  of  dating  coaches  –  and  I’m  not  going  to  name   names  –    who  harp  on  social  programming  as  it’s  the  worst  possible  thing  in  the  world  and  it’s   designed  to  keep  you  down  and  make  you  unhappy.  There  are  even  men’s  groups  now  that  are   like,  “You’ve  been  socially  programmed  to  raise  children  that  aren’t  yours”  and  they  go  to  these   extremes  that  are  really  not  only  unhealthy,  but  kind  of  crazy.  Not  fun  crazy  like  I  think  I  am,  but   legitimately  disturbed,  like  Timothy  McVeigh  unibomber  crazy.     That’s  not  okay  either.  So  I  don’t  want  to  say  that  social  programming  is  entirely  bad,  because   we  do  need  social  programming  to  have  a  society,  to  live  in  a  society  where  we  don’t  get   murdered  or  raped  or  robbed  or  have  fucking  terrorism.  We  need  some  social  programming.   Part  of  that  is  the  social  programming  that  has  brainwashed  women.  From  early  on,  their   parents  teach  them  to  say  no.  Not  to  mention  the  dozens  of  organizations  and  various  other   bodies,  such  as  the  Christian  and  Catholic  churches,  the  harems  in  ancient  Egypt,  on  and  on  to   the  Middle  East  situations.  Basically,  all  of  these  groups  and  people  have  stepped  up  and  told   women  not  to  have  sex.     They  told  girls  to  wait  and  it’s  best  to  be  monogamous  and  that  sex  is  supposed  to  be  special   and  shared.  Sex  should  be  amazing  and  this,  that,  and  the  other  and  it  goes  on  and  on  until  at   an  early  age  women  start  to  think  that  sex  is  taboo  and  that’s  where  a  lot  of  the  programming   comes  from.  It  comes  because  of  the  societal  rules  laid  down  by  men.   So  dudes  who  are  super  upset  at  the  social  programming,  be  mad  at  those  dudes.  Don’t  be  mad   at  women.  A  lot  of  guys  are  like,  “Oh,  women  are  bitches.”  Dudes  cause  that.  We  socially   programmed  women  as  we  were  building  society  to  protect  our  investment.   If  you  want  to  look  back  at  why  a  lot  of  this  stuff  happened,  it  comes  down  to  raising  kids,  as   most  of  this  stuff  does,  once  you  get  to  a  really  deep  level.  Back  in  the  day,  as  a  woman,  you   have  much  more  at  risk  having  sex  than  a  man  does.  You  still  do.  It’s  a  little  more  mitigated  now   because  of  condoms  and  abortions  and  Plan  B  and  the  other  abortion  pill  that  you  can  take  if   you’re  still  six  weeks  in.  There  are  a  lot  of  options  so  you’re  not  going  to  have  a  kid  if  you  don’t   want  to.  

But  back  in  the  day,  40,000  or  50,000  years  ago  –  even  1,000  years  ago.  I  always  go  way  back   when  I’m  talking  about  this  kind  of  stuff  as  if  500  years  ago  it  was  any  different.  Until  recent   modern  medical  breakthroughs,  if  a  woman  got  pregnant,  she  was  really  kind  of  in  the  lurch  if   the  dude  just  took  off.  As  a  guy,  I  can  get  a  girl  pregnant  and  run  away  to  Mexico  and  that  girl  is   going  to  be  stuck.  She  can’t  run  away  from  the  pregnancy.   She’s  got  to  carry  that  kid,  she’s  got  to  have  someone  to  protect  her  to  help  her  eat  because   pregnancy  is  very  draining  in  terms  of  energy.  It’s  very  draining  in  terms  of  you  can’t  really   work,  so  you  need  access  to  resources.   Basically,  to  have  a  kid,  women  need  a  man  to  kind  of  be  invested  in  them.  That’s  one  part  of   the  programming.  Women  want  to  get  you  invested  before  they  have  sex  with  you  because   they  want  to  make  sure  that  you  don’t  just  impregnate  them  and  bounce.   The  second  part  of  this  is  actually  from  the  man’s  perspective.  You  will  probably  be  psyched  to   hear  this,  because  it’s  the  flip  direction  of  men  getting  screwed  over  by  women.   The  other  part  of  this  is  the  idea  of  cuckolding.  Cuckolding  is  what  happens  when  a  man   impregnates  a  woman  and  then  she  tricks  another  man  into  raising  that  kid  and  giving  it   resources  and  loving  it  and  taking  care  of  it  –  and  her.  That’s  a  real  shitty  situation,  too.  As  you   can  see  by  the  reactions  on  the  Montell  Jordan  Show  or  the  Maury  Povich  show  when  they  find   out  the  guy  is  not  the  father  and  the  guys  act  like  they  just  won  the  Super  Bowl.   There’s  equal  sides  investment  in  sex  to  not  lose  your  investment.  Both  sides  want  to  not  lose   their  investment.     Having  said  that,  that’s  kind  of  the  biological  reason.  Now  I  want  to  talk  about  why  women  have   sex.  I’m  actually  going  into  my  outline  of  the  “Why  Women  Have  Sex”  book,  which  I  never   released  publically.  I  just  kept  it  for  myself,  just  because  I  didn’t  really  know  how  to  present  it.  It   wasn’t  product  material.  I  didn’t  really  want  to  put  it  on  the  blog  either,  because  I  would  have   to  do  more  extrapolating.     I  want  to  talk  a  little  about  why  women  have  sex.  The  book  “Why  Women  Have  Sex”  is  an   interesting  book.  I’m  not  sure  I  necessarily  can  recommend  it  unless  you’re  really  interested  in   this  kind  of  stuff,  because  it  is  kind  of  scientific.  It’s  kind  of  dry,  but  there  are  some  interesting   things  that  came  out  of  it  that  I  want  to  discuss.     The  first  one  is  a  list  of  ten  major  reasons  that  women  have  sex.  They’re  basically  ranked  from   most  common  to  least  common.  We’re  going  to  be  talking  about  those  kind  of  quickly,  and  then   we’re  going  to  talk  about  some  of  the  other  things  that  I  thought  were  interesting  in  this  book   about  female  psychology  and  female  sexual  selection.  

I’ll  give  you  my  thoughts  on  each  of  the  ten  reasons  women  have  sex  as  I  go  through  it.   1. Love   Love  is  the  number  one  reason  that  women  have  sex.  Not  anything  else.  This  is  exhaustive   research.  Not  through  questionnaires,  but  through  intense  interviewing  and  other  scientific   methods  outside  of  just  asking,  which  you  can’t  really  necessarily  control.    So  the  number  one  reason  women  have  sex  is  because  they’re  in  love  with  a  guy,  because  they   feel  that  incredible  sensation  of  what  they  call  the  triangle  theory  of  love,  which  is  intimacy,   passion,  and  commitment  that  form  romantic  love.  That’s  the  first  reason.  They  feel  intimacy   with  that  person.  They  feel  they  understand  that  person.  That  person  knows  them.  They  know   you  and  they  feel  that  it’s  an  intimate  shared  one-­‐on-­‐one  relationship.   The  second  is  passion.  Passion  is  incredibly  powerful.  They  feel  that  they  are  passionate  about   the  other  person.  They  want  to  be  around  them.  They  want  to  know  everything  about  them.   They  want  more  of  that  person  than  anyone  else.     Commitment  means  that  there’s  a  long-­‐term  future.  There’s  something  big  and  correct  and   rooted  and  solid  in  the  relationship  as  opposed  to  a  non-­‐committed,  loose,  flaky  relationship.     That’s  the  number  one  reason  women  have  sex.  I  don’t  think  that’s  being  brought  up  because   Helen  Fisher  is  a  woman  who  wrote  the  book.  I  really  do  believe  that  most  women  do  have  sex   based  on  love.  We’re  not  just  talking  about  pickups.  This  is  not  just  a  pickup.  In  a  pickup,  is  the   sex  love?  No,  of  course  not.  It’s  going  to  be  one  of  these  nine  other  things.   But  when  women  are  having  sex  in  relationships,  in  marriages,  the  majority  of  sex  being  had  is   going  to  be  because  of  love,  because  of  those  three  feelings:  intimacy,  passion,  and   commitment.   Number  two  and  number  three  are  kind  of  interesting.     2. Jealousy   That’s  right  –  jealousy.  Why  do  women  have  sex  because  of  jealousy?  When  we  get  to  point   number  three,  I’ll  talk  about  jealousy  in  a  pickup.  When  I  was  talking  about  social  programming   and  how  we’ve  evolved  psychologically  and  behaviorally,  I  talked  about  cuckolding  and   investment  and  how  women  want  to  keep  you  around  because  of  the  kid  and  how  you  want  to   make  sure  the  kid  is  you’re  and  that  you’re  not  getting  chumped  out.   Jealousy  fits  really  nicely  into  that  because  jealousy  is  the  evolved  response  that  gives  us  the   emotion  to  be  concerned  with  that.  If  we  didn’t  care  at  all  about  getting  cuckolded  or  losing  the   man,  then  we  wouldn’t  have  jealousy.  We’d  be  like,  “Eh,  whatever,  who  cares?”    

But  that  emotion  specifically  evolved  and  arose  because  we  needed  to  protect  our  investment   and  because  the  people  who  protected  their  investment  survived  and  passed  on  their  genes.   Jealously  actually  was  a  survival  benefit.  The  people  who  were  jealous  were  more  likely  to   survive,  pass  on  their  genes,  and  have  children  than  the  guys  who  weren’t.  Guys  and  girls.   What  happens  a  lot  of  the  time  is  these  jealously  things  will  evolve  and  girls  will  have  sex  to   keep  their  men  from  cheating,  or  guys  will  have  sex  because  they  want  to  show  the  girl  that   they’re  still  theirs.  They’re  jealous  of  the  other  attention  she’s  getting  from  men,  whether  it’s   her  boss  or  another  dude.  It  can  even  be  attention  from  women.  Guys  can  get  jealous  if  their   girl  is  getting  too  much  attention  from  another  girl  –  a  best  friend  or  something  like  that  –  and   they’ll  want  to  have  sex.     Women,  same  thing.  They’ll  get  jealous  of  the  guy  spending  more  time  with  his  friends,  jealous   that  there  are  girls  who  are  sexy  that  are  around.  Trying  to  protect  her  investment,  she’ll  give   more  sex  because  she  assumes  that’s  going  to  make  the  guy  more  likely  to  stay.   So  that’s  jealousy.  That’s  reason  number  two.   3. Competition   This  one  is  the  real  mind  fuck.  If  you’ve  listened  to  my  stuff  before,  you  heard  me  talk  about   feeding  frenzies  and  making  girls  jealous  so  they  compete  over  you  as  a  tactic.  This  really  backs   up  all  the  things  I’ve  been  saying  of  years  and  all  the  claims  I’ve  been  making  about  getting   three  or  four  girls  to  argue  over  me  and  end  up  getting  laid  by  multiple  of  them,  because   competition  –  winning  –  is  a  real  concern  for  women,  especially  with  other  women.   I  always  say  nobody  hates  women  more  than  other  women.  Women  are  the  most  misogynistic   people  in  the  world.  Nobody  hates  girls  more  than  a  girl.  For  women,  they’re  competition  is  so   much  less  over  than  men  that  oftentimes  it  comes  in  the  form  of  this  kind  of  sexual  competition   where  they’re  beating  a  girl  by  getting  a  guy.  There’s  competition  over  guys,  even  if  they’re  not   the  coolest  guys.   If  you  ever  watch  True  Life  “I’m  in  an  open  relationship”  or  “I’m  dating  two  people”  or  any  of   these  white  trash  shows  like  Teen  Mom,  you’ll  see  that  oftentimes  these  dudes  are  losers,  but   because  there’s  another  girl  involved,  the  girls  will  throw  themselves  at  these  guys  who  aren’t   even  cool  just  strictly  to  win.  It’s  not  even  about  the  guy,  which  is  not  super  flattering  for  us.  It’s   not  even  about  you  as  much  as  it  is  about  beating  the  other  girl  and  winning.  That’s  really  what   is  going  on  when  it  comes  to  the  competition,  which  is  the  third  most  common.   Jealousy  and  competition  are  two  of  the  top  three.  Love,  okay,  great.  It  sounds  nice.  Jealousy   and  competition  are  two  and  three.  As  we  go  through,  you’ll  see  that’s  pretty  huge.  If  you’ve  

ever  questioned  the  stuff  I  said  about  making  women  jealous,  here’s  some  scientific  backup  for   your  ass.   4. Thrill  of  conquest   This  is  something  or  men,  too.  I  would  say  for  men  this  is  probably  number  one  or  number  two:   the  thrill  of  the  conquest.  Winning.  Being  able  to  do  something  you  didn’t  think  you  were  going   to  be  able  to  do,  being  able  to  hook  up  with  a  guy  you  didn’t  think  you  were  going  to  be  able  to   get.  The  thrill  of  winning  something  –  of  winning  a  guy  over,  of  being  able  to  make  him  yours,  of   being  able  to  feel  powerful  and  alive  and  like  you’ve  got  something  happening.   5. A  sense  of  duty   Again,  a  little  bit  more  of  a  relationship  type  thing.  Generally,  in  a  relationship,  you  feel  like  you   should  have  sex.  Or  if  a  guy  has  taken  her  out  three  or  four  times  and  she  feels  like  she  owes   him.  There’s  something  she  has  to  do.  To  continue  to  date,  she’s  going  to  have  to  put  out.  It’s   just  a  sense  of  duty.   6. A  sense  of  adventure   Doing  something  that’s  outside  of  herself,  doing  something  that’s  a  little  risky,  doing  something   that  allows  you  to  get  your  pulse  moving.  It’s  fun.  It’s  an  adventure.  It’s  maybe  a  little  scary,  but   it  gets  her  pulse  moving.  It’s  a  story.   Another  reason  I  think  girls  do  this  is  for  the  story  value.  I’ve  often  said  girls  are  much  more   likely,  in  my  humble  experience,  to  have  lists  of  guys  they  want  to  have  sex  with.  I  call  them  the   to-­‐do  list.  Girls  are  most  likely  to  basically  have  a  to-­‐do  list  of  dudes  that  they  would  be  pretty   comfortable  doing.  Maybe  they  want  to  do  a  guy  who’s  over  6’5”  or  a  guy  who  has  a  cool  scar   or  a  guy  who  rides  a  motorcycle.     I  find  that  is  much  more  common  than  men  who  want  to  bang  girls  with  weird  different  things.   There  are  very  few  guys  who  want  to  sleep  with  a  girl  who’s  6’6”,  but  there  are  a  lot  of  girls   who  want  to  sleep  with  a  guy  who’s  6’6”  for  the  sense  of  adventure,  for  the  story,  for  the  non-­‐ sexual  benefits.  It’s  really  more  about  her  and  her  girls  than  about  you.   7. Barter  and  trade   This  is  where  gold  digging  comes  in.  This  is  where  hooking  comes  in.  This  is  where  popping   bottle  service  comes  in.  They’re  getting  something  and  using  sex  as  a  fungible  asset.  Fungible   means  it  can  be  traded  for  many  things  and  that  the  value  differentiates  based  on  what  the   person  values  it  at.  It’s  not  a  set-­‐priced  good.  It’s  a  fungible  good  that  can  be  traded  for  a   variety  of  goods,  services,  etc.    

What  is  she  getting  from  it?  Maybe  she’s  getting  to  go  to  the  Grammys.  Maybe  she’s  getting  to   go  to  $300  dinners  at  the  SLS  Hotel.  Maybe  she’s  getting  to  ride  in  a  limo,  fly  on  a  private  jet,   take  vacations,  not  have  to  work,  get  a  bunch  of  Louboutins,  whatever.  Maybe  she’s  doing  it  to   get  a  job.  Maybe  she’s  doing  it  to  move  up  the  corporate  ladder.  But  she’s  doing  it  for  some   reason  other  than  actually  wanting  sex  in  and  of  itself.   8. The  ego  boost   It  makes  her  feel  good  about  herself.  Maybe  because  she  felt  like  the  guy  was  out  of  her  league.     Maybe  because  he  just  made  her  feel  very  pretty.  For  some  reason,  the  girl  was  doing  it  to   make  herself  feel  better,  doing  it  to  validate  herself.  Having  sex  for  validation  –  to  make   yourself  feel  cooler,  better,  smarter,  sexier,  more  attractive,  etc.     9. The  dark  side   This  is  basically  known  as  sexual  conflict  theory.  When  the  evolutionary  interests  of  men  and   women  differ,  there  is  potential  for  a  conflict  which  lends  each  sex  to  adapt.  Men  lie;  women   develop  ways  to  determine  what  is  real  and  fake.     Basically,  what’s  happening  there  is  women  get  tricked  or  lied  to.  That’s  the  ninth  reason  they   have  sex:  because  they’re  duped  into  it.  That’s  a  real  thing.  Rape  obviously  falls  into  the  dark   side,  as  does  some  of  the  other  nastier  things  that  we  want  to  avoid.  That’s  what’s  going  on.     10. Sexual  medicine   Sexual  medicine  basically  is  using  sex  to  make  yourself  feel  better  physically.  The  ego  boost  is  all   about  using  sex  to  make  yourself  feel  better  emotionally.  Sexual  medicine  is  all  about  using  sex   to  make  yourself  feel  better  physically.     Some  interesting  thing  about  sexual  medicine:  sexual  arousal  is  150%  stronger  after  exercise.  If   you’re  looking  to  get  laid,  maybe  take  a  girl  to  the  gym  instead  of  the  bar.  Women’s  ideal  for   sex  is  19  minutes  of  foreplay  and  14  minutes  of  sex  for  a  grand  total  of  33  minutes.  So  if  you’re   having  sex  in  less  than  33  minutes,  you’re  not  doing  ideally  what  they  want.     20-­‐  to  30-­‐year  old  women  have  sex  an  average  of  7.5  times  a  month.  The  average  American   woman  has  sex  about  6.3  times  a  month.     Those  are  the  ten  reasons  why  women  have  sex.  I  just  want  to  talk  about  a  couple  other  things   that  I  thought  were  interesting.  In  the  beginning  of  this  book,  if  you’ve  ever  read  any  Mystery   Method  or  Love  System  stuff,  they  have  the  idea  of  survival  and  replication  theory.   In  the  beginning  of  this  book,  she  really  blows  survival  and  replication  out  of  the  water  as  she   reveals  that  women’s  sexual  choices  are  very  flexible  mechanisms,  meaning  that  every  woman  

basically  has  sex  for  different  reasons.  They  don’t  tend  to  move  outside  these  ten  reasons,  but   every  girl  is  going  to  have  a  different  makeup  psychologically  of  why  she’s  going  to  have  sex   based  on  those  ten  reasons.   They  talked  a  little  about  sexy  sons  and  daughters  theory,  which  is  the  theory  that  women  are   motivated  not  just  to  reproduce,  but  to  reproduce  in  a  way  to  create  the  sexiest  sons  and   daughters,  and  thus  the  best  chance  of  continued  replication.   But  there’s  also  something  called  mate  copying,  which  is  where  women  look  for  mates  that   match  up  with  women  they  are  similar  to  or  would  like  to  be.  This  is  a  form  of  social  proof.   Women  are  looking  for  mates  that  match  up  with  women  that  they  think  are  like  them  or   better  than  them.  They’re  looking  for  men  who  fit  in  with  basically  who  they  want  to  be.   Love  maps  are  formed  early  on  as  women  make  associations  and  form  stereotypes  of  what  they   believe  to  be  sexy.  When  it  comes  to  the  thrill  of  the  conquest,  revenge  is  a  major  motivating   factor.  One  of  the  biggest  things  that  women  do  when  they’re  doing  the  thrill  of  the  conquest  is   ex-­‐boyfriends  of  friends  of  theirs.  They  call  this  mate  poaching  or  revenge  for  mate  poaching.  If   a  girl  slept  with  her  boyfriend,  she  sleeps  with  her  boyfriend,  and  that’s  kind  of  how  it  goes.   They  talked  about  how  insecurity  in  relationships  increases  jealousy.  They  talked  also  about   how  women  tend  to  provoke  jealousy  when  they  feel  more  committed  than  their  partner.  So  if   a  girl  is  doing  something  that  makes  you  kind  of  jealous,  you  have  to  look  at  whether  or  not  she   thinks  that  you  are  less  committed  than  she  is,  because  generally  women  tend  to  provoke   jealousy  when  they  feel  like  they  are  committed  more  than  their  partner.   79%  of  women  develop  emotions  while  cheating.  It’s  very  difficult  for  women  to  separate   emotions  from  sex,  while  only  33%  of  men  develop  feelings  while  cheating.  The  actual  act  of   cheating  for  women  is  much  more  emotional  than  it  is  physical,  as  is  all  of  these  things.     If  you  look  at  the  ten  reasons,  sexual  medicine  is  the  only  physical  one.  Nothing  else  is  really   about  arousal  or  uncontrollable  sexual  lust.  It’s  all  basically  about  things  that  are  emotional.   Genital  arousal  does  not  trigger  women  as  it  does  men.  And  because  women  are  nurturers,   they  may  use  sex  to  make  someone  else  feel  better,  kind  of  in  the  sense  of  duty  idea.   A  sense  of  adventure.  For  women,  more  economic  freedom  equals  more  sexual  freedom.  The   woman  who  makes  $100,000  is  more  likely  to  sleep  around  than  the  woman  who  makes  $10  an   hour.     Women’s  total  orgasm  frequency  is  highest  at  30.  Women  are  most  orgasmic  when  they’re  30   years  old,  peaking  up  until  32  and  then  it  starts  to  drop  off  again  as  they  head  into  menopause.   Actually  for  fertility,  after  32  it’s  pretty  hard  for  women  to  get  pregnant.    

Extraverted  and  impulsive  women  seek  sexual  variety.  That’s  pretty  obvious.   Narcissism  is  the  highest  cause  of  sexual  infidelity.  That  makes  a  lot  of  sense  because  someone   who  is  narcissistic  is  obsessed  with  themselves.  I  should  do  one  of  these  on  narcissism,  because   narcissism  I  think  is  one  of  the  biggest  reasons  that  men  and  women  have  problems  because   oftentimes  women  are  narcissistic,  especially  in  their  early  20s,  and  they’re  obsessed  with   everything  about  themselves  and  that  leads  to  infidelity  because    when  you  only  think  about   yourself,  you’re  not  thinking  about  what  it  does  to  your  partner.   Ironically,  the  second  highest  cause  of  sexual  infidelity  is  perfectionism.  It’s  pretty  close  in   second  place.  People  who  want  everything  to  be  perfect.  People  who  want  to  have  their  cake   and  eat  it  too,  as  I  always  like  to  say.  Usually  I  complain  about  guys  doing  this,  but  women  will   do  this  too.  Women  will  have  a  guy  who  they  think  is  sexy  and  a  guy  that  they  love  and  they’ll   try  to  keep  them  both  going  because  they  want  to  have  it  all  and  have  their  life  be  100%   perfect,  but  nothing  is  100%  perfect.   Financial  protection  equals  physical  protection.  The  more  money  a  girl  makes,  the  more  she  can   protect  herself  from  rape.  Men  possess  the  sexual  over-­‐perception  bias,  which  is  a  tendency  to   over-­‐infer  sexual  interest  based  on  ambiguous  info.  That’s  why  a  lot  of  times  guys  feel  like  girls   want  to  fuck  them  when  it’s  not  true,  just  basically  because  men  tend  to  assume  that  women   are  always  into  us.   Sexual  opportunities  tend  to  cost  men  time  and/or  material  goods.  There’s  no  such  thing  as   free  sex.  That’s  really,  really  true.  You’re  going  to  pay  for  it  one  way  or  another.  Even  getting   good  at  pickup,  it’s  going  to  take  time.  It’s  going  to  take  time  to  go  out  and  practice  and  refine   your  game  and  listen  to  my  materials  and  practice  and  get  on  the  phone  and  take  women  on   dates,  etc.  It  also  is  going  to  take  money  because  you’ve  got  to  pay  money  for  my  materials,   you’ve  got  to  pay  money  to  go  out  to  bars  and  clubs,  you’ve  got  to  pay  money  to  go  on  dates.   You’ve  got  to  pay  money  to  be  in  relationships.  Girlfriends  cost  money,  as  do  one  night  stands.     Sexual  economics  basically  play  out  as  women  accrue  power  based  on  male  sexual  psychology.   The  reason  that  male  sexual  psychology  is  so  bad  is  that  we  have  a  variety  of  problems  that   men  have  psychologically  that  lead  to  women  having  all  the  power.   The  first  one  is  desire  for  variety,  also  known  as  the  Coolidge  effect  from  this  famous  story   where  the  Coolidges,  when  they  were  President  and  First  Lady,  went  to  some  farm  (maybe  it   was  the  White  House  farm,  maybe  it  was  New  York,  I  don’t  know)  and  they  were  talking  about   how  the  rooster  will  have  sex  25  times  a  day.  Mrs.  Coolidge  said,  “Please  tell  the  President   that.”   When  the  President  was  told  that,  he  said,  “With  the  same  hand  every  time?”  

And  they  said,  “No,  of  course  not.”   And  he  said,  “Please  tell  Mrs.  Coolidge  that.”   So  the  male  desire  for  sexual  variety  has  now  been  called  the  Coolidge  effect  because  of  that   anecdote.   The  male  sex  drive  is  almost  a  curse,  man.  I  have  written  extensively  on  my  blog  about  how  I   feel  that  the  male  sex  drive  is  kind  of  a  trapping  thing.  We’ve  got  biological  chemical  reactions   going  on  inside  of  our  bodies  as  men  that  will  make  us  want  sex  all  the  time.  Dudes  are  almost   always  ready  to  go.  For  us,  sex  is  basically  consent  away  at  all  times  with  women  we’re   attracted  to,  which  is  most  women.     Despite  guys  who  say  they  only  date  tens  or  say  they  want  tens,  we’re  not  as  picky  as  we’d  like   to  make  people  believe.  If  a  girl  is  willing  and  she’s  not  obese,  disgusting,  disfigured,  we’re   pretty    much  down.     The  sexual  over-­‐perception  bias,  which  I  talked  about  a  minute  ago,  we  assume  that  women  are   more  down  than  they  are.  We  assume  that  if  a  girl  is  nice  to  us,  she  wants  to  have  sex  with  us.   That’s  not  necessarily  true.   Women  may  have  sex  to  raise  their  social  status  with  their  friends  through  competition,  social   status,  with  a  conquest,  looks,  or  value  extracted.  So  if  them  and  their  friends  both  want  to   bang  some  dude,  the  girl  who  wins  raises  her  social  status,  if  the  guy  is  particularly  high  value  –   if  he’s  famous,  rich,  good  looking,  really  cool,  whatever  the  social  status  is.  If  he’s  a  high  status   guy,  that’s  going  to  raise  their  status.   Or  value  extracted  –  what  she  gets  out  of  him.  If  he  buys  her  Louboutins,  if  he  buys  her  a  Louis   Vuitton  bag  –  why  is  Louie  so  cool?  I  don’t  know.  Louie  just  sounds  classy.  Maybe  that’s  why   Louis  is  in  all  these  over-­‐priced  brands.  But  basically,  that’s  how  the  ego  boost  works.   Another  interesting  thing  is  married  women’s  most  common  sexual  fantasies.  The  two  most   common  sexual  fantasies  that  married  women  have  are,  number  one,  an  imaginary  romantic   lover  –  this  idealized  kind  of  man  who  sucks  her  up  and  gives  her  an  assignation,  makes  her  feel   like  she’s  never  felt  before,  makes  her  feel  that  his  passion  for  her  conquers  all,  etc.     Number  two  is  the  flipside  that  makes  human  beings  –  and  women  in  particular  –  very   interesting.  Being  overpowered  and  forced  to  surrender.  Yes,  basically  rape  is  the  second  most   common  married  woman  fantasy.     If  you’ve  ever  read  My  Secret  Garden  or  Sperm  Wars,  you’ll  see  that  rape  fantasies  and  being   overpowered  and  taken  by  a  man  are  extremely,  extremely  common  female  fantasies.  On  the  

one  hand,  women  want  to  be  sensual  and  sweet  and  take  their  time  and  be  romanced,  and  on   the  other  hand,  they  want  someone  to  come  and  force  them  and  take  away  their  responsibility   and  make  them  do  whatever  they  want  so  they  can  serve  and  be  used  sexually,  but  get  off  on   that.   That’s  all  the  interesting  information  from  why  women  have  sex.  The  big  things  to  keep  in  mind   are  those  ten  reasons,  as  well  as  the  other  add-­‐on  information  I  talked  about.     How  women  get  aroused   I  want  to  talk  a  little  about  how  women  get  aroused.  Women  get  attracted  in  a  different  way.   Men  are  more  visually  aroused.  We  see  a  nice  ass  or  big  boobs  and  that’s  all  it  takes,  whereas   women  get  aroused  more  sensually.  When  you  think  sensual,  you  want  to  think  senses  –   hearing,  seeing,  tasting,  smelling,  and  touching  –  blending  into  an  overall  process.     One  thing  I  want  to  talk  about  briefly  is  how  to  demonstrate  you  understand  her  world.  It’s  key   to  show  girls  that  you  understand  what  it’s  like  to  be  a  woman.  This  is  where  you  could  talk   about  the  unfair  double  standards  between  women  and  men,  and  about  close  female   relationships  you  have.     The  [40:27  inaudible]  double  standard  is  a  great  topic  of  conversation  for  showing  that  you   understand  her  world.  Oftentimes  when  talking  to  a  girl,  I’ll  say,  “You  know,  growing  up  with   sister  or  having  a  lot  of  female  friends…”  –  both  of  which  are  true  for  me  –  it  may  not  be  true   with  you,  but  not  the  worst  lie  in  the  world  to  tell.  Not  the  sisters  one,  because  if  you  don’t   have  sisters,  that  will  come  back  and  bite  you,  but  the  having  female  friends.  You  can  talk  about   how  you  understood  women  a  little  differently,  how  you  understand  that,  for  women,  it’s   difficult  to  be  a  woman  because  you  have  this  kind  of  double-­‐edged  sword  where  you  want  to   be  sexual,  you  want  to  be  kind  of  out  there,  but  you  get  judged  for  it  and  that’s  not  fair.   One  thing  I  always  tell  girls  if  I  said  I  wanted  to  sleep  with  you,  people  would  laugh  it  off  and  go,   “Yeah,  no  shit.”  But  if  she  said  she  wanted  to  sleep  with  me,  then  people  would  judge  her  and   think  about  her  as  a  slut  or  XYZ.  That’s  not  really  fair.  So  showing  you  understand  that  dynamic   is  very,  very  important  to  making  things  work.   The  other  thing  I  want  to  talk  about  is  taking  responsibility  for  the  escalation.  Women  are   designed  by  nature  to  be  sexually  receptive,  while  men  are  sexually  aggressive.  If  you  look  at   the  vagina  and  the  penis,  it’s  pretty  obvious  what’s  the  receptor  and  what’s  the  fucking   aggressor.  So  we  must  always  take  responsibility  for  escalating  the  interaction.  We  can’t  expect   it  to  just  happen,  because  even  though  women  want  to  conquest,  their  way  of  conquesting  is   going  to  be  less  overt  and  direct  than  a  man.    

For  girls  to  have  sex,  it  has  to  just  happen.  They  have  to  have  plausible  deniability.  They  have  to   have  something  so  it  doesn’t  seem  like  they  were  seeking  sex,  because  even  though  women   seek  sex,  there  are  ten  reasons  that  we  have  talked  about  at  great  length.  They  don’t  want  the   social  stigma  of  being  a  girl  who  seek  sex  because  society  has  devalued  that  for  whatever   reason  –  social  programming  hierarchies,  the  world  working.   If  women  were  able  to  just  fuck  whoever  they  want  anytime  they  were  attracted  to  someone,   nothing  would  ever  work  because  everyone  would  be  fucking  24/7.  In  a  way,  for  the  good  of   our  species  and  the  development  of  technology,  etc.,  it’s  good  that  women  are  a  little  more   particular.  But  we  still  need  to  be  able  to  make  it  just  happen.  That’s  why  you  can’t  just  tell  a   girl  to  come  back  to  your  house  and  fuck  you.  You  have  to  say,  “Let’s  go  watch  a  movie,”  or   have  a  glass  of  wine  or  XYZ,  because  we  need  to  give  the  girl  plausible  deniability  so  when  she   tells  her  friends,  she  can  say  it  just  happened  as  opposed  to  “Well,  I  was  really  horny,  so  I  went   over  to  his  house  and  fucked  him.”   Body  language     Let’s  talk  a  little  bit  about  body  language.  Here  are  some  signs  to  look  for.  It’s  bad  if  the  girl   looks  around  while  talking  to  you,  if  she  crosses  her  arms,  she  winces  or  gives  any  sort  of  facial   flinch.  If  you  want  to  understand  more  about  facial  expressions  and  micro  expressions,  I  highly   recommend  Paul  Ekman’s  book  Unmasking  the  Face,  which  you  can  get  at  any  bookstore  for   $7.99.  It’s  not  expensive  and  it  will  really  help  you  understand  female  facial  expression  and   when  they’re  not  into  you  and  when  they  are  –  or  a  forced  smile.  A  forced  smile  is  a  smile  that   happens  when  the  girls  are  not  just  smiling  with  their  eyes;  they’re  just  smiling  with  their   mouths  –  which  is  not  a  good  thing  that’s  happening.   Now  I  want  to  give  you  a  couple  of  things  that  women  say  that  I  like  to  call  speaking  womanese,   which  is  the  secret  language  women  speak  through  subcommunications,  body  language,  facial   expressions,  spatial  relevance,  and  the  underlying  meaning  of  what  they’re  saying.   Let’s  talk  about  the  five  most  common  things  women  say  that  men  misinterpret.  The  first  one  is   “I  have  a  boyfriend.”  This  particular  phrase  can  mean  a  variety  of  things  based  on  when  and   how  it’s  brought  up  in  the  conversation.  The  first  thing  you  have  to  realize  about  girls  telling   you  they  have  a  boyfriend  is  that  it’s  not  always  true.   Oftentimes  the  girl  will  say  she  has  a  boyfriend  just  to  avoid  having  to  be  rude  or  waste  her   time  entertaining  a  guy  she’s  not  interested  in  all  night.  Women  will  also  say  things  like,  “We’re   lesbians,”  or  “We’re  together,”  to  get  rid  of  you  in  a  socially  acceptable  way.   If  a  woman  tells  you  she  has  a  boyfriend  really,  really  on  in  the  interaction  –  like  in  the  first   three  minutes  or  less  –  she  really  means,  “I’m  not  interested  in  you  romantically.”  Women  hate  

social  awkwardness,  so  if  she’s  really  not  into  the  conversation  and  she  can  tell  you’re  hitting   on  her,  saying  she  has  a  boyfriend  is  a  nice,  friendly  way  out  of  the  discomfort.   If  a  woman  tells  you  she  has  a  boyfriend  when  you’re  trying  to  escalate  the  interaction  by   getting  a  phone  number  or  trying  to  get  her  to  leave  with  you,  it  generally  means  of  two  things.   Either  she  has  let  the  interaction  go  further  than  she  intended  and  wants  to  let  you  know  that   you  don’t  have  a  chance,  or  she’s  trying  to  let  you  know  that  this  may  be  a  one-­‐time  thing.   If  a  woman  casually  mentions  a  boyfriend  by  saying  something  like,  “My  boyfriend  and  I,”  or   “We  like  to…”  then  she’s  generally  just  letting  you  know  the  situation,  but  may  still  be  open  to   escalating  the  interaction,  at  which  point  it  becomes  an  issue  of  morality  which  is  outside  of  the   scope  of  my  teaching.   Number  two:  “We’re  not  having  sex  tonight.”  If  a  woman  tells  you  she’s  not  going  to  have  sex   with  you,  she’s  already  thinking  about  it.  Women  throw  up  the  “we’re  not  having  sex  tonight”   objection  because  they  realize  things  are  starting  to  heat  up.  They  do  this  because  they  have  to   be  able  to  maintain  plausible  deniability.  Maintaining  plausible  deniability  means  that  you   always  take  responsibility  for  the  escalation,  which  goes  from  everything  from  making  the   approach,  giving  her  an  excuse  she  can  tell  her  friends  about  why  she  left  with  you,  etc.     Everything  is  your  responsibility,  as  the  girl  has  to  be  able  to  explain  that  she  wasn’t  going  back   to  your  place  to  get  fucked  out  of  her  mind.  She  was  going  over  to  save  some  money  on  drinks   or  have  a  night  cap,  and  then  one  thing  led  to  another  and  what  happens?  It  just  happens.   So  when  she  says,  “We’re  not  having  sex  tonight,”  she  means,  “I  want  you  to  convince  me  that   there  won’t  be  any  consequences  for  me  if  I  have  sex  with  you  tonight.”  This  is  where  showing   a  girl  that  you  don’t  kiss  and  tell  is  crucial.  You  have  to  show  the  girl  that  you’re  not  going  to   hurt  her  reputation  or  lose  respect  for  her  if  she  sleeps  with  you.     If  a  woman  tells  you  she’s  not  having  sex  with  you  tonight,  you  should  always  respond,  “I  was   just  about  to  tell  you  the  same  thing.”  Ideally,  though,  you  want  to  tell  the  girl  that  you’re  not   having  sex  with  her  first.  I  always  treat  that  statement  like  the  finish  line  of  a  race  you  want  to   get  to  before  her.   Number  three:  “I  don’t  kiss,  have  sex,  have  a  threesome  with  midgets  on  the  first  night/first   date/third  date.”  Whenever  a  woman  gives  you  a  rule  like  “I  don’t  kiss  on  the  first  date”  she’s   sending  a  clear  message.  She’s  not  sure  about  you.  She  doesn’t  necessarily  know  if  she  sees  you   in  her  life  long-­‐term  or  if  you’re  just  some  guy  she’ll  go  on  a  couple  of  dates  with  and  forget.   Because  of  this,  she’s  starting  to  lay  down  rules.    

Now,  some  girls  actually  do  have  rules  about  their  dating  life,  but  most  don’t.  Most  women   simply  go  with  what’s  brining  in  the  most  good  emotions.  If  she’s  starting  to  get  all  logical,9   she’s  not  that  into  you.  If  a  woman  says  something  like  this,  it’s  a  great  opportunity  to  interject   some  humor  and  flip  the  script  on  the  girl.   If  a  girl  ever  gives  me  a  rule,  I  respond,  “Cool.  Is  that  your  only  rule,  or  do  you  have  more  before   I  get  to  tell  you  mine?”  Now,  sometimes  she’ll  have  some  more  rules,  but  once  she’s  done,  I’ll   give  her  a  ridiculous  list  of  rules  until  she’s  laughing  so  hard  she’s  forgotten  what  we’re  talking   about.  The  more  random  and  funny,  the  better.  Some  of  my  favorites  are  enforcing  a  casual   dress  Friday  where  she’s  not  allowed  to  wear  pants,  reminding  her  that  Tuesday  is  feed  Jon   grapes  and  fan  him  all  day,  and  more.   Number  four:  “You’re  a  jerk,  player,  asshole,  whatever.”  When  a  woman  playfully  insults  you  or   accuses  you  of  being  a  jerk,  dirty  old  man,  whatever,  she’s  actually  saying,  “I’m  kind  of  attracted   to  you  and  I  want  to  see  if  you’re  really  cool  or  if  you’re  just  pretending.”  Because  men  can  lie,   women  have  to  have  a  way  of  figuring  out  which  guys  are  actually  cool  and  which  guys  are   faking  it.  So  when  you’re  getting  attraction  from  girls  early  on,  they’ll  often  test  you.   The  best  way  to  deal  with  tests  is  to  agree  and  exaggerate.  What  most  guys  do  wrong  is  they   disagree  and  then  try  to  show  a  girl  how  they’re  not  a  jerk  or  a  player.  This  is  bad  because  it   sets  an  underlying  theme  of  you  trying  to  live  up  to  her  expectations  instead  of  vice  versa.     Instead,  you  always  agree  when  a  woman  accuses  or  insults  you,  then  you  exaggerate  the   comment  to  absurdity.  For  example,  if  a  girl  accuses  you  of  being  a  player,  you  can  say,  “Yeah,   I’m  actually  pretty  booked  up  right  now,  but  I  can  slot  you  in  next  Thursday  if  you  promise  to  be   good,”  or  “Yeah,  I  was  recently  voted  the  sixth  biggest  player  in  a  mid  major  city  by  People   magazine.”   Number  five:  “Let’s  just  be  friends.”  When  a  girl  you’ve  just  met  –  not  a  girl  you’ve  known  for   five  years  –  tells  you  that  she  just  wants  to  be  friends,  what  she  really  means  is  that  she  doesn’t   like  you  at  all.  Most  people,  especially  attractive  women,  don’t  make  friends  from  failed  pickup   attempts.  The  fact  that  she’s  suggesting  being  friends  means  that  she’s  not  into  you   romantically.  Plus,  she’s  worried  that  you’re  expecting  something  more.   If  a  girl  tells  you  she  just  wants  to  be  friends,  you’re  pretty  much  out  of  luck.  In  rare   circumstances,  you  can  escape  the  friend  zone,  but  you’re  officially  out  of  being  the  ultimate   relationship  proposition,  which  is  where  we  want  to  be.     So  if  you  actually  do  want  to  be  friends  with  her  without  it  being  part  of  a  long-­‐term  seduction   plan,  continue  to  get  her  phone  number  and  hang  out  with  her.  Just  be  sure  to  mention  that   you’re  only  trying  to  be  her  friend,  unless  (?)  she  suspects  you’re  trying  to  get  in  her  pants.  It  

may  also  be  a  good  idea  to  hang  out  with  her  in  a  mixed  group  of  your  friends  and  her  friends.   This  will  make  it  feel  less  like  a  date  the  first  couple  of  times  you  hang  out.  Female  friends  are  a   huge  blessing.  I  highly  recommend  you  make  them,  but  don’t  misinterpret  “let’s  just  be  friends”   as  anything  other  than  you  have  no  shot  with  this  girl.   Ten  things  women  need  to  know  about  you  before  sex   Lastly,  before  I  wrap  up,  I  want  to  talk  to  you  about  something  that  is  really  important  for   understanding  female  psychology.  Basically,  it’s  the  ten  things  a  woman  needs  to  know  about   you  before  sex.   Everyone  knows  that  women  need  to  know  certain  things  in  order  to  feel  comfortable  enough   with  you  to  have  sex.  But,  not  that  many  people  have  thought  about  what  they  are  because  not   that  many  people  are  obsessive,  nerdy,  dating  coaches  like  myself.   I  first  noticed  this  a  few  years  ago  when  a  couple  of  weeks  in  a  row  I  would  have  girls  back  at   my  place  in  bed  with  me,  and  when  I  was  trying  to  physically  escalate  or  remove  clothing,  they   would  ask  me  some  sort  of  personal  question.   Some  of  them  asked  if  I  had  any  brothers  or  sisters.  Some  asked  me  where  I  grew  up.  One  girl   even  asked  me  what  my  relationship  with  my  mom  was  like.  This  was  enough  for  me  to  realize   that  I  should  probably  be  answering  these  questions  way,  way  before  we  got  to  the  bedroom   which  got  me  thinking  that  there  might  be  more  things  girls  would  want  to  know  about  you   before  they  were  willing  to  give  you  access  to  their  vaginas.   By  knowing  these  questions,  you  can  answer  them  without  the  girl  even  needing  to  ask  and   take  away  a  big  part  of  the  idea  that  she  doesn’t  know  you  well  enough.  If  you’ve  ever  had  a  girl   say  something  like,  “I  don’t  know  you,”  or  anything  in  that  vein  about  it  being  too  soon,  her  not   knowing  anything  about  you  or  you  being  a  stranger,  these  are  probably  the  questions  you   didn’t  answer.   So  with  no  further  ado  and  before  we  wrap  up,  I  want  to  give  you  the  ten  questions  you’re   going  to  need  to  answer  before  sex.   1. What’s  your  name?  And  you  need  to  know  her  name.  Women  are  not  going  to  have  sex   with  you  when  they  don’t  your  name.  They  may  be  drunk  and  not  remember  your   name,  but  at  some  point,  that  needs  to  come  up.  You  can’t  do  an  entire  pickup  from   meet  to  sex  without  telling  the  girl  your  name.  I’ve  tried.  Also,  you  need  to  remember   her  name.  If  I  had  a  dollar  for  every  time  a  girl  has  asked  me  what  her  name  was  right   before  sex,  I  would  have  a  lot  of  dollars.  

2. What  do  you  do  for  work?  Where  do  you  work?  What’s  your  day-­‐to-­‐day  life  like?  What   do  you  do  on  a  day-­‐to-­‐day  basis?     3. Do  you  have  brothers  or  sisters?  What’s  your  family  situation  like?  Do  you  come  from  a   big  family?  Do  you  come  from  a  small  family?  Are  you  close  with  your  brothers  and   sisters?  Are  they  your  best  friends?  Are  they  estranged?  Are  they  frenemies?  Are  they   people  you  don’t  really  talk  to?  That’s  what  they  want  to  know.   4. What  do  you  do  for  fun?  What  do  you  do  in  your  free  time?  Are  you  into  sports?  Are   you  into  partying?  Are  you  into  movies?  Are  you  into  art?  Are  you  into  87  different   things?   5. What  are  you  passionate  about?  What’s  the  most  important  thing  to  you?  What  is  your   passion?  Is  your  passion  work?  Is  it  fighting?  Is  it  food?  Is  it  family?  What  are  you   passionate  about?  What  gets  you  up  out  of  bed  in  the  morning  and  gets  you  excited   about  your  life?   6. Are  you  close  to  your  family?  Really,  are  you  close  to  your  mom?  What’s  your   relationship  like  with  your  parents?  What’s  your  relationship  like  with  mom,  dad,  etc.?   Are  you  close  to  them?  Are  you  estranged?  For  someone  who’s  estranged  from  their   family  like  myself,  that  one  can  actually  be  a  deal  breaker.  There  are  some  women  who   do  judge  you  based  on  your  relationship  with  your  family,  whether  or  not  that’s  correct.   7. Who  are  your  friends?  Who  do  you  hang  out  with?  Do  you  have  friends?  Do  you  have  a   big  group  of  friends?  Do  you  have  a  small  group  of  friends?  Do  you  have  people  you  care   about?  They’re  trying  to  see  are  there  people  in  your  life  that  are  going  to  be  important   to  you  or  are  you  kind  of  a  loner  who  just  does  his  own  thing?   8. What’s  your  longest  relationship?  Can  you  commit?  Women  want  to  know  if  you  can   commit,  whether  or  not  it’s  fair  or  even  they  want  you  to  commit,  women  want  to  know   that  you  could  commit  in  the  past  or  you  have  committed  and  you’re  basically  someone   who  is  not  unserious  about  dating.   9. Where  are  you  from?  Where  are  your  roots?  Where  did  you  come  from?   10. Did  you  go  to  school?  For  someone  like  me  who  didn’t  go  to  college,  that’s  something.   For  someone  who  went  to  college,  your  college  experience  is  an  important  part  of  your   life  in  shaping  who  you  are.  It’s  very  important  that  girls  know  if  you  had  that  experience   or  didn’t  have  that  experience,  etc.   These  are  just  basic  things  that  women  need  to  know  about  you  in  order  to  get  comfortable   with  you.  That’s  going  to  wrap  this  up.  Let  me  recap  what  we  went  over.   We  talked  about  why  women  have  sex.  We  talked  a  lot  about  the  stuff  from  the  book  Why   Women  Have  Sex.  We  talked  about  social  programing.  We  talked  a  little  about  body  language.   We  talked  about  the  ten  questions  women  want  to  know  before  they  have  sex  with  you.  We   talked  about  female  motivation  and  all  of  these  things  that  you  probably  have  never  thought  

about  before  and  that  women  secretly  want,  but  don’t  really  express  or  don’t  really  explain  to   men,  and  that  men  don’t  explain  to  men  either.   By  this  point,  you  should  feel  like  you  have  a  huge  amount  of  knowledge  about  female   psychology  and  that  you  understand  much,  much  better.  I  know  there’s  a  lot  of  information,  so   I  recommend  you  go  over  it  a  couple  of  times  until  these  things  start  to  sink  in  a  little  bit  more.     For  now,  I  know  I’ve  overloaded  you  as  much  as  possible,  so  let’s  end  by  telling  you  to  go   through  it  again  and  think  about  the  things  that  you  really  could  get  better  at  that  I’ve  talked   about.  Think  about  using  those  ten  reasons  women  have  sex.  Think  about  understanding   women  as  emotional  creatures,  etc.   I  think  you’ll  have  much  more  success,  not  just  with  women  that  you  want  to  date  but  with   every  woman  in  your  life.  Since  dealing  with  women  is  a  lifelong  process  whether  you  get   married  or  are  a  player  or  are  anywhere  in  between,  you’re  going  to  be  dealing  with  women  for   the  rest  of  your  life,  so  you  might  as  well  start  to  understand  them  better  which  is  what  the   goal  of  this  is  about.   I  hope  you  enjoyed  this.  Next  month  we  will  have  more  content  for  you.  Also  be  sure  to  check   out  the  accompanying  video,  which  is  all  about  rewiring  your  brain  for  positive  success  with   women  in  the  New  Year.   This  month  is  all  about  the  brains  –  how  women’s  brains  work,  how  our  brains  work,  and  how   to  make  things  easier  to  deal  with.     That’s  going  to  wrap  it  up.  I  will  talk  to  you  next  month.  I  look  forward  to  hearing  from  you   before  then.  Thanks.  Take  care!