Hypnotic Inductions

Table of Contents Hypnotic Inductions....................................................................................................1 Introduction......................................................................................................1 Mirroring and leading.......................................................................................2 Language we use..............................................................................................5 Making it smooth..............................................................................................6 Language presuppositions, reframing and verbal traps....................................8 Structure of a hypnotic sentence.....................................................................11 States and chaining them................................................................................16 Example: a seduction technique.....................................................................17 Example: how to like doing physical exercises..............................................19 What we say vs. what we do (and do not admit)............................................21 State of Power and messages we transmit to the world..................................22 Sensory based information − you need to know what to look for..................25 Example: a handshake interruption technique................................................27 Anchors. Anchoring trance. Anchoring naturally occurring trance...............29 Amplifying states using anchors.....................................................................37 Amplifying states using a positive feedback..................................................38 Confusion and design of short commands for confusion trance....................39 Example: a coffee cup induction....................................................................41 Example: overloading and other stress techniques.........................................41 Example: focus of attention plus negative commands...................................43 Critical faculty and finding a way around it...................................................44 Example: a hand watch induction...................................................................46 Triple spiral and a concept of "different resources for different states".........46 Overlapping modalities. Where should we lead?...........................................48 Direct leading without mirroring....................................................................49 Negative commands and when should we use them......................................50 Congruent and incongruent physiology. How to say "wake up" and put person to sleep...............................................................................................51 Breaking the rapport.......................................................................................52

Table of Contents Hypnotic Inductions Using pauses...................................................................................................53 Maps of reality................................................................................................54 Example: using maps of reality......................................................................54 Example: using gaps in the map of reality.....................................................55 Example: more patterns to interrupt...............................................................57 Rapport as an ultimate technique....................................................................58 Example: leading to deep sleep in two minutes.............................................58 Conclusion......................................................................................................58

Hypnotic Inductions (C) S Projects. Any distribution of any parts of this site is strictly prohibited, unless explicitly stated in text.

All contents of this site is provided strictly on the AS IS basis. The author should not be held responsible for any negative effects that may result from reading or applying the information or using software provided here. The author does not make any medical, financial or other claims − all statements are author's opinion ONLY. Use your own judgement.

Introduction. One man visited Africa and spent some time with the local shamans. After he came back he claimed that he has a superior mental powers and can make people to do anything. Of course one day when he was in the bar his friends challenged him to prove that rather bold statement.

OK, the man said. See this beautiful girl over there? In a moment she will approach me and initiate a physical contact.

So for a minute or two he was staring at the girl and all over sudden she looked at him, signed, walked across the room...

And gave him not one but two slaps over the face!

Look at me like that again, she said, and you will get more.

So as you can see ;) it is possible to use your mental powers to influence people around you. In this book we will go through the techniques and maybe (no promises here) you will also learn how to make results safe and fun for both involver parties.

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Mirroring and leading. Let's do an exercise. Say, we are having a conversation. AND AS I am talking to you I assume your posture AS IF I am your reflection in the mirror. NOW, I reflect you BECAUSE I am in front of you, SO it is natural for your unconscious mind to THINK "he is like me", which is just another way of saying "I trust him". We are working on more rapport (unconscious trust, feeling of "I know you forever) to build trust history and to pass the critical faculty (also known, but not identical to, the so called "conscious mind). I will discuss the critical faculty later.

And as I am mirroring you I might also copy some of your gestures, not all of them but some. It will make your unconscious mind even more confused. If your nose is itchy and you scratch it and I did the same, the brain will see a pattern here. And the feeling of "being alike" will increase.

In the other person it will produce a warm fuzzy feeling. I think it has a lot to do with confusion too, as I am touching you somehow in a very intimate way and you do not see how, so all that is left is the drift towards − yes, you got it! − the altered state of mind. We will call ANY state other than "here and now" an altered state and almost any of them can be used for the hypnosis.

And then I will match the person's breathing. You see, the breathing is the single strongest "control element" that we have. You want to feel powerful − take a powerful breath. One is enough. And when we match it the person is going to trance.

Also you can use what is called a cross−mirroring. For example, you do not want to match breathing of a child − it will be too fast for you. Or you do mot want to mirror a person with lung problems. Bad idea. But you can do a cross−mirroring. Say, your chest moves up and I match this movement by moving my finger. Or doing a little body sway. This is very covert, too.

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3 One more thing about breathing. When we talk we usually breath out. And when we think − we breath out, too. Just because we are used to. So if I want to match your internal dialog, I have to talk when you are breathing out.

And then I am going to match the person's verbal predicates. For those of you who haven't read the Introduction to NLP, here is your chance. Go and read, it is online and it is free. Now, by matching words I make sure the person does not have to do "internal translation", as I am speaking the person's language. And I match voice tonality (if I can, some people sound so damn different. But then − I can speak SO differently, that the person will have to change in order to follow − and it can be a technique, too. That's why half of the "seduction gurus" suggest that men match the woman's voice (and it works) and another half suggests to talk with the deep "sexy" voice (and it works, too). Just remember the man that had mental powers ;). And I match speed at which they talk, too. And the voice level. And pitch. And the way they make pauses...

By now the person's mind should be very confused. You are moving like him, you talk when he is trying to think, you ARE him. This is a way to build the ultimate trust. Later we will learn how to use it.

Lets elaborate a little bit on what should be our next step in mirroring people. As you already know, the more you behave "like" the other person the more this person trusts you on an unconscious level. That's why bikers don't coexist well with cops − different physiology, different predicates, different dress code... you know what I mean.

And you might also notice that we cannot mirror people exactly, just because sooner or later we will make a mistake. And as you make a mistake, if by that time you already have a deep rapport with the person you will notice a very interesting thing. Instead of breaking the rapport (after all, you just proved that you are not "like" them)

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4 the person will follow you by mimicking YOUR behavior. In NLP it is called following (that's what the person did) or leading (that's what you are doing) .

The leading is your ultimate goal, as matching and mirroring by itself is nice but not very manipulative. In some schools of NLP people will not even bother with mirroring − they would go to leading right away! If you do it with confidence and power − the other person will follow, but if you are not sure, or if your are just too different from that particular person − mirror him first and then lead him into your world. I will talk about direct leading later.

What do you think is happening, when the priest in the church says "stand up and pray"? He is leading. And after people follow by standing up, they would more likely accept the next instruction. What do you think is the purpose of military exercises? AT−TENTION! At ease... AT−TENTION... They teach people to follow. Why does the stage hypnotist use commands like "OK everybody, take a deep breath"? Because with the room full of people he cannon possibly match breathing of each and every person. But he can make this people to match HIS breathing, right?

Leading is the powerful hypnotic tool. This book is dealing mostly with NLP, so if you want to know details, I suggest you read the other book, called Hypnosis Tutorial. Just remember that there is no solid border between building a rapport and leading as an NLP tool and corresponding part of the Ericksonian hypnosis. The question is − where do you want to lead the other person. If you lead into the cooperative state of mind − it would be NLP, right? And if you lead into trance − it is called Hypnosis. However it is not that simple. Leading people into your world, especially if it is far from their own world, can be a profound change in their state of mind and it usually results in the deep trance no matter how you call it.

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Language we use. In the Introduction to Hypnosis eBook I described the 5−4−3−2−1 exercise. I am going to repeat it here just in case you have a printed text in front of you and the Internet is not available, and then we will continue with the new stuff.

Enough talking. Let's do a little exercise. Let's describe the room and by doing that let's practice the hypnotic language. For this exercise you will need a partner. Ask this person to sit comfortably in the chair and give him what is called a "sensory−based feedback". What does it mean? Say, if you sit in a chair I can say "you are sitting in this chair". It is the information that the person can verify using his seances. But I cannot say "you are comfortable", because I do not know that.

Let's make five statements. And each time you make a statement, the person's unconscious mind will have to agree with you. This way we are building the trust, or creating so−called "yes set". You say something − the person thinks "yes".

1. You are sitting in this chair. 2. You are listening to my voice. 3. You can feel your hands on your laps. 4. You can feel the temperature of the air in the room.

Notice as I do not know exactly what this person is experiencing, I cannot say that he can notice the air is cold. Maybe it is not − for him. But it does have a temperature. Be as vague as possible. See the "Tranceformations" by Grinder and Bandler for more examples − a wonderful book, by the way. 5. You can feel your chest moving up and down.

OK, we have some history of trust now. Let us continue by making four verifiable statements and adding one command. The idea is that as the person had 5+4=9 of

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6 verifiable "yes" already so the 10th statement will produce an automatic "yes" too. Used in politics a lot, by the way. Do you want a free country for your children? Yes! Do you want more money on the pension plan? "Yes!!!" Will you vote for Rob Smuggle? Why, yes... Or maybe you had this experience in personal life? Do you like me, darling? Yes. Will you buy me this, this and this? How can you say no?

So, here we go.

1. You are sitting in this chair. 2. You are listening to my voice. 3. You can feel your hands on your laps. 4. You can feel the temperature of the air in the room. 5. You feel totally relaxed.

Do I know that you are relaxed? If I am observant enough then I might notice. But what if you are NOT relaxed? Well then, you will make your first step towards relaxation by mentally replying "yes" to the last statement. We are building our bridge around the critical faculty. We go from pacing to leading.

Then we make three verifiable statements and add two leading statements. Then two and three, one and four and then we can just lead.

Making it smooth. Is that all? Not really. Notice that "you do this" and "you do that" sounds a little bit harsh. Can we add some lubricant here to make it more smooth? Yes we can − why else would I bring it up? The language is very important in hypnosis, so let's improve our little hypnotic script.

First of all, why is this guy talking like that? First he spoke about me in the chair,

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7 then about listening to his voice, then he jumped to my hands on my laps... It does not feel natural. Right?

We need to create a feeling that next statement is a logical result of a previous one AND we have a perfect way of creating such a link between statements. There are few of them: "and" will link two statements together, "because" will make one sound as the result of consequence of the other, "while" is same as "because" but with the different grammar as we put it in front of the first statement.

So what do we have now?

WHILE you are sitting in this chair AND You are listening to my voice AND BECAUSE You can feel your hands on your laps AND You can ALSO feel the temperature of the air in the room AND You feel totally relaxed.

The result? It is more of a single statement now. It is more difficult to resist. Consider this real life sales example:

...and you buy this wonderful toy for your children and they will be so happy, do you agree?

Now... If you say no, what do you disagree with? Buying a toy? Or do you disagree that your children should be happy? Can you say no to this?

And what if the person does not want to be relaxed or to follow any of my suggestions, for that matter? What if he just does not like me? Not a problem. Instead of "You are feeling relaxed" I can use "you may feel relaxed". He may if he wants, can he not? Now, "can he not" is another trick for handling this kind of "whatever

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8 you say I disagree" people.

And you can feel totally relaxed, can you not.

Try to say "no" to the above statement. Confusing. And what is confusion if not altered state of mind? We are going in...

It should be mentioned that when you learn how to achieve the State of Power (see Introduction to State of Power) you are achieving the very similar results automatically as somehow people suddenly begin to PAY ATTENTION to you. Then again − you can combine all three of them − NLP, Hypnosis and SP in one irresistible package...

OK, that's it with the 5−4−3−2−1 technique. It works well in the conversation. It works even better in writing or if you are presenting it as a speech. Commercials are using this model a lot.

Language presuppositions, reframing and verbal traps. Speaking of commercials. Remember this one: "you need to choose a safe car for you and your children" − and then they show you this ugly 7 door maxivan that costs half the budget of USA? OK, I am not buying it either ;) However there is an interesting thing you might want to notice about the structure of a commercial, rather than about the merchandize.

They cheated.

They was supposed to say "if you will ever be looking for a large family car and have enough money to burn, you need to choose a safe car for you and your children". Did they do it? No. They used a PRESUPPOSITION that you need a car (and you have

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9 children).

A presupposition is something that we need to keep in mind in order to understand the rest of a commercial. It is a powerful hypnotic and persuasion technique. Let's have few examples, as presuppositions are everywhere.

"You will need to have a good credit history to buy a house". Presupposes − you will need to buy a house.

"Good boys do not leave vegetables on the plate". Presupposes that you need to be a good boy.

"You are tired of this slow Internet connection"... Presupposes that you need this high speed one...

The very structure of a sentence is designed to make a presupposition more difficult to resist. Not because you agree − usually you don't. But because it is covert. It is the other part of the sentence (paragraph) that maters.

This is directly connected to the verbal traps. Consider this example (and it is a real life one). "Buy this toy for your children and make them happy, do you agree?" Try to say no. What does this "no" mean? No, I am not going to make my children happy?

And then there is this thing called a Reframing. As an example of a reframing, let's consider a tooth paste commercial. "...(name of the blend)" − shining smile for all your life". Now let's reframe it. "...(name of the blend)" − shining smile until you are dead".

Same information. Different message. Of course, "they" usually do it the other way around. I decided to use this example to show you how to DEFEND yourself against

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10 the hypnotic commands. A joke is a powerful defense. Someone is embarrassing you? Telling you what to do? A memory you cannot forget? Well, IN YOUR MIND dress this person pink. And add some music at the background. My favorite is from one of the Donald Duck cartoons, but you might have your own preferences. Change the FRAME of your mental picture. A reframing.

What can we do with it to hypnotize others? Well, a lot. First of all, a reframing is showing your mind a direction in which it was never wondering before. So the moment you communicate your reframing idea to the other person, the other person's mind moves into another direction. Another state, that's what it is. An altered state. The change can last for few seconds − and later I will talk about short hypnotic commands that you can deliver while the person is "out there". Or it can last forever − it is called a spiritual experience that changes lives. You can be the source of it, too.

Once upon a time there was a temple and a teacher of great wisdom was teaching his students about Zen. And one of the student noticed that every time the teacher is asked about meaning of life, he would point his finger up to the sky and say nothing. So the student learned to do the same.

And the teacher noticed it and once during a conversation he asked his student about the meaning of life. And the student pointed his finger up − just as the mater of habit. That exact moment the teacher drawn the knife and cut this finger off (and it was not in America, so he never was arrested for it).

Time passed and at some point someone asked the same student about the meaning of life. Automatically, without thinking, the student pointed his finger up. And then he realized that there is no finger. And he reacher satori, of course, they always do it...

This is an example of a reframing (if I am telling you this story). The moment you imagine finger pointing at the sky while there is no finger, but the pointing is still

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11 there − I would have few seconds to do something hypnotic − I will talk about WHAT to do later.

And if you was the student − it would be an example of a pattern interruption technique, and I will discuss this class of techniques later, too. Just keep in mind, that broken bones and missing fingers are not the only way to interrupt a pattern − be kind to people.

Structure of a hypnotic sentence. In NLP and Hypnosis you will hear this one a lot. "Structure of the message is the only important thing". What is a structure? And why is it more important then the content?

One of my favorite examples is about smoking in the monastery. Two friends asked the priest if they can smoke, one got a solid NO and an angry look, and the other got a smile and "yes my son". Same question. Different structure. The first one asked if he can smoke while praying. The second one asked if he can pray when smoking. Go figure these people!

So we want to create a structure that would serve as a delivery package. We need to WRAP a message properly.

First of all, we need to shut down the critical faculty (I will talk about it later). To set up a smoke screen. As the critical faculty serves as a filter that decides what information (including commands) goes in person's brain and what is filtered out, we need it to believe that whatever we are about to say is harmless.

We ask the person to pretend.

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12 There are many ways of doing it. "Let's pretend that you have your problem solved − how would you feel?" What I just did? I asked you to IMAGINE something that we both know is not there. But you can pretend, can you not? And if you read the NLP Tutorial eBook you should already know that there is no difference between the real and imaginary experience.

Let me repeat it again, as it is VERY important. It does not mater if you love cleaning the room or if you pretend that you love it. Because when you pretend, your physiology changes, and your mindset follows, and before you know it − you DO love cleaning your room.

There was an experiment that I would like to quote. They put a monkey in the cage and they was ONLY giving it bananas. And naturally, few days later the monkey hated bananas. So she wouldn't eat. But then the other monkey was put in the cage, a hungry one. And she grabbed a banana and started eating it, and she was really excited − which means − there were some sounds and face expressions involved... And then the first monkey grabbed a banana too, and she started to eat it! Monkey see, monkey do...

So changing a physiology is important and pretending is important. But there is one more lesson we can get from our monkey friends. You see, the monkey was not pretending to be in love with bananas. She was observing someone who was. So...

...if we ask the mon... sorry, the person ;) to pretend that SOMEONE ELSE is doing something − it will be EXACTLY as if the person is doing it.

Because there is "no others" for the unconscious mind. If I tell you something like "relax", you will (if you want) relax, right? Now, if I ask you to IMAGINE being relaxed, you will do the same, and even better − there is no direct command involved! I am not asking you to relax! I am asking if you can imagine being relaxed. And in

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13 order to answer this question you need to actually relax, because only then you can say "yes, I CAN imagine being relaxed". There is also a nice ambiguity between "can you" as in "please do it for me" and "can you" as in "are you capable to". Ambiguities are powerful and I will talk about them a bit later.

For now let's continue our "relax" example. Can you imagine someone being relaxed? What does it mean? For your unconscious mind, that takes everything personally, it is EXACTLY as if I asked you to RELAX. But for the critical faculty, that is supposed to protect your unconscious mind from the unwanted commands, well... there is nothing to protect from! I am telling you about someone else... Not you... No commands...

So the effect of "imagine someone being relaxed" is much stronger than the effect of a direct "relax" command.

And there are also memories about states. How exactly will you "imagine being happy"? If you never did it − there really is no way. And if you was happy − you will remember − not the event, but the state.

And what if instead of asking you to imagine the state, I ask you to REMEMBER the state? Have you ever been happy? Now you will have to remember, and − what a surprise! − you will assume the state!

Because for your unconscious mind there is no past! Only present.

So far so good. Let's think about the language from the other perspective. I already mentioned ambiguities. It is something with double meaning that we can use in such a way, that the conscious mind has nothing to filter out and yes − there is a command that goes to the unconscious mind. Examples?

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14 Few lines above I wrote:"How exactly will you imagine being happy?" Now. Let's do it bit by bit. First, I use my voice tonality or I will nod my head a bit to change the way my voice sounds. I am going to use CAPITAL characters to make it clear and I will also change the punctuation to match my voice. By the way, your unconscious does not care about English grammar.

"How exactly will you IMAGINE BEING HAPPY" NOW. LET'S DO IT bit by bit.

So I used the ambiguity and transformed it into the EMBEDDED COMMAND:

IMAGINE BEING HAPPY" NOW. LET'S DO IT

And as you learn Hypnosis, you will also learn to do this sort of things "as you go".

You think I am done with examples? Let's take a look at the paragraph above. PAY ATTENTION as this one is VERY important.

"And as you learn Hypnosis" − it is a presupposition. I am creating a frame for the conversation. Generally, you don't have to learn Hypnosis. But to understand what I am talking about in the second part of a sentence, you have to accept this idea for some time. And who knows − maybe forever, if I do it often enough.

Also it is an introduction. It is close to the Presupposition, but not quite. I am making sure that your critical faculty wouldn't reject my suggestion. Consider this examples of introductory (weasel) phrases: "can you think of...", "it is as if you can imagine...", "the more you think about..." − they all give you a little push towards accepting whatever follows. Compare: "relax" and "can you remember the time you was totally relaxed". The second one less likely will produce the "leave me alone" response as it sounds less intruding.

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15 Let's continue with the "And as you learn Hypnosis you will also learn to do this sort of things "as you go".

"And as you" is an introduction. "Learn Hypnosis" is a command! And it will work even better if I use my voice to emphasize it a little.

"...you will also" is another introduction. It is very common in hypnotic language to put together two or more loosely related statements, so that it is more difficult to say "no" to each of them.

"...learn to do this sort of things" is another command.

Generally there are two or three parts in the hypnotic command.

An introduction. It is usually a polite invitation. "I invite you to imagine".

A command word. "Imagine" in the "I invite you to imagine" is a command and when delivered verbally, it should be emphasized by voice, gesture or somehow else.

And finally the contents. I invite you to imagine how this girl enjoy the nice warm bath".

Now, first of all, "enjoy the nice warm bath" is another command, and I even changed the syntax which will probably go unnoticed in a conversation. And second − there is no "other girl" for the unconscious − YOU will imagine and YOU will relax.

YOU WILL RELAX was a command and "there is no "other girl" for the unconscious" was an introduction.

Now you see why it is so easy to do and so difficult to catch?

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States and chaining them. We can now ask the person to access the state in such way that the person wouldn't resist. What states should we access?

First of all, it depends from what we want. If you are a parent and your want to make your children more "normal" and less ADD (when people say "attention deficit disorder" I always ask them why wouldn't they give the child this attention. They think it is a joke) then you need a state of "have you ever respected someone's opinion". And if you want someone out of your life, the "have you ever been seek and tired of someone and wanted to stay away from the person" state is what you need.

However there is a rule that we should not bend − the state changes should be gradual.

Not necessarily. Sometimes you can change person's state in a mater of seconds. But usually we are talking about one to fifteen minutes of "normal" conversation.

Why is that? Let's have an example of a sales person selling the food supplement. You cannot start with the "I invite you to imagine someone totally excited about this product" because the most probable response would be "why should I think about crazy people?"

But you can tell a story about yourself (or a friend of yours) that discovered this wonderful product few months ago. I am going to use capital characters as I tell you about this guy. And he kind of GET INTERESTED. NOW. Have you ever had this experience, it is if you SUDDENLY DISCOVER something that you never considered before and NOW you HAVE A slightly different point of view on it, as if (introduction) you ASK YOUSELF can this be USEFULL FOR ME? NOW the more you (the more − the more is a link that makes more difficult to say "no" as you are

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17 not sure which part of two statements you are resisting) THINK (command) ABOUT THIS OPPORTUNITY the more you REALIZE (command) that there are, you know... (pause, more of pauses later) people (you are talking about others, but as there are no others for the unconscious mind) who loose the opportunity and there are people (your voice slightly happier here) who USE AN OPPORTUNITY. Because (a link)...

So we started at level zero and we created a state of a slight curiosity. Then we created an opportunity and we created a challenge (use it or loose it). And then we created a more exciting state. And so on until at the end HE will ask YOU to sell the product.

So we need to CHAIN the states so that between the "I don't care" and "I care" states some intermediate states are inserted.

Example: a seduction technique. I am not a very big fan of hypnotic seduction techniques as you can BECOME attractive using the State of Power techniques rather than pretending to be attractive. However if you pretend long enough you will become what ever you are pretending to be and all seduction techniques are about changing a man and only a little bit about manipulating the woman.

So please remember, that if you do this technique ONLY and do not have an underlying confidence and integrity − it will not work. Or most likely will not work as there are always exceptions. And if you use the NLP, Hypnosis and State of Power techniques to CHANGE YOURSELF − you will become attractive to the members of the opposite sex, and then you may or may not want to use patterns...

First, we describe a state of a mild interest. We tell a story. I am going to talk about

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18 stories later, for now just keep in mind that it should have the STRUCTURE of the state you are creating. If you are working on the state of mild interest − make sure you structure the "script" so that it would work no mater if you are talking about your relations or your trip to Downtown...

Actually, can you ask a girl to feel slight interest to YOU? No? What about interest to someone else? You don't want a competition? How about a memory?

Had you ever been talking to some person and you like don't care and all over SUDDEN you NOTICED something about this person that you might FIND INTERESTING? It is as if you TELL YOURSELF − it is interesting. I would LIKE TO KNOW MORE about it...

So this is a beginning. Generally speaking you cannot go far talking about your relations or her relations for that mater. Well... unless you have a rapport... But then you probably do not need patterns...

Then you switch to the other story about another state. You want her to feel excited about being with you − tell about your experience with jumbo jumping. Make sure the STRUCTURE of your story matches the structure of the (love? sex? whatever). Tell about exciting feeling of going up to THIS THING and how you think that it is so scary and yet you know it is totally safe... And the jump and exciting ;) movements up and down... You can describe a lot − and still get away with it. But the state you created will be there and will be associated with you.

To make it even (after all, men can be seduced too) let me give you an example of a seduction technique for woman. It is called a Mexican Shower and is based on the MEN's psychology. I can go into the explanations and believe me − they are not nice ;) But let's just stay with the technique.

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19 You are a girl. NOW ;)

You meet a man and you are very friendly and playful. And the man thinks one of two things. Either "she is easy" or "I want her".

Next time you are cold and barely notice a man. He will think about you. And you know the way men think ;)

Next time you are playful again.

Usually 2−3 times is enough to make men crazy about a woman. Hypnosis? No. Basic psychology and a little bit of pattern interruption.

Example: how to like doing physical exercises. To your surprise, it is much more difficult to make yourself to exercise. regularly then to seduce a girl (or a man). Let's take an example from the State of Power class to show you how to do it. It is more of manipulation then of a Hypnosis, but why not? We need result and not the label. And we will also learn about positive stimulation in process.

So you are doing physical exercises. Oh, no! Yes, you do! And you are doing them, starting Monday,,, I don't know what is wrong with Monday, but it is the most difficult day of the week. Probably because it is always the first day we do physical exercises. And the last day. Who had this experience?

My favorite is push−ups, because at some point I really hated it... Because when you are doing push−ups − are you happy at that moment? Keep smiling. No, you are not happy. You are tired, you need air, your muscles are sore... So why are you doing it? Because you want this push−ups to make you strong and slim and healthy some day.

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20 Some day − but do you have anything to ENJOY now?

And what are you thinking when you are doing these push−ups? Oh, no! Why am I doing it? Oh, I am so sore! Oh, I hate it! Right? Now, anybody remember what an anchor is − I was talking about it in the Introduction to NLP? It is when we create a state and link it to the way to access it. To the trigger. So what will you feel next time you think about the physical exercises? You will feel bad.

So is there a way for you to be happy using this strategy? Sort of. Lets say you was persistent. Then some time later you notice that it works and you look better and feel stronger now. It is your REWARD and you might feel good about the whole thing. But you need to get some results first. That is part of your strategy: get results, then be happy about it. Right?

Wrong!

Using this strategy you will almost never get anywhere − too much suffering, too little motivation. Your strategy has too many "exit points" − every time you feel bad you will be tempted to exit. To stop doing what you do. To go back to the fridge full of chocolate. Bad strategy!

Let's design a good strategy now. Knowing what we already know it is so simple! First you SMILE! And you MAKE yourself happy. And you believe in your wonderful self. You can do ANYTHING. And you are feeling good about it. And then guess what will happen? You do push−ups with this happy smile of a dummy on your face. That's right. Why would you want to exit a strategy if it makes you feel good? You wouldn't...

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What we say vs. what we do (and do not admit). This chapter is NOT about hypnosis. However in order to hypnotize or to somehow else make changes in people's behavior, we need to understand it first. And it is a very important moment that cannot be omitted when you are approaching your "subject" or simply put − another person.

Also keep in mind that regardless the fact that we are talking about control issues here, the manipulation is NOT your primary objective − you need to understand people's motives AND to be flexible.

Let's have an example. Just keep in mind that the same "logic" is applicable to many areas of our relations. I am using the "relations with the opposite sex" just because this area is SO suppressed that MOST OF THE TIMES we have no idea what our real motives are.

So let's say you are a man. And your wife is a nice woman and you two love each other. It's just... sometimes... you know... Something happens to her. She gives you the hard time. Not always, and no mater how hard you try, you cannot figure out what's going on.

What did I do wrong, darling?

Nothing. And everything.

It is almost genetically predisposed (always − because I cannot prove it) that the woman need a strong man. Not all women, but many of them. And how can she find if her man is still strong? By testing him. That's what it is (in some cases, not always) about. Testing. And if you respond as a strong man (no "I am so sorry, what did I do?") then she is satisfied − for some time.

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22 But if you respond as a weak man − she will repeat the test soon enough. And then again. And again.

There are two points here. First, she is NOT mean. She still loves you. And second − if you know the "real" reason of her behavior − you can adjust yours. And if not... can hypnosis help you? NO. Because − what would you do using Hypnosis? Making your wife love you? She already does!

There is a similar mechanism that men use. And they can interact. And there are always exceptions. So the only thing you can do is to keep an open mind. It is an important tool − the open mind. The mind is like a parachute. If it is closed, it doesn't work.

State of Power and messages we transmit to the world. Let's talk about the behavior of a Hypnotist. Have your fork in your left hand while... No. Not this behavior. The other one.

In the State of Power eBook I am talking a lot about the fact that the world is paying attention to the message we transmit to it.

For example, studies show that the criminals consistently pick the weakest person in a crowd to be their victim − and as I am not talking about the physical weakness, there probably is some way for them to unconsciously figure out who is READY to be a victim. How?

The idea is very simple. We don't just have our physiology and our state of mind as two separate things. They are related and one can affect another. Let's try an

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23 experiment. Sit straight. Unwrap your shoulders. Keep your head straight. Smile wide. Take a deep powerful breath. And now KEEPING THIS PHYSIOLOGY say "it is the most miserable day of my life". Doesn't really work, does it?

This was an easy one. What important is that ANY thought affects our physiology and ANY change of physiology affects our thoughts. And there is one more piece of this puzzle.

Other people.

As our brain is a natural pattern recognition system, it has NO PROBLEM "reading" your physiology. It wouldn't present your conscious mind with the detailed report, like "when the dark room was mentioned, the left corner of his mouse went down four millimeters for about 3 seconds". No. It will give you the INTUITION instead. And the criminal will pick the victim from the crowd. And the girl will instantly know that you are a looser (unless you STOP BEING A LOOSER). And the other person will instantly know if the Hypnotist is confident in his abilities or if he is a fake.

So we need to be confident. We need to use the exercises. (see for example free online brochures on the State of Power and NLP or corresponding (and with much more details) eBooks on (again) State of Power and NLP) to boost our confidence, like moving around submodalities, Swish, State of Power... We also need to have it as an automatic behavior.

What is the difference between an automatic behavior and the "conscious behavior"? Two things. First, to "consciously" be brave (for example) you need to make and to keep an effort. And this will require some resources and therefore you will have less resources left.

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24 And second, it is not fast enough. Confidence should be there when you need it, and I am talking about SAME SECOND. The condition−response sequence is fast enough. The "positive thinking" is not.

A real life example. A criminal approached a man asking for the wallet. The man INSTANTLY replied with sincere surprise in his voice: "but it is HIS (pointing behind the criminal's back) wallet. Then he had one second to deliver a hypnotic kick ;) and that's exactly what he did. Could he get this valuable second of hesitation from his opponent if he had to look for the solution? No. There is no time to loose.

How do we make the behavior (confidence and power in this case) automatic? I already mentioned the SWISH technique. Another way is by rehearsing. Make a decision. From now on all your internal dialog is going to be POWERFULL. And if you catch yourself thinking as a looser? You stop. Soon enough you will have the desired behavior MOST OF THE TIME − and it includes the time when you need it.

Never show the weakness (unless it is part of your strategy). For example, you are working with the client. And something happened − the client started to shake. And you have no idea what it was. You can:

1. Stop the session, and start asking "are you OK?". Bad idea. The client is already scared and now he knows that you are scared, too.

2. Smile and say "it was a big one, wasn't it?" Here you used the past tense − the problem is in the past. Just another language trick. AND you are letting the client know that you are still in control. Good idea.

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Sensory based information − you need to know what to look for. You probably are not a telepath. If you are − good for you, but most people are not. And most hypnotists are not. I never met a telepath anyway, at least they wouldn't tell me.

So how do you know that the person is in trance, and how do you know that it was you who did it and how do you know in what direction you should push your client next time?

By observing the signs that are available for our five senses. There are many signs of the trance if you know where to look. Let me list some. Just remember that people are different. For the other person my "fully awake here and now" experience is (according to Richard Bandler) way beyond any LSD induced state. Not that I am so weird, no. Just people feel the world differently and so the signs of trance can be different, too. But mostly they are the same ;)

Also there are different types of trance, so if I tell you that in trance the person moves slower − believe me, but keep in mind that there is a karate trance, where the person moves really fast. But is he fast with mathematics in this state? No. Different states. Different resources.

Defocused (deluded) eyes. Very good sign of trance. Also the eyes are producing slightly more tears (perhaps because blinking is getting slow? But sometimes blinking is getting fast... depending on the person) so you can also pay attention to this.

Changes in breathing pattern.

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26 Increase in salivation. Now, how can we notice THAT? Well, here is the clue: the person swallows the saliva more often. If the trance is REALLY deep (you can do it but then you will be the only person talking. The other person will be very slow) then he will stop swallowing so you better have a napkin ready. Seriously.

Changes in the muscular tension, especially face muscles. I knew the guy who couldn't tolerate the girl with the "stupid" face. Guess what? Every time the girl felt attracted to him and she would go to trance, he would misinterpret the face expression for "stupid". End of the relation.

If the person is in the kind of trance he likes, you will also notice the lip−licking. That is a good sign that whatever you are communicating to the person is attractive (to the person).

Skin color. Yes we can turn red or pale. We can do it with all of our skin or with part of it (spots). There is also skin tension, so you should pay attention on how the light is reflected from the skin.

And people sweat.

And they smell − yes you can notice the changes in the way person smell! Pay attention.

And they do gestures and sometimes trance gestures are totally different from "normal state" gestures.

And their voice changes (a very well known example − the boy is loosing his voice when talking to the attractive girl).

And so on... Pay attention!

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Example: a handshake interruption technique. There is a lot of noise around this one. It's really very simple and almost irresistible − when you do it right. So let's learn to do it right. Also keep in mind that it is NOT the only one and not the most useful one of the pattern interruption techniques. Later in this book I am going to describe half a dozen of other techniques from this category.

What is a pattern of behavior? It is something we do automatically, without thinking about it. As the mater of fact, it is so automatic that it has NO MIDDLE. Like a handshake.

If you describe a handshake, it will go like "first, offer your hand. Then grab the other person's hand..." And this is a correct description. But the truth is − it has became a condition − response sequence LONG TIME AGO for most of us and especially for the men (men are shaking hands more often). So when it happens, we are not going through the checklist, like "hand offered − check..." We just do it.

Now − suppose that I initiate a handshake (or you can initiate it − doesn't mater) and I am confident, of course. You know exactly what to do − you are reaching for my hand. And then in the middle, BEFORE our hands touched each other, I grab your right wrist with my left hand and raise it, as if you have a little mirror in your hand (on your palm) and I want you to look in this mirror. The pattern is interrupted. You have NO PROGRAM for this scenario (some people do. People from special forces, for example. They are trained to strike first and to analyze later). And as you have no program − you have to GO DEEP INSIDE looking for a solution. What to do? And as you are "deep inside" now (you are still noticing all these little hypnotic patterns here, right?) and you are actively looking for a program − I have a chance to give you this program. I will talk about the "short commands" later in this book.

What are the important details? First of all, I already mentioned CONFIDENCE. You

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28 should give away no warnings that something is coming. Look at other people shaking hands and notice if they are looking on their hands? Or are they looking at the face of the other person? Or do they look at the hand and then at the face? There is a rule (not for all techniques!) that if you want to confuse a person you need to look between his eyes as if you are pushing with the beam from your eyes on the spot between his eyes (the "third eye" if you want to use this terminology). This behavior is a pattern interruption by itself as the person expects the look in the eyes (that's approximately where you are looking) but there is no "look in the eyes"... And he is confused... And as you keep doing it − confusion is growing. Powerful staff.

After you grabbed the opponent's wrist, move to his left. The objective here is not to be in front of the person, as it makes more difficult for him to stop looking at his palm and to look at you.

After you delivered a command, move back to the position in front of the person, bring his hand down and complete the handshake.

An important point here is about creating two realities. I am going to discuss it later in the chapter about the "triple spiral". The idea is that if you behave differently before and during the pattern interruption and after you are done your behavior change back to the "before" type − your opponent might just forget about the whole experience.

Let's have an example of a partial handshake interruption during business negotiations. You are gone and the business partner asked for some time to think about the proposal you give him. You are doing the "good buy hand shake". Before your hands touch each other you say with energy and enthusiasm, smiling "well, it was a pleasure (hands almost touching, but then you move your hand away as if you are using your hand to point your pointing finger up − people do this gesture to "make a point". Just do not complete this movement so that hands are still close and

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29 your partner do not disengage − he should still be in a "handshake mood"). And you say "I expect great results" with different voice tonality and − should I mention that by that moment you should be in a total rapport matching at least the posture and breathing? Then you complete a handshake and say with the "before" voice "see you again soon".

What just happened?

When you created a state of confusion by offering the person a hand and then taking it back, you created a trance and the person's "conscious mind" went on a quest for the answer "what to do next". And then − being in rapport − you are saying "I expect..." Well, for the person's unconscious mind (no others!) it is HIS expectations! Bingo.

There is also a large area (as I mentioned) about what to say, how to use the ambiguities and negative commands in a short phrases and about the way your voice should sound and your mimics should look. I am going to discuss it in the next chapters.

Anchors. Anchoring trance. Anchoring naturally occurring trance. You worked hard so far. You spent at least five minutes bringing the person into the state you want. You have all "textbook" signs of trance and he/she is following you without any interference from the critical faculty (see below). And then some idiot is walking right into your conversation with the standard idiot greeting number one "Hey dude (friendly punch in the person's shoulder. THAT sure will alter person's physiology and break the state), how are you? Good? Me too. See ya..." And the entire work of the last five minutes is ruined! You can do it again of course, but with

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30 the corner of your eye you see bunch of other idiots that are waiting to approach you with idiot's standard greeting... or so it seems. If only you could have the Save button! You know, like in a computer game when you know that you are about to be killed by the monster around the corner of this dark corridor, you just save your game and reload it later so that you can continue from where you was and have the second (twenty second?) chance.

Well, bad news for you. This button does not exist. Now good news for you. You can CREATE this button. And as it is a real world and not a computer game, creating buttons here is fast, easy and it is fun. Those buttons are called ANCHORS.

It all began with the Pavlov and his dogs. When you feed the dog − the dog salivates. Now, when you feed the dog AND ring the bell, the dog thinks "what the hell was that?" and still salivates. As the brain (including dog's brain) is the pattern detection machine, soon enough it will figure out that ring and food are related. So when you ring the bell the dog salivates. Now, humans are like dogs. Does it ring a bell for you? Yes, some of them are not, some of them are like angels. That's not what I mean. People are like dogs BECAUSE their brain is doing the same pattern detection job. And if you ring the bell...

I remember the story from my school time. I just graduated and came to school to attend some kind of celebration where the principle would congratulate us and give us some further directions. But I already was a free man, which means − no classes. So was the rest of my classmates that was waiting in the hall, some sitting, some standing and having the casual conversation.

And then the bell rung! Remember − we was NOT supposed to go to any class. But... Everybody − and I mean − everybody − stood up and did couple of steps in the random directions, or changed the person they was talking to. And no one noticed! Except for me ;)

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31 Now, THIS particular button was installed by over ten years of practice. You hear the ring − you go somewhere. Can we install it faster? To answer this question I invite you to think about phobias as about a button, or an anchor that was installed, sometimes by the single event in the person's happy life and then work reliably for the rest of the person's miserable life! Unless of course this person runs across an NLP−trained guy, in which case the phobia is gone within five minutes but it is a different story that I know is in works of Bandler and Grinder but I personally like using it with the timeline as in Time Line Therapy and the Basis of Personality. Sometimes not. Sometimes it is so simple, you just started and phobia is already gone.)

Alternatively you can use the State of Power state (see the State of Power Tutorial) but it is too long if you only want to cure the phobia. The State of Power is for those who want to achieve major change in their lives, in all areas.

I want to stress that NLP and modern Hypnosis as well as many "borderline" techniques, like modern seduction techniques (it is out there. On the streets. Ignore it, if you want) are based heavily on the anchors. Learn to THINK using this model, learn to apply the "buttons" concept FIRST and only then consider other explanations, like "I liked him because he has a rich personality". NLP gives you unprecedented opportunity to find and if you choose to − destroy the anchor so that your behavior is not affected by the irrational consequences of something that happened to you when you was four years old.

You can also build new anchors, ones that would give you the necessary resources in the necessary situations. Afraid to approach a woman? Scared by the very thought of speaking in public? How about creating an anchor where the trigger (bell ring) is the situation you are uncomfortable with and the response (salivation) is the state of mind you want − like confidence or excitement? And now every time you approach the woman, you will be salivating... Just kidding... Just kidding...

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32 So how do we set an anchor? Keeping in mind, that anchor is the condition−response and nothing more, we need to find a state that we need and to find a trigger that we need and as the person is in the desired state we do the trigger, or as NLP folks would say − we fire an anchor.

Let's say we need the humorous state. We want this person to smile every time you want and humor is good for it. Tell the joke. Something like "One drop of nicotine kills the horse. One drop of whisky − and horse is up and running again". Or "if it does not work the first time, then probably sky diving is not for you". Wait for the reaction. The moment before the peak of the reaction touch the person's hand. That is an anchor. You can do it again if you want to make anchor stronger.

Now, there is an important point I want to stress, it is timing. As you observe the person building up a laughter, anchor the state right before the maximum. If you do it after the peak of an emotion, you are anchoring the "stop laughing" state which is not what you want.

Do it covertly. The less aware the person is about anchor − the better it works, but there are exceptions.

Make sure the trigger is unique. The handshake is an example of a really BAD anchor − it is fired all the time, especially with men so the anchor will soon wear off.

In the American society, where the percentage of Auditorial people is negligible, a voice tonality, tempo, pitch or the direction of the voice (which way you look while talking) will almost always go unnoticed. Say you are in the business negotiations. Then talk about good things looking slightly left and talk about bad things while looking slightly right. And then use this anchor − talk about your services while looking slightly left and if the conversation touches services of your competitors (and if not − you can always bring it up) − talk about them while looking slightly right.

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33 This way your opponent will get an unconscious message saying "this guy is good and his competitors are not".

When you attend the presentation, move while you are talking. Stay in different spots, while talking about different subjects. It is called a spacial anchor.

Another example − calling a child by the full name is usually an "I am in trouble" anchor for him. Is it good? What if the teacher calls him by the full name − will the child feel helpless?

Visual anchors are very powerful, especially in the situation when you cannot touch the person. I hope TV will never be able to translate kinestetics (i.e. sense of touch). Can you imagine what they will do in commercials? So far they can only show us pictures (and an image can be an anchor − think of the Coca−Cola logo) and sounds.

Smell is one of the most powerful anchors. Perfumes are used for this purpose for ages. Smell of the dentist's office will make most people nervous. Stores use aromatizers to create relaxed state in the customer mind and to bring him back − if you walk into the store and smell flowers, you will FEEL GOOD. And when you want to feel good − where would you go? Not to the store in which you smell burning rubber that's for sure. What about the travel agency that is using "smell of the ocean" aromatizer? Sea... I want to go there... here is my credit card...

The first thing that comes to mind is to use anchors to move the person from one state to another. It works well if the state is mild and the anchor is strong. Remember all those Hollywood movies when the young man is afraid but then he gets a gun and now he believes (and he is wrong, after all it IS a Hollywood movie) in himself and he is not afraid anymore? Well, the gun is an anchor that fires up the "I am powerful" state and it was installed − what a surprise − mostly by other Hollywood movies.

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34 Or remember those amulets that people suppose to touch, or strange rituals they do, like touching the wall every time before you go play tennis? This is an anchor and YES, IT WORKS. So do not laugh when people do it.

There are other ways however, to make the anchors work for you. What if the state is so profound and so unpleasant that you cannot think of a single positive state that would overweight it? Or what if the desired state is very far from the state you want to change? You cannot expect that when the person is scared to death with the public speaking he is about to perform, you just touch his hand and he magically changes into the confident and ready to rock−and−roll state.

To deal with a situation like that we must ask ourselves a question − how does this change happens in "real life"? Today the person is scared, or sad, or feels powerless and tomorrow he is fine, laughing and having great time − what happened in between that made those changes possible?

The answer is... OK, how do you eat an elephant? − One piece in a time. How do you change strong negative state? One piece in a time. You do not want to do a "quantum leap" change, you would rather perform three, maybe four little steps.

Think about it as about driving the car − do you start with 4th gear right away? No. You accelerate one step in a time.

OK, now we have our anchors, for example two of them. One for "bad" existing state and one for "good" desired state. Let's say that every time you are in certain circumstances you feel depressed. And you want to feel resourceful and generally good. You found the desired state and set up an anchor. Now, fire the first anchor that is for the original state. You can do it on yourself with the little practice or you can do it on someone else. When doing it observe the person's behavior and all verbal and non−verbal clues. It is called a calibration. When you fire an anchor you should be

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35 able to notice the person's physiology change to the physiology of the state you anchored. At the peak or almost on the peak of the state but NOT after the peak fire the second anchor, the one you have for the desired state.

Let me get back to the "SMILE" part. What will happen if every time you feel depressed you catch the very beginning of it and force yourself to SMILE? Say, you are depressed every time you think about particular event. Keep thinking, just SMILE and sit straight. Some time later you may find that you are smiling automatically as you think about it.

What happens is you make the first state to act as an anchor for the second state, so whenever you go to the first state it fires the second state! So the moment you feel depressed, you BEGIN SMILING.

This technique is called Chaining of Anchors. One of NLP favorite places to set anchors for this technique is on person's nockles. There are enough of them to create long chain and it is a good place as those anchors are not usually fired by accident. But you can use shoulders, hands, gestures, voice tonality − anything you want. I read a story about a salesperson, who wanted to be a "family man" at home and an aggressive salesperson at work − I do not remember where I read it, so unfortunately I cannot credit the source. So entering home became an anchor for "family man" state and exiting home was used to switch him back to "shameless salesman". For the person who is afraid of rejections and who in the same time have to do phone marketing the phone can be made an anchor. Picking up the phone should fire pleasant state of anticipation, or something like that.

At this point you might ask if all this anchors have anything to do with Hypnosis. They do, otherwise why would I put hem in this book ;) Because you see, we can ANCHOR the trance state.

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36 Why do we need it. First of all, as I already mentioned, to save our work and to "reload" it later so that we don't have to go through the entire process again.

Also we can anchor state associated with something else and then use it for totally different things. Example? OK.

Ask the person if he ever experienced the state of excitement, when he was so into something, he couldn't wait to get it.

Anchor this state.

Tell the person about this food supplement you are selling and while doing it − fire the anchor. Unethical? Go take a look at the commercials.

You can also use anchors to amplify the state, any state, including the Hypnotic trance. Ask the person if he ever was sleepy, very, very sleepy ;) Anchor this state. Then ask the person if he ever was hypnotized. Anchor this state. (Don't ask if he was drunk. Bad idea. It is VERY difficult to hypnotize drunk people. Slightly intoxicated − yes, but not drunk). Anchor this state. Now fire two anchors in the same time − and you might end up with a more profound state. Don't forget to anchor it.

There is also Swish and other anchor chaining techniques (see the NLP Tutorial). If you have person in "here and now" state, don't expect that as soon as you scratch your nose (an anchor) he would fall asleep. But if you have few anchors, each for a more "relaxed" state − you can fire them one after another, moving the person through the chain of states, deeper and deeper.

Where do you get those states? Especially if the person is not willing to talk to you about "have you ever" past experiences?

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37 You observe the person's signs of trance, that I mentioned above. You see, sometimes you don't need to create a trance. Sometimes people can go "deep inside" by themselves, and you only need to notice and to anchor this state. I know a woman who is an amazing hypnotist. She has her favorite anchor − she is anchoring men looking at her breast. That's right. The moment they are "gone" is a good moment to set an anchor. Why waste a powerful state?

Amplifying states using anchors. As I already mentioned, the states can be amplified using anchors. But firing few anchors in the same time is not necessarily the best choice. Because we have the SUBMODALITIES (see the NLP Tutorial) and as for each state, there are submodalities for a trance state. And we can use them as anchors for the trance − simply by describing them! Something like that:

And as this friend of mine was looking at the mental image of this situation, the image was getting bigger, and brighter and he could notice that the colors of the image are brighter NOW and he was also able to HEAR THE SOUND of the sea at the background...

What was I doing here? First, I found what are the submodalities the person is using for whatever situation I described (the initial situation). It is a situation where the person's state is "here and now" so I don't really care what it is about. I want STATE. And then I describe the submodalities (picture changing) of a trance state (I have to ask, or to observe in order to know where to lead, unless I am looking for ANY altered state).

It is not a natural way of talking to people. However you can do it − if two conditions are met. First, you should be in rapport. When the rapport is good (and you achieve it by mirroring) you can talk about ANYTHING. And second − don't talk to the person

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38 about his experience. Tell the story instead. As there is no "others" for the unconscious mind, the result will be the same.

Amplifying states using a positive feedback. If you want a dolphin to jump through the ring, you need to stimulate it with the fish. So that there is a reason for the dolphin to behave the certain way.

And as dolphins, humans can be stimulated, slightly pushed in the right direction. The only problem − humans (most of them) do not like raw fish.

What do they like?

They like appreciation. So give it to them. When having a conversation, notice the sign of a trance, and smile, or nod your head, or say (as if you agree with what the person is saying) "that's right".

And this technique ALONE can move the person to the deepest trance state.

It is called a positive feedback. The changes are happening on an unconscious level, so the person might not agree that you have anything to do with it. My favorite example is with the students that decided to manipulate their professor. Every time professor would go to the right side of the room, they pretended to be bored. Every time he would go left, they would pay attention and look interested. Three classes later the professor was teaching the class with his back against the left wall of the room! And he had no idea − ever.

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Confusion and design of short commands for confusion trance. Let's return to the confusion trance and particularly − to the commands we are supposed to give during it.

First of all, it does not necessarily have to be short commands. You can use confusion state to set an anchor, and you can also give a command that will deepen the trance − and buy you more time. But for this chapter let's stick to the short commands.

They are not for the conscious mind. So forget about the English grammar. Think STRUCTURE. Say, you want to make a person excited (about you or your product). After you created a state of confusion, you can say "exciting" − and that will be enough. You don't have to go with "I demand that you feel excited about the food supplements I am selling".

It might contain description of a state (excited) and commands (now excited). A command is telling what to do and basically − it is an order. You can give an order now, because the critical faculty (a conscious resistance) is already taken care of.

It can contain introduction part, but you might want to move it outside the confusion state. Say you are giving the "good buy handshake" saying "I invite you to..." (doing the pattern interruption) "...think (a command) exciting benefits (no grammar)" (completing the handshake) "...NOW! I am going to call you tomorrow and..." (conversation goes on).

It should be covert. You don't want to get caught. It is not good in the therapy session and it is totally unacceptable in the "real world". So make sure your commands are socially acceptable even if they are failed to pass the critical faculty. A good example

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40 is Richard Bandler's "you know it because I close to you" − the "I close" sounds like an "EYE CLOSE" command, and people would close their eyes, but can you catch his hand? No. He didn't say anything. The example from seduction techniques − "...think about this new direction..." − the ambiguity here is with the "NUDE ERECTION" − and even this one cannot be caught!

Ambiguities are powerful tools, and you will find a lot of them in the list of recommended books. Use them and learn to notice and collect them.

Here is an example (not very short) that I received from my bank: "get one step closer to getting a free flight every time you use this card..." What is it about? Are you going to get a free flight EVERY TIME or are you getting one step closer every time? Your unconscious mind would probably pick the most exciting (and wrong) of this two readings of the same ambiguous phrase.

Use pivot words. "get out YOU are so nice" is a rather bold way to ask someone to leave. There are countless examples − learn to notice them.

Use the "buttons" that people have, to design commands that cannot be rejected. For example, the command that has a reference to the danger probably will be considered as a priority − your unconscious mind is very concerned with your safety.

To learn more about "buttons", read the Virus of the Mind : The New Science of the Meme by Richard Brodie. There are primary buttons, like sex, danger, children. There are secondary buttons, like ones installed by the society. Consider this pivot phrase "agreement WONDERFUL children you have".

And do not concern yourself that the phrase "sounds strange". After all, we are after a state of confusion here, aren't we?

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Example: a coffee cup induction. This is another pattern interruption example, and much more useful one, than the handshake. Imagine sitting with the other person somewhere in a restaurant (or at the business negotiation table, or at home, as you might want to "hypnotize" your 5 years old son to do the homework for a change). And you are offering the other person a cup of coffee. A pattern! Can we interrupt it? Yes. Pour the coffee over him ;) Actually, I was not kidding. It will create an altered state and you will have a chance to deliver a command. But for now, let's just move cup away, as if we are playing a game. Can we do it on the business negotiations? Yes. It will look as if you interrupted your behavior to say something important. People do it. The "something important" will be your command, by the way.

What is important in order to succeed? First of all, the rapport. You need to be in synch with the other person, the more in synch, the deeper trance will occur when you do something unexpected.

Then confidence. After all, it is a COMMAND you are delivering. Now an excuse.

Example: overloading and other stress techniques. Now, don't think that you can only hypnotize a relaxed person. Remember: we are looking for altered states of mind. Any altered states. Why? Because you are not used to think critically in the altered states of mind. And what can be a better example of an altered state than an old good stress?

There is a very powerful technique, that is used by street thiefs. It works like that. Two or mote people − usually they would use woman in their late fifties, so that your

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42 natural aggression response does not work − will approach you from different directions. They begin talking − all in the same time − and they are talking about something like your future, accidents, diseases − scary staff. As this stuff seems to be important for your well−being you must pay attention, right? And they will talk − one in the left ear and one in the right ear. And they will also touch you. Now, your conscious mind will struggle for answers. What to do? What to tell? How to keep their hands off your valet? What is going on? It will take about three minutes before they are gone, and your wallet is gone, and your wedding ring is gone too. And you cannot understand why you didn't do anything. In many cases they would approach like a 100 kilogram wrestler who can defend himself − same result. It is called overloading and there is plenty of techniques based on this idea, most of them far less dramatic, by the way.

Then again, there is a group of people who cannot be hypnotized this way, so you should always be creative when you choose the approach. What kind of people will resist this induction? The ones that have the program of behavior in this situation. The Strategy. For example there are people for whom there is a "default" response to any confusing situation − they jump right to the uncontrolled aggression. I don't particularly like this kind of people, but in this case − they will have an advantage. There are other kinds of responses, of course. You can run away. Scream. Anything. But it should be an automatic behavior as your critical faculty, your conscious mind will be too busy at the moment.

Another example of using stress for hypnosis. Each person have the "comfortable distance" that he would like to maintain during the conversation. It is a personal and a cultural thing in the same time. If you put together Italian and British, then Italian will try to get a bit closer − unconsciously, I mean. It is his comfortable distance for the conversation. British on the other side, will try to keep a bit of a distance as THIS is his cultural habit. Guess what? British will back off and Italian will move forward!

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43 Psychologically it works to the advantage of Italian as his unconscious would say something like "he is running! I am stronger!" while British will feel at disadvantage − same reason. Can you use it? You bet! Next time you negotiate car price in the car dealership, try to find out what a dealer's comfortable distance is and move into his space. You might be surprised with the discount you get.

Example: focus of attention plus negative commands. I am going to talk about negative commands later, this chapter is more about attention. Because so far I was concerned with "making your conscious mind go away". Not necessarily the only way. We can simply provide a message in a form that your "critical faculty" wouldn't care about.

To illustrate this point, I will tell you a real story of "naturally occurring curse". Naturally − because no one was cursing anyone, all parties involved had the best intentions. But the "real" curse can be delivered this way, and it was especially unpleasant to realize that things like that can happen by accident.

I was leaving the party. And I had few drinks. The hosts of the party (he and she) walked me to the door, and I remember discussing something very important with HIM, and very interesting, too. While SHE was talking in the same time, and it kind of created a background noise, but as what HE was saying was so interesting, I was not paying attention. Until I realized WHAT she is saying − and it was only because I spend so much time with NLP.

"You had so much alcohol that you will not be very good as a driver. Don't fall asleep. Don't make an accident."

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44 Well, first of all, as I will explain later, there is no negative for the unconscious mind. It would be more like "don't FALL ASLEEP AND MAKE AN ACCIDENT".

And second, by having an interesting conversation, I wasn't paying any attention, so my "filters" was off.

Was it a properly done curse? No, because there are few mandatory elements that were missing. But could it work? You bet.

Critical faculty and finding a way around it. I already mentioned the Critical Faculty couple of times. Let's finally find out what is it.

First of all, it is a metaphor. If you cut the brain open, you wouldn't find it. It is just the way to explain things, and a very convenient way.

Second, it is NOT the conscious mind, but probably a part of a conscious mind.

It is a filter.

As you already know, in different states people have different resources. The "playing the piano" state has resources that are totally different from the "fighting in a bar" state. And in some states (altered states, but all of them are altered in one way or another) the person does not have one particular resource − the ability to resist a suggestion.

This resource is called the "critical faculty" and it is usually associated with the "conscious mind" as opposed to "unconscious mind". The way it works − it filters all the information the person receives from the outside world and if applies certain

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45 criteria to this information. You approach someone and say "listen to me. I want you to be my humble servant." What will happen? Yes, it hurts... But what happens before he punched you in the nose? His critical faculty intercepted the harmful command, and refused to follow it.

Now, this is a rather dramatic example. Most of areas where you use hypnosis are much more civilized. You may help person to quit smoking, or to become a better golf player, or even to stop eating chocolate − who knows? Miracles happen. And if the person is in the "conscious" state he will not respond well to the "no more chocolate" command, even if he asked you to help with this problem and paid you to do that. The critical faculty will interfere, saying "nope. I am a chocolate eater. That's who I am. That's what I do."

How do we shut it down?

We move a person to the altered state of mind. In most of the altered states the person is not used to use his critical faculty! I know that sounds strange, but have you ever tried to suggest something to your children while they are watching all this Pokemon stuff? They are not paying attention, you are saying. Yes, consciously they do not − and it means their critical faculty is gone, too. But unconscious is always present. It will hear.

This is why TV commercials are so good (they are bad, but they are good in it). Think about it. You are watching the "Episode 25", and the bad guy is about to blow all the good guys IN THE GALAXY and over sudden they stop fighting evil forces to tell you to buy this health insurance... Where is your critical faculty at that moment? In the galaxy far, far away − that's where! And suggestion goes directly into your unconscious mind.

But wait! You are not that stupid. The moment they start commercials, you go to the

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46 kitchen to get this wonderful chocolate bar (that they advertised yesterday − is it a coincidence?). You do not sit there watching commercials. Yes, you can hear the words, but are you paying any attention? No. You are not paying any conscious attention to the words. And the suggestion goes into your unconscious.

And the way your unconscious works, by the way − it is there to carry the orders. Your orders, my orders − does not matter as long as they passed the critical faculty. If you know it you can use it to your advantage.

That's how the techniques described in Introduction to State of Power work − they are bringing you in the state where anything is possible by simply giving your unconscious mind the proper directions.

Example: a hand watch induction. The "excuse me, can you tell me what time is it?" is another example of a pattern of behavior. And to start this pattern we do not have to go through the entire introduction. We can say "excuse me, can you tell me..." while looking at the person's hand watch − the response will be triggered before we stop talking.

So let's begin with the "excuse me, can you tell me" and then "where is the closest Starbucks cafe". The moment of confusion will be created when the person (that is already looking at the time) gets the second part of the message. Then you say something like "you are going there" − might just work as a command, and (she) will have coffee with you.

Triple spiral and a concept of "different resources for different states". There are states, and they are different. We know that. And there are submodalities of

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47 each state, and they are different, too. And there are memories about the state, and they might be not accessible from the other states. So let's discuss a technique, that will move you to the different state (as confusion techniques do, but in a more powerful way), give you a command and move you back so that the critical faculty cannot reject the command and actually, does not remember it.

This techniques also serves as a good illustration to the point that there is "no others" for the unconscious mind, so talking about other people is the same as talking about the person in front of you − from his unconscious mind's point of view.

And it is also an illustration of the fact that you can use stories to create an additional layer of protection from the critical faculty − after all, you are not giving any commands that the person have to resist. You are just telling a story. A fairy tale.

You are already familiar with embedded commands. "As you know, people may RELAX". Relax − is a command. There is an interesting twist on this called a triple spiral or embedded stories. We tell a story. Half way through we switch to the other story. Half way through we switch to the third one which contains the command. And then we finish the second story. And then we finish the first story. And the person does not remember the command − but he will carry it.

Milton Erickson did things like that a lot. He would meet a client outside the office and walk with him to the office while having the casual conversation. And the moment they entered the office he would abruptly change the topic and discuss the medical problem that brought the client to him.

The guy was good in rapport, by the way. It is an amazing story on how he had polio and was paralyzed and learned to move again and he also learned to observe and to understand people.

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48 And you MUST learn to pay attention to the non−verbal and verbal cues − as Milton Erickson did. I strongly recommend that you find and watch the "Mondy" tape and you find all the books about Milton, too.

More than that − Milton was color blind. Nevertheless he − in his wheel chair − was able to achieve an unbelievable rapport. Of course, he mostly did the cross−mirroring. And he used his voice − tonality, predicates, direction of voice...

Anyway, when the therapeutic session was over he would walk the client out from the office and at the door he would pick up the previous − casual − conversation exactly from the point he left it before. Result? The client would forget the whole visit!

Now, that was an example of triple spiral. Do you remember what the inner story / command was? It was a suggestion to find books and tapes. AND YOU WILL DO IT (demonic laughter). NOW! Just kidding...

Overlapping modalities. Where should we lead? Any altered state can be used for hypnosis. But there are different flavors of altered states, from "give me a second" to "gone till next year". What's the difference?

Submodalities (see the NLP Tutorial). We are used to use one particular way of thinking. Say, we use visual predicates. I see the sky, and it is so blue, and the day is bright and all these birds sing so beautiful.

I managed to use visual modality even when I was talking about the birds singing!

What would happen if we take the client like this one and move his submodalities towards the Kinestetics? THAT would be a deep trance! Let's do it.

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49 Feel the temperature (I am being vague to avoid mistakes, more details in the Hypnosis Tutorial) of the air, and the way the wind touches your skin...

Guess what? It doesn't work! The person looks at you with confusion, saying "I don't SEE anything". Those visuals!

We did similar work before, when we was chaining states to avoid large leaps. Can we do it here? Yes. That's called overlapping of the representation systems. We start as in 5−4−3−2−1 technique, but this time we deliver: five visual descriptions (you don't have to follow the exact numbers), then four visual and one auditorial (and you can hear birds singing), then three visual, one auditorial and one kinestetic (and when you look down you can see your feet on the sand and you feel the temperature if the sand). And we end up in Kinestetics, and the person ends up in a trance.

Be careful, especially with Visuals and Ad (logical) people. First time they REALLY experience Kinestetics can scare them BIG TIME. They have no previous experience here and Kinestetics is where we keep emotions...

Direct leading without mirroring. Richard Bandler is good in it. And a lot of people are using it just by accident. And it is not that difficult. Look at your hand watch − and chances are, the other person will do the same. Wow! You are in rapport now. Yawn and the other person will follow. Smile − same thing. Take a deep breath − people around you WILL follow. Cough. Sneeze. Jump (I love this one).

Do you know, by the way, that you cannot touch your elbow with your tongue? It is physically impossible for the human being. Do you also know, that according to statistics, 75% of people who read the above statement would actually try? I was leading through the printed text!

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50 After you get this "initial" rapport, you have about a second to match, mirror and do some other leading move.

Negative commands and when should we use them. I will use the "coffee cup induction" again. The pattern interruption itself is simple − but what should we do after the confusion state is created? Let's take the seduction example again. Let's offer a girl (a man) a cup and then take it back, and during the moment of confusion we say...

"...don't fall in love with me..."

And then we give the cup and pick up the conversation we had before.

What is important about this particular way of doing things? First of all, there should be a conversation, and an interesting one. And when doing the interruption, we STOP the conversation and after we are done, we PICK IT UP at exactly the same spot. If you can, break the sentence and then continue from the middle of the sentence.

And be in rapport.

And what about the "don't" part?

There are few rules about the way unconscious mind operates, and I mentioned some of them before. Like there is no difference between real and imaginary experience, there is no past, and there is no others. One more rule here − there is no negative.

When someone is walking the ice and you shout "don't slip" − what happens? First,

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51 the unconscious mind have to understand what is it, we are NOT supposed to do. And it draws a mental picture of − yes, of the person slipping. And as the thought affects our physiology, very often the "slip" physiology takes over. And the person falls.

No negatives means that there is no difference between "slip" and "don't slip", except for the fact that in the second case you cannot be accused in anything − you "had" good intentions.

There is no difference between the "fall in love" and "don't fall in love". Men and woman are equally responsive to this kind of commands.

Except for the "opposite responders" − we call this a group of people who would do and say everything "the other way around". You say "it is a nice day" − they answer "no, it is not". To deal with this group, we use the "isn't it", "don't you" and similar clauses. "It is a good day" − as soon as they hear this, they are ready to respond with "no", but at this exact moment the "isn't it" arrives, and for the unconscious with its simplified grammar it is not clear anymore, if the answer should be "no" or "yes". Confusion. Good.

Congruent and incongruent physiology. How to say "wake up" and put person to sleep. I already mentioned being CONGRUENT when I was talking about the behavior of a Hypnotist. I just didn't call it this name. Being congruent means that what you say is communicating the same message as what you "transmit" through your physiology. If you say "I am happy" with the unhappy face − it is an example of an incongruent behavior.

Usually, you want to be congruent. If you are doing Hypnosis, you need to talk

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52 confident, be confident, move confident... If you are doing a humor show you need to laugh to your own jokes, too.

But there is an exception. What if we want to send a covert message, the one that the conscious mind cannot pick up? Can we say one thing and in the same time to deliver another message by our behavior?

The answer is yes. I am not going to teach details of this technique, as it is difficult to come up with the uses of it. Except for one use. The curses. So I will only mention it to let you know that this stuff is "out there" and you might want to be able to recognize it.

There is the old "prejustice" that adults are not supposed to compliment little children. Or else. The possible explanation is that the adults might say one thing (what a nice baby) and mean the different thing. And the second message is delivered through the physiology. So − yes − you can say "have a nice day" being CONGRUENT to the "damn you" − and the person will feel bad.

Good news − we can undo this kind of "curses" using the standard tools of NLP, like phobia cure, EFT or reframing (see NLP Tutorial). My personal favorite is the State of Power techniques as they are not only undoing the past damage, but also making the person "bullet−proof" for the future.

Breaking the rapport. The pattern interruption techniques are examples of the larger class of techniques based on breaking the rapport. Because when you shake someone's hand − you are in a rapport. And that's a rapport, that I am breaking. Not just the pattern.

So let's forget about the patterns. Let's just mirror the person. And after the

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53 "connection" is established and he feels that "you are like him" − do something that he does not expect. Stand up. Change the posture. Anything. If the rapport is good, the person will follow. But even if he does not stop half way through (as I do every time when I mirror a woman and she touches her hear, and I do the same and then start laughing) there will be a moment of a confusion. If you do something VERY unexpected, the confusion will be longer. According to Grinder and Bandler, when done properly, the handshake interruption can throw some people to the deep trance for MINUTES − they just stay there, looking at their hand.

Using pauses. We are paying attention, right? We notice the signs of trance AND we notice the eye patterns. And when the person is accessing the memory, or creating one − we better stop talking to his left (logical) brain as it is busy. We might still deliver short commands to the right brain...

And we are building anticipation. So if we are telling a story, we make pauses in the interesting places − it will make the other person feel as if THEY want us to continue. And it will also allow them to create all those images in their mind.

You will find two kinds of hypnotists in the field. One kind would use as many words as can be squeezed into the conversation. And the other kind will speak only when necessary, allowing for the person to fill the gaps.

Because no mater how good you are, the person can do a better job hypnotizing himself.

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Maps of reality. One of the NLP Presuppositions (see the NLP Tutorial) states that "the map is not a territory". It means that we have some ideas (the map) of how world works and we behave according to these ideas.

And not according to the world.

It is a very powerful concept. If the map is incomplete or contains mistakes, we are going to have all kinds of problems, as the world contradicts the map and it is called a conflict.

We can also have more than one map. We can believe that all people are good when we are in a happy state. And we can believe that all people are bad − when we are unhappy. Obviously, maps are incompatible. And you might notice that each map is attached to certain state, so that we behave (to some extent) as different people in a different situations.

But the situation might require resources that are not present in the map that comes with this situation. Example? Public speaking. The person can be an excellent speaker when talking to the monitor of his computer, but the moment he has someone to talk to − different state, different map. It is called fear of public speaking and can be easily changed using NLP or Hypnosis or State of Power techniques.

Example: using maps of reality. If the person is responding not to the reality but to his ideas about the reality, we better give him only what is on his map. Otherwise he wouldn't understand, he might even not notice that we are talking to him... Wait a minute! Consciously he might not,

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55 but did I not mention before that the unconscious notices everything? Can that be a technique?

Yes, but this technique is not very well developed. It is called a double message technique and basically, you need to tell a story that the person will not believe consciously AND that create (like a triple spiral or a metaphor) the direction for an unconscious mind only. The triple spiral and the metaphors are more efficient.

But what if we join the person in his map or his model of a reality? Can we then lead? Yes. For example, do you believe in energy? The chi type of the energy? If yes, then I can do the EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) on you and I will talk in terms of "I am tapping into your energy channels". But what if you don't believe in chi and believe in natural sciences instead? Well, then I will use the EFT on you, and tell you about the Visual Kinestetic Disassociation it creates. The results will be the same − your phobia is gone and you are happy.

So as a therapist, and especially as a Hypnotist − keep your map for yourself and do not force it on others. Use their map instead.

Example: using gaps in the map of reality. This is a real story, but it is one of the stories that are difficult to believe. A story about a ten years old girl in New York, a very, VERY beautiful girl that once got in a real trouble on the street where she was not supposed to be and in the time when she was supposed to be in bed.

Just imagine this girl walking in the night (after she had an argument with her parents, but this is a different story. It is all long forgotten and forgiven anyway. Last time I saw this family − they was happy and well). So it is night, dark street, no lights (well, technically − they are there, they are just broken) and a drunk adult

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56 approaching with "look, a woman!" greeting...

The question is − what this little girl did (that she learned from her mother, by the way) that this adult run (and I mean it − RUN!) away?

To answer this question, let's consider pattern interruption techniques AGAIN. The pattern is broken and the person is going deep inside looking for the new pattern of behavior. What if there is no pattern? What if the map of the person's reality contains a gap?

Then some time (seconds, maybe minutes, if you are good) the person will come back from the trance.

Unless (and I mentioned it before (and see the Virus of the Mind : The New Science of the Meme by Richard Brodie for details) you are not only interrupting the pattern but also pushing the "magical buttons". Now, this is a different story.

What if we present a THREAT that requires an immediate resolution and there is no information in person's map of reality? Then the unconscious mind will take control and do what it was doing long before we started to learn NLP and call ourselves humans. It runs away.

Warning: this technique is a sure way of CREATING a negative suppressed memory (in the other person), so please − do not play with it. It is a harmful technique.

So imagine the dark narrow street of New York and you are a man walking towards the girl and suddenly the girl ROARS at you and walking towards you as they do in the horror movies, and there is a foam at her lips... Does your map of reality have a program of behavior for the case if you are attacked in the middle of the night by a child? This men's map didn't...

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Example: more patterns to interrupt. Handshake. This one we already know. Handshake and the last moment we move the hand away. The coffee cup induction. The handwatch induction. The "break the rapport induction". What else?

How about the handshake and then you do not let it go? And the other person is not clear when will it ends and he is confused. And you keep talking hypnoteese...

How about sitting down or standing up from the chair? How about stepping on the person's foot − this technique was used by thiefs in Prague (I think it was in Prague). The victim was "interrupted" and then instructed to forget everything − and the only memory left was the missing wallet.

How about bumping into someone on the street and instead of "sorry" giving a command − again, I found this one in newspapers about 15 years ago...

How about calling someone by phone and saying "so... what are YOU calling me about"?

How about (direct leading!) asking "do you hear (overlap) this smell? The person − voluntarily − follows your command and as he is smelling the air, he is in the Kinestetic modality now! Altered state...

The possibilities are countless. Eating − the "put a spoon in your mouse" is a pattern. Going to the washroom − make the door handle soft (like plush) and wait for the "naturally occurring" trance ;)

How about − it was actually done by Milton Erickson − bending to tie the shoe laces while the other person is staying with his hand in a "handshake" position, trying to

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58 figure out what to do next. It was done in front of a full room (symposium of psychologists), which probably confused poor fellow even more.

Rapport as an ultimate technique. I mentioned rapport many times. Now, why is it so important? Mostly because when you create and amplify this "he is like me" feeling, the other person's mind gets confused of who is who here. And whatever YOU are saying − gets accepted as something THEY think. It can become so strong, that they will not believe you later on, if you mention that YOU said certain things and not them.

And after you mirrored the person, you can lead them. And if you choose to − you can lead them into a deep trance simply by going there. Just make sure you can get out when you have to.

Example: leading to deep sleep in two minutes. Mirror the person. Make sure YOU get this warm and fuzzy feeling that is a sign of a deep rapport. Then slightly close your eyes, yawn and say "want to SLE−E−EP..."

If you did everything correctly, the person will fall asleep. It is a good idea to do a little preparation − by slowing down your breathing and relaxing your body, and making sure the person follows.

Conclusion. This is not all and not most of hypnotic techniques. Not half of them, and not even ten percent. Also keep in mind, that you can simply read about the technique or you can master it and make it perfect.

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59 I believe that NLP and Hypnosis should go together as they compliment each other and it is one of the cases when the sum is larger than parts. I also believe in you and in the fact that you will USE IT to MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY.

That is it. The end.

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